


Brace for Impact

by SuperWoman0124



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 20k+, 30k+, 40k+, Anal Sex, Bottom Bucky Barnes, Bottom Steve Rogers, Consensual Kink, Cute, Deaf Clint Barton, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Dates, HTML text messages, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Light Bondage, Living Together, M/M, Modern AU, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Online Dating, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Bucky Barnes, Sex Toys, Sex Toys Under Clothing, Shower Sex, Slow Burn, Steve is in therapy, Stucky - Freeform, Top Bucky Barnes, Top Steve Rogers, art by gravesecrets, coffeehouse AU, deep, embedded text messages, some kink, traumatized Steve Rogers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-11
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-05-04 20:14:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 43,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14600850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperWoman0124/pseuds/SuperWoman0124
Summary: "Steve was nervous opening it, but there he was. His hair was a bit longer, wet and slicked back, holding up a peace sign. He was gorgeous, the toothy smile shaded by the darkness in the room and suddenly, Steve really wanted to get to know this person. His hair was tucked back into a bun and the fingers on his right hand were perched in a peace sign. His eyes were blue and weary, as if he hadn’t slept in months. But they were kind and soft. Bucky’s hoodie was muddled as he sat back on what appeared to be a bedframe. His smile was smooth and his lips were relaxed into a smile. Steve’s heart sunk."After the insistence from many people around Steve, he rejoins the dating community and let's just say? It really did not go well.Until it did.





	1. Russian Cupid

**Author's Note:**

> The first half of this fic is somewhat text message heavy. (It’s all HTML, so you have to have the author’s skin on.) The texts will eventually drop off and be scattered. This is my first time using heavy HTML in any kind of format, so if there are any glitches, my apologies. Tell me and I’ll fix them. ( I will be posting the same fic without the HTML… eventually, cause I need it for FF.net anyway.) 
> 
> The wonderful and amazing gravesecret (tumblr) did the “selfies” for this fic and I am SHOOK by how amazing they turned out!!! Can we get a nice, big round of applause for this wonderful human being, ladies and gentleman?!?! (or whatever else you could possibly be)? Here’s a link to their tumblr post. :)  
> (https://gravesecret.tumblr.com/post/173800279702/steve-raced-up-the-stairs-to-his-apartment-keys)  
> Give them all the moneys for all the beautiful fanart. 
> 
> This is a part of my “Challenge Yourself” series that me and my broseph a_vause1980 have been hatching and scratching at since February of 2018. Come check us out for all your fanfiction needs. This one needed to be a coffeehouse AU. 
> 
> WARNING; now, I've never used an online dating website and this fic no way represents the way the actual website works. The only thing relating this fic to pof.com is the profiles info I took and the name. It's not full of creepers like stated and it's actually a good online dating website to use. (Or so I've heard. That's how my sister met her partner.)
> 
> OPINIONS, REACTIONS & COMMENTS ARE MY FOOD. FEED MY BEAST SO I CAN KEEP PRODUCING FICS YOU/I LOVE!

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 01/25 (Russian Cupid) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

"Dr. Banner, sir-" 

_"Bruce._ I've told you, Steven, call me Bruce. I'm your physiatrist, not your drill sergeant." Bruce impatiently crossed his legs, placing the tip of the pen on his lower lip. 

"Bruce," Steve adjusts in his seat, uneasy by the previous topic of conversation. "I've told you to call me Steve." 

"Sorry." A knowing smirk spreads across his features as he scribbles something on his yellow pad with a ballpoint pen. 

"Bruce, I'm not comfortable dating. I-" Steve let out a hefty sigh. "Not after last time. It’s too soon." Steve caressed his ribs with the lightest of touches. 

"Steve, I still think it's in your best interest. You can take my advice, or you won't. But..." Bruce paused, "I can't be the only one you ever open up to. You need to find someone who you can share yourself with, help unburden you." 

"It's impossible." 

"Nothing's impossible when you set your mind to it." Bruce glanced to the ticking clock behind Steve's head, sighing. "I'm afraid our time is up for today." 

"Great." Steve stood, straight as an arrow and offered his hand out to Bruce, just as he did every Wednesday. Bruce shook it with a small smile on his face. "Thank you for your time today, Dr. Banner." 

"Any time. Day or night!" Banner shouted as Steve headed out the door into the bustling Brooklyn streets, a heavy weight lifted from his shoulders. The same lightweight feeling he felt every time he left the office. 

Today was oddly busy, and he was headed two streets over to his friend Natasha's to help her hang a full length mirror. Well, that was her excuse. Steve knew full well that Nat was completely capable of doing it herself, but liked to have excuses to have Steve over for gossiping and a bottle of wine. 

Nat's house was plush, full of smooth block archways, beautiful bending architecture and modern art. Blood red walls in all 6 rooms to go with the marble columns spread through the house. White furniture, often replaced to keep it clean, littered the entire building. And she lived there all by herself. Steve loved going to her house. 

Steve arrived at her stoop and as he opened the door to come in, a frazzled gentleman holding his tennis shoes stalked out, beginning what Steve believed to be his walk of shame. 

Poor kid. He looked too nice to be used up and spit out by his friend. 

Steve walked into her entryway and toed off his shoes, waving at the redhead balanced on the edge of the couch, smoking a cigarette. 

"*Pree-veete, Rogers." Nat spoke without turning, taking a long drag from her cigarette, words harshed by the smoke. 

"Hey, Nat." Steve strode in, sitting beside her on the couch, watching her, watching some russian news program. "Who was the kid walkin' out?" 

Natasha scoffed. "Nobody, apparently. Someone I met at the bar last night. Told me he loved me, love at first sight and all that. So I kicked his ass out." 

"Ouch! Nat, you probably hurt his feelings." Steve chuckled, half joking and half serious. Nat's sex life was about the same as Steve's, only the complete opposite. Nat brought a new guy home once a week, and Steve... well, he'd been sex free for 2 years. 

"Feelings, schmeelings, who needs them? All I need is mindless sex and cigarettes." 

Natasha slid down the side of the couch and sat beside Steve, laying her head on his shoulder. "Speaking of which, you desperate enough for it yet?" Nat looked at Steve for the first time since he came in, sporting her best pouty face. 

"Nat, we've been over this." He knew she was joking and he couldn't stop the grin creeping up his face. 

Nat sat up and extinguished her cigarette. "Com'on kid, you and me, some music, some wine, naked, bumping uglies. What could go wrong?" 

"I could throw up." Steve poked a rib in her side. 

"I know, I know. Nat, " she mocked with false vibrato, standing and pointing a finger at Steve. _"We've been over this. I'm gay. Gay guys do not screw their girl friends when they're bored._ and I'd say, "pllllease?" And you'd say, _"Sorry, Nat. No can do"_

Steve chuckled as Nat walked to the kitchen. 

"Sounds about right." Natasha walked across the room, wine bottle in hand, screwing the corkscrew into the top. When it finally came open, she returned to the bar at the edge of the room to fetch glasses. 

"I know. Never hurts to ask though, right?" She set the glasses on the table and poured them a generous amount each, the wine as red as the Russian's hair. 

She clinked the side of the glass against the side of Steve's. 

"*Ura." And she downed every last drop. She poured herself another before returning beside Steve, laying her head on his shoulder. 

"So when are you gonna get a boyfriend?" 

"Naaaat-" Steve sat up. 

"Well, Steve, come on. You can't live vicariously through me ‘til we have wrinkles, you gotta get out there. Do stuff. Meet someone." 

"I-" Steve sighed. "I'm trying." He lied. 

"Steven Grant Rogers, did you just lie to your best friend?" She put on her best offensive face as he placed a hand over her heart, mouth agape with shock. 

"N-No. I didn't!" Steve flushed, backtracking. "Do you and my therapist talk about me behind my back?" 

"Why, did Doctor-Hot-Stuff suggest you get a boyfriend, too?" 

"He did." 

"Well it's a good thing I'll be helping." Natasha buried her wide smirk in the brim of her wine glass, backing away from Steve's arm span. “Doctor's orders.”

"Nat," Steve instantly knew something was wrong. "What'd you do?" 

"Nothing." She shrugged, sipping her wine. 

"Naaat." 

"What? It's just a stupid website. Everybody has one." 

Steve's face went white as a sheet to as red as the walls surrounding. "What did you do?" 

Nat reached over Steve to pull over her laptop, flipping the top up. Her last window was up, under _plentyoffish.com._ Steve looked over her shoulder at the profile she'd created for him, and surprisingly, it was pretty accurate. The picture had been an impressive one, one he'd never seen before. It was a full body shot of Steve in his favorite button up flannel, all tucked in the right places to show his muscular proportions. He was lounging in one of the loveseats at Natasha's, holding his wine glass to the camera. 

All the information, height, sign, if he wanted children, were all correct, until he looked at the username she used. 

"American Dream? Seriously? " Steve looked at her incredulously. 

"Well, 'Introvert-from-Brooklyn' was taken." She tilted her head back in a hearty laugh, punching Steve in the shoulder. "I thought it was clever!" 

He looked over the profile and under the "Messages" screen, there were 16 to reply to. 

"I wasn't even going to tell you about it. But when people started winking at you, I figured I probably should." 

"How long has this been up?" Steve scooted the laptop to his lap, using the mouse to check the messages. 

Nat dramatically looked to the non-existent watch on her wrist. 

"About 4 hours." 

"Christ!" Steve clicked the link and the messages popped up. The first message read, 

_"Dear American Dream. You're the finest thing I've ever seen, and I'd love to tap that."_

Steve hit the delete button. 

_"Yo!"_ The next one read. _"Ur fuckn gorgeous. Hit me up sometime if u wanna party."_ Followed by a phone number. 

Delete. 

The next names and messages were all the same. 'Gay_cock_69' 'Hung_Gent_12' 'Eat_my_ass' 

"Are they all like this?" Steve's jaw wouldn't shut. He was stunned by some of these. How degrading some of them were. 

He got all the way to the last message, almost deleted it, but when he saw the username; he opened it instead. 

“Just_Bucky sent you a wink. The message:

Just_Bucky  
  
Hey, just saw your profile. We seem to have a lot in common. You like to draw? Me too. Uhhh... I don't really know what to say.  
  


Steve stifled a laugh at the awkwardness. He felt the same way about online dating. 

Just_Bucky  
  
Hey, just saw your profile. We seem to have a lot in common. You like to draw? Me too. Uhhh... I don't really know what to say.  
  
Maybe we could meet up for coffee some time? Maybe you could teach me to draw.  
  


Steve opened his profile. No drugs, lived local, only a few years older and...

Natasha peeked over his shoulder. 

"Damn! He's cute! Is he one of the pervy ones?" 

"No, actually it's kinda sweet." Steve scanned his profile, reading the bio. And looking at the profile picture. The brunette had his head down, his hair was a bit on the longer side but his cheekbones were… perfect. And the light smilie that peeked out was one that Steve could say he wanted to see in real life. 

"Send him a message!" Natasha slid the laptop over to her lap as Steve tried to close it. 

"I don't think I'm ready!" Steve fought to close it, but before he could, Nat clicked the wink icon. 

"There." Nat smirked. "Now, you can send him a message to go with that wink, or you can seem like that really slutty guy that sends winks to everyone." 

Steve huffed. The guy was cute, but his profile did say it was an old picture. Maybe it's a _really_ old picture. Maybe the guy was 88-years old getting his rocks off online. Maybe he was a scam artist, maybe... Steve sighed again. Maybe he was just a guy from Brooklyn having the same troubles Steve was finding a date. 

"Fine, gimme the laptop." 

Nat squeeled, handing it over. She held out her hand. "Phone." 

Steve opened the laptop and dug his phone out of his pocket, mindlessly handing it over. He clicked the message box and took a deep breath.

Just_Bucky  
  
Maybe we could meet up for coffee some time? Maybe you could teach me to draw.  
  
'Hey, Just_Bucky. I don't really know what to do here, either. Lol. My friend set this profile up and you're the first normal guy I've gotten a message from.  
  


Nat peered up at the phone and looked over Steve's shoulder.

"LOL? What are you, like 15?" 

"Shut up." Steve returned to the message, unsure how to finish it.

Just_Bucky  
  
'Hey, Just_Bucky. I don't really know what to do here, either. Lol. My friend set this profile up and you're the first normal guy I've gotten a message from.  
  
Yes, I like to draw. I don’t know if I’m very good, but I enjoy it. I've been doing it since I was a kid. How about you?  


Nat looked back over, pulling her attention from Steve's phone.

"Tell 'em coffee sounds great." 

"I don't think I'm ready for coffee." Steve shook his head no. 

"Rogers, it's just coffee. It's not a blowjob in an alleyway." She flailed her arms out, nearly hitting Steve in the chest. 

"Nat!" Steve turned to her incredulously. 

"What? It's the truth! Coffee's not even a date, it's just... **coffee."**

After a few moments, Steve considered it.

Just_Bucky  
  
Yes, I like to draw. I'm don’t know if I’m very good, but I enjoy it. I've been doing it since I was a kid. How about you?  
  
And coffee sounds great. Maybe we should get to know each other first so we don't end up on the show "Catfish"?'   


"You're so lame, it hurts." Natasha chuckled, handing Steve his phone back. Steve hovered his mouse over the send button, before taking a deep breath. Sent.

"Got you all set up. Downloaded the app, logged in and pulled up your loverboy's page. There's an instant message option on there, in case you get tired of snail mail." 

"Gee, thanks, Nat." Steve scoffed, placing the laptop on the table. 

**Ping!**

Steve's phone rang, an instant message. 

_"Message from Just_Bucky. Accept?"_

Steve hit yes.

Just_Bucky  
  
Catfish, huh? You're not a 500 lb. woman with 50 cats, are you?  
  


Steve laughed, flashing the message at Nat, who echoed his laughter.

"Alright, kid's got jokes. I like it." 

"What're you gonna say?" 

"Dunno. Just.. be myself I guess."

Just_Bucky  
  
Catfish, huh? You're not a 500 lb. woman with 50 cats, are you?  
  
I'm not really a cat person.  
  
You tellin' me you have an eating problem?  
  
Nahh. It says I'm Athletic on my profile, right? I am who it says I am. What about you? You're not an 88-year-old man getting his rocks off online, are you?  
  


Just_Bucky  
  
Not the last time I checked. Sorry if I seem a little weird. You're the first person I've talked to on this thing. My buddy Clint told me about it.  
  
same here. My best friend Natasha set me up.  
  
Huh. Sounds like we need to get us some new friends.  
  
I'm working on it. :)  
  


"A smiley face? Oh my gawd." Nat rolled her eyes, crossing her legs over Steve's lap. "It's pathetic watching you flirt."

"Hey, I'm rusty! Plus, he thinks I'm funny." He didn't add the assumed "I hope" at the end.

Just_Bucky  
  
Mind if I ask you some questions? Try to get to know you a bit?  
  


Steve tapped his finger against his lower lip. 

Just_Bucky  
  
How about a Quid Pro Quo, Clarice?  
  
Nice namedrop! Sure, I don't mind. I'll go first. How do I not know you? I've been in Brooklyn my whole life. I'm pretty sure I would have remembered seeing someone like you walking around.  
  
I don't know how I don't know you either. Born and raised here. Someone like me?  
  
Uhhh. That wasn't supposed to be offensive. I'm just saying, you're probably the most attractive man I've ever seen... ever. And I've traveled the world. Not to be creepy.. or anything. I'm sorry if that seemed creepy.  
  


Steve felt the blush run to his cheeks and he felt the warmth sitting there. 

Just_Bucky  
  
Don't worry, it was only kind of creepy. And thank you? I think. Pretty sure it's my turn.  
  
Ask away. I'm pretty much an open book.  
  
Your profile says that you were in the war?  
  
Straight to the hard stuff, huh? Yes, I was.  


Just_Bucky  
  
Crazy shit over there. Anything bad happen to you?  
  
Maybe one day I'll tell you. But right now, that's not something I'd like to discuss.  
  


Steve sat back and watched Nat playing on her laptop to his right.

"He's hiding something." Steve mentioned, turning his phone over to Nat. 

"So?" Nat read through, unimpressed as Steve sipped his wine. "Aren't we all? Can't expect a guy you've been talking to for half an hour to open up about his deep dark secrets. How would you have felt if he asked what happened to you after you were in the war?" 

"I would have said the same thing he did." 

"So you think he's being unreasonable?" 

"I guess not."

Just_Bucky  
  
That's not unreasonable. So, your turn.  
  
Why do you need this stupid website to find a date?  
  
I don't. I wasn't really looking, to be honest. Too bad everyone else thinks so. You?  
  
same. I don't dislike being alone, but sometimes the companionship is nice.  


The conversation went on for a few hours just like that. Them getting to know each other. They made each other laugh, revealed more about themselves, and after Natasha got sick of talking to a brick wall, she kicked Steve out.

"Don't sleep with him on the first date! Call me tonight!" Were Nat's last words to Steve as he let himself out. It was dark now, so he hopped on his motorcycle and rode home. 

**Ping!**

Just_Bucky  
  
Are you alone?  
  
I am. Is this a part of the conversation where you get all creepy and ask me to sit on balloons or something?  
  
No! Oh my god, no. Feel free to say no, but I have to know if you're real. You seem too good to be true. Can you send me a selfie with something like a peace sign up so I know you're you? No balloons, I promise. I mean, I believe you. But I don't wanna get my hopes up if you are a crazy cat lady.  
  
Sure. So long as you return the favor.  
  


Steve raced up the stairs to his apartment, keys in hand and pushed his way through the door. He instantly took his shirt off without thinking, collapsing on his bed. He opened the camera app on his phone, flattening the short unruly spikes in the front of his hair. He held up a peace sign, visible to the camera as he snapped a picture.

American_Dream sent Just_Bucky a photo.

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/154240319@N04/41981828981/in/dateposted-public/)

Just_Bucky sent American_Dream a photo.

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/154240319@N04/28110226128/in/dateposted-public/)

Steve was nervous opening it, but there he was. His hair was a bit longer, wet and slicked back, holding up a peace sign. He was gorgeous, the toothy smile shaded by the darkness in the room and suddenly, Steve really wanted to get to know this person. His hair was tucked back into a bun and the fingers on his right hand were perched in a peace sign. His eyes were blue and weary, as if he hadn’t slept in months. But they were kind and soft. Bucky’s hoodie was muddled as he sat back on what appeared to be a bedframe. His smile was smooth and his lips were relaxed into a smile. Steve’s heart sunk.

Just_Bucky  
  
Whoa.  
  
Whoa is right. How are you even real?  
  
I was about to ask you the same thing.  
  
So... coffee?  
  
Yes. Coffee.  
  


They agreed to meet the next afternoon at a coffee shop in mid-town that they'd both been to before. Steve had a restless night, dreams of what Just_Bucky was really like.

He clutched his keys in his hand after one last mirror check before heading out, flattening an unruly bang away from his face. His nerves were shot as he hopped onto his bike and strapped on the helmet, merging his way into traffic. 

He waxed her special this morning, his Triumph Bonneville T100. He’d bought the bike used from a car salesman that smelled like cheese when he got home from the army. He couldn’t resist her sleek, smooth, tubular steel twin cradle chassis, the fact that she was a european gal or the way he looked sitting on it. It turned out she was a finicky woman, but Steve loved his Loola dearly.

He made it to the coffee shop 20 minutes early, walking to the counter with a shy smile. He looked around in the practically empty coffeeshop, surveying the hipsters in the corner of the room. He ordered his coffee, an extra large amount due to staying up so late last night, and tucked himself to the side of the room to wait. He observed the front door momentarily as he opened his phone, checking for new responses from Just_Bucky. 

He hadn't texted since last night and Steve began to grow concerned that he wouldn't show, maybe forgetting about their meet entirely. He felt defeated and sad as he scrolled back through the messages from yesterday, wondering if he'd said something he shouldn't have. 

"Mocha for Steve!" 

Steve turned and took his coffee, picking a booth in the back corner of the room and glaring at the front door. He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket to text him, and the front door chimed. Steve was not expecting just how gorgeous this man was. His hair was tucked back into a short ponytail that sat at the nape of his neck, a tight red hoodie rested on his broad shoulders with his hands laced in the pocket in front. His muscular stature was dissimilar from Steve's, but definitely not unsatisfactory. Bucky looked around the room before he spotted Steve, an elated (and most likely relieved) smile crept across his lips. 

He sauntered over and offered his right hand to shake. 

"American Dream?" The gravel-fed voice slipped from the stranger's smooth lips, perked up in an angel’s smile. 

"Dear _God,_ please don't call me that." Steve took the offered hand and took a moment to observe his bright, open eyes and stubbled beard, internally nodding his approval. "I'm Steve. Steve Rogers." Steve shook his head and snapped out of it, taking his hand back and tucking it in his lap. 

"Bucky. As in Just Bucky." 

"Is that like Cher?" 

The look that Bucky served him was lighthearted and kind, his smile reaching his eyes. 

"No, not like Cher. Bucky Barnes." 

"Good." Steve suddenly didn't know how to act or what to say now that this man was in front of him. "Can I get you a coffee?" 

"Sure, Steve. I'd like that." 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

"So," They are both laughing across the table through sips of coffee and Steve's hand has now glided across half the table. “Natasha legit kicks the guy in the crotch. He drops my watch and runs away crying, I shit you not." 

"You let her kick that guy in the _junk?"_

"Number one. He did grope her. Twice. Number two. You'll see. When you meet Nat, she's kind of an unconquered force to be reckoned with." 

"I'm meeting your friends now?" Bucky suddenly became semi-serious as the laugh left his eyes and he picked at the sticker on the coffee cup. 

"If you'd like to." Steve readjusted his place in his seat, sitting up straighter. "I haven't dated in a really _really_ long time. And I'm not quite sure I remember what the rules are. Is that moving too quickly?" 

“Depends.” Bucky shoots a coy smile across the table and leans forward, placing his left hand on the table for the first time. “Does this bother you?” 

Steve surveys the hand and it looks odd. Steve quickly realizes that Bucky has a prosthetic hand. His hand is shiny and smooth as he taps his fingers against the table. It doesn't even look latex or plastic, and he suddenly wonders how it works but beats back the urge to reach out and touch it. Steve instead shrugs and smiles, leaning back in his chair to make his best attempt at a smooth attitude. 

“Why would that bother me?” 

Bucky shrugged. “Bothers some people.”

“I'm _not_ some people.” 

“That's fairly obvious.” Steve could see the blush rushing to Bucky's face as he looked toward the window and threw his right arm across the back of the cushion. 

“Well, no. It doesn't bother me.” 

“Mr. Rogers, you are officially one of the first of few people not to run when I showed them this.” Bucky quickly pulled it off the table and tucked it back into his hoodie pocket. 

“Why would I run? It's not a problem.” Steve ran his fingers through his hair and eyed Bucky curiously. “Did it happen in the war? Is that why you wouldn't tell me about it?” 

“Yes it happened in the war, but no. That's not why I won't tell you about it.”

“I was there, too.” 

“In the Army?” 

“Yeah. 107th.” 

“I was in the 96th! _De oppresso liber!”_

Their raised voices caught some attention as they smiled and laughed, but they didn't care. 

“You still tight with your guys?” 

“Um-” Steve shyed instantly, dropping his hands to his lap to fiddle with them. “N-no. I'm not. My ex was a part of our squad. They all took his side when we split.” 

Bucky leaned in, sharing the space of the table as he clasped his coffee cup, taking a sip. 

“Why'd you break up?” 

“It's a long story.” 

“I've got time.” Bucky lifted his sparkling blue eyes to Steve’s and suddenly Steve felt the floodgates open. 

“Look- I just-” Steve shoved his fingers into the corner of his eyes and attempted to collect himself, taking a deep breath. “it was one time and it was stupid, but I deserved it and I just-” 

“Steve, cut it out. It's okay if you can't talk about it.” 

“N-no, it's not that it's just…” he looked up with watery eyes, trying to find the nearest exit without appearing too anxious. “I've gotta go.” he stood up and began to collect his things frantically. “I thought I was ready, and so did Bruce but I'm just not sure about- I'm just, I'm gonna go.” 

And Steve walked out without so much as a backward glance. 

What the hell just happened?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Natasha teaches Russian 101- The russian that Natasha speaks is in asterisks. (*) “Pree-vette” is the rough english pronunciation of “приветствие” which is a very formal hello. Now, her and Rogers aren’t formal, but due to Natasha’s occupation (whatever the hell that is.) it forces her to be more formal. So it’s more out of habit. 
> 
> Same for “Ura.” It’s the pronunciation for “Ypa.” Which means cheers.


	2. The One with the Fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky seethes and Steve gets some bad luck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, yeah, I know. I said over and over and over again that I'd post on Fridays. But it's Mother's Day, I'm a mom, this is my Mother's Day gift to me. Hooray! Happy Mother's Day to all the Mommas out there, rather it be to human-like gremlins, floofballs or houseplants. 
> 
> I should also mention that this story is already written up to chapter 21 (with the addition of a couple of bonus chapters I have planned, cause ya'll are the bomb) and I'm simply posting once a week to space everything out for you. This is for all those "I don't read WIP" readers. I'm lookin' at you, guys. 
> 
> Enjoy, guys! Remember to SUBSCRIBE, COMMENT, & KUDOS cause THE MORE YOU INSPIRE ME, THE MORE I WRITE. WORK ME LIKE A WORKHORSE, PEEPS.
> 
> Also, a special thanks again to Gravesecret (did the artwork in the last chapter), to whose tumblr post helped me reach a whole new audience. You're the best! :)

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 02/25 (The One with the Fight) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

The drive back to Blue’s Garage was an infuriating one and Bucky beat the steering wheel only about half the ride. He turned up the music and tried to block out his brain replaying the conversation over and over again. Steve's hurt face as he packed up and left. Is it something he did? Something he said? Was it his arm? 

Whatever the fuck it was, he was pissed. If he ever saw Steve again he would probably demand an answer and punch him in the jaw. 

No, no he wouldn't. He's not mad at Steve. He knows that. He's pissed, but he was more pissed at himself for fucking up the first first date he’d had since he'd been home that had the potential of turning into something real. 

He made it back to the garage in one piece (barely) and parked the truck across two spaces like an asshole. He slammed the tow-truck door shut and sauntered inside, finding his sister nursing her baby girl, his niece, Jessica. 

“How'd it go?” She repositioned Jessie in her arms. 

Bucky turned toward the log book and signed himself in, gritting his teeth. 

“Fine.” He barked, opening his phone to check his instant messages. Sighing when there were none. 

“You gonna see him again?” Rebecca’s arm twitched with the movement of her baby, trying to relatch. 

“If I ever see him again, I'll be surprised.” He took a seat beside his sister, flipped on his radio, and turned to her and told her the story of how the date went. She gave a shocked look, but kept her mouth shut. Rebecca wasn’t all about drama and knew that Bucky felt bad enough, so she quickly let it go.“Where’s Big Blue?” 

“He’s around here somewhere. I wanna thank you for helping us out, Buck. Being in the garage and towing business is tough when you’re two guys short and just had a baby.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” Bucky sighed and ran his hand through his hair. 

“Big Blue” was not big at all, and as far as attraction goes, let’s just say that Buck was proud of his little sister for picking a good one. Blue sauntered in from the back, wiping the grease from his hands with a dirty rag. 

“Hey, Barnes!” The brunette, Ryan “Big Blue” Blue, waved in as he walked toward him. “You ready for a job?” 

“That’s why I’m here, sir.” 

“Knock off the sir shit, Barnes. I’m your brother-in-law.” Ryan tussled Bucky’s hair in a joking manner, forcing Bucky to smile with him. “And you're doing me a favor by being here. Remember?”

“Yeah, ‘M ready.” Bucky smirked and picked up his phone, quickly checking his notifications. “What’cha got?” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Bucky knew this part of Brooklyn well, but not _this_ well. He was three blocks away from where he was supposed to be, but with all the one-way streets, he was so flipping lost. He asked a few pedestrians where he was, and they gave him directions to the job. 

He made a right onto the street he was supposed to be on and he finally let out an exhausted breath. As he pulled up to the driver in trouble, he realized that today…. Yeah, today was the worst day of his life. 

Steve Rogers stood breathless beside his leaning motorcycle, wiping the sweat from his eyes. He peered up at the truck and put his arms out, smiling. 

“You’re late!” Steve walks over to greet him and the moment Steve recognizes him, Bucky instantly knows. Steve stops in his tracks and crosses his arms across his chest halfway across the street, grease getting all over his shirt. “So, you’re a truck driver, huh?” 

“Not by trade.” Bucky walked passed Steve and approached the bike, shaking his head at the mess before him. “Let me guess. You’re _not_ a mechanic.” 

“Ummm…” Steve wipes his hand across his forehead, smudging grease across it. Bucky stifles his chuckle and reminds himself to remain stoic and professional. He’s also supposed to be pissed at this guy. “No. I’ve gotta say, I have no idea what I’m doing.” 

“It shows.” Bucky examines the bike, but to be honest, it’s european. He has no idea what he’s doing either. “Let’s get it on the truck and take it back to Blue’s.” 

“I’ll walk it back. It’s only…” 

“Twenty blocks?” Bucky offers, standing the bike up. The mirror falls off, as well as the tailpipe.

Steve worried his lip between his teeth, weighing the pros and cons of walking twenty blocks with his broken and spewing baby versus the sure-to-be awkward truck ride back to the garage. Steve sighed audibly, hiding his blush. 

“Need any help?” 

“Just get in the truck, Steve.” 

And Steve does. And he does _not_ pout. 

“What the hell am I supposed to do with this?” Bucky yells at no one in particular as he rigs the bike to the truck bed. _“Just help out, Buck.”_ He mocks his sister. _“Just a couple of runs a few days a week. Nothing bad will happen.”_ He threads the chain into the wheel of the bike, pulling it taunt. “My fuckin’ ass nothing bad will happen, Becs. Oh, you so owe me. So, _so,_ owe me.” 

The ride back was just as awkward as they thought it would be, but Bucky was proud of the nonchalant attitude he kept up. 

“So,” Steve smacked his lips and relaxed a bit as they pulled away from the first series of red lights. “Truck driver, huh?” 

“Just- just stop, Steve. You don’t have to do that.” 

“Do what?” Steve sat up and glared at Bucky. “Try to make this as copeable as possible?” 

“Copeable? Copeable was never having to see you again. Not _not_ seeing you two hours after you walked out on our first date.” Bucky slammed his hands against the steering wheel as they pulled up to a stop, shooting a glare at Steve so eerie, he thought Steve would melt into the seat. 

“First date? I thought it was just coffee.” 

“It-” Bucky relaxed and sighed. “It was just coffee. But I thought, you know, maybe you were gonna give me a chance.” 

“Bucky, this has nothing to do with you. This is all me. And Bruce-”

“Who the hell is this Bruce and why the hell do you keep bringin’ him up? He your ex?”

“What? No!” Steve placated Bucky with open palms before thinking better of it and placing them on his lap. “He’s my therapist.” 

“You’re in therapy?” 

“Yeah, Buck. I’m in therapy. You gonna make something of it?” 

“N-no. It’s just-” Bucky didn’t know how to finish that sentence. 

“Just what? Don’t wanna date the loser that needs therapy to sleep at night?” 

“That’s the _last_ reason I wouldn’t date you.” 

“Oh yeah? And what’s the first?” 

“Probably the fact that you walked out on our **_first_** date!” Bucky crossed his arms across his chest and attempted to calm himself, finding it difficult. 

“Fair enough.” Steve turned his attention back out into the windshield, hiding his embarrassment. 

The truck cab was silent and a calm washed over both of them as they pulled away from their stop. Blue’s was in their eyesight and Bucky sighed. 

“I’m in therapy, too. Group therapy. But still.” Bucky’s eyes focused on the road, never leaving the windshield. “I get it.”

“Sam Wilson?” 

“Yeah. How’d you know?” 

“He’s the only group therapist in New York that specializes in Overseas Army.” Steve huffed half a laugh. “And he’s a friend.”

“Mine, too.” 

Steve pouted as they pulled up to the garage and Bucky parked, not reaching for the handle of the truck-door. Steve was very unsure of his emotions right now and wished he could freeze time to call Nat, or Bruce or anyone, to ask what he should do. 

“I’m sorry for walking out.” 

“No, Steve,” Bucky threw the door open and got out. “I don’t think you are.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look for another chapter this Friday, guys! Things are heating up.
> 
> (Edit: for some odd reason, Ao3 isn't letting me reply to your comments! But I see them! And I love you guys. You're gonna make me cry! Thanks for reading/commenting and I'll see you this Friday! ;) I'll answer ASAP.)


	3. Nina Calls 911

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What it says on the tin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is pretty short, so I've decided that I'm going to post chapter 4 today, too! Yay! 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy and remember, kudo, comments and opinions are GREATLY appreciated!

✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 03/25 (Nina calls 911) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

 

“‘S gonna be about three days to get all the parts on and fix your bike, Mr. Rogers.” Blue slicked his hair back in the heat of the garage, blotting at his forehead with a bandana. 

“Just not my day, is it?” Steve sucked his lip in and offered an audible sigh, raising his palm and shoving it into his eye. He supposed he could work from home, being an architect had its perks that way. But how would he get home?

“Want me to take you home?” Bucky spoke from across the room quietly, crossing his legs over another. 

“You really don’t have to.” Steve felt shy, dropping his gaze from the floor to the brunette across from him. “I can walk. Or bus. Doesn’t matter to me.” 

Bucky picked up the clipboard and surveyed the paperwork that Steve had filled out, looking for an address. 

“You live almost twenty miles away!” 

“Nothing I haven’t done before.” 

The silent agreement between the two ex-soldiers was tense, but the second Rebecca noticed it, she rolled her eyes. 

“Mr. Rogers, it would be bad customer service if my brother did anything less than drive you home, no matter what happened between you two. Please...” She rocked her baby in her arms and sat beside him. “Let him take you.” 

Steve sighed and watched the baby coo and quiet, slowly closing her eyes. 

“Fine.” 

Rebecca let out a quiet and unanimated victory screech, trying not to wake her sleeping baby. Bucky walked to her and she handed him the keys, waiting until Steve was out of earshot to whisper, “You owe me, little sis.” 

She mouthed back, _“Be nice. I like this one.”_

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“After this red light, you take a left down Main Ave.” 

“Yeah, yeah. I know where I’m goin’.” 

The soundess strain between them had been difficult to uphold for both of them, unsure of how to act around each other. Were they on good terms again? Would Bucky drop Steve off and message him instead? Where the hell did this day leave them? Bucky wasn’t sure of one thing, and that was whether or not he would be there when Steve came to pick up his bike. 

Bucky lost his train of thought when they turned onto Main, the entrance blocked by three fire engines and two ambulances. Steve’s expression took on one of horror as they approached slowly, and Bucky found a place to park that was close enough to walk. 

They both got out of the truck and approached the police officer guarding the caution tape, holding a clipboard. 

“Hello, sir?” Steve walked cautiously, an arm span away from the officer. 

“Please continue with your day, sir. Nothing to see here.” 

Bucky looked up at the apartment building and wiped the sweat off his forehead. Thick, black, foggy fumes billowed out of the side of the building and Steve began to panic. The fire appeared to be out, but the side of the building was scorched black. 

“Is my apartment on fire?” 

“Do you live in this building, sir?” 

“Yes, officer.” 

“Name?” 

“Rogers, Steven, sir.” 

The policeman’s eyes scanned down the page as he traced his eyesight with his fingertip. “You’re in four-nineteen?” 

“Yes, sir.”

“No, Rogers. Your apartment is **not** on fire. However, your neighbor in four-twenny’s is.” 

Steve’s face sullened and narrowed, his eyes gazing to the concrete. 

“Is Nina okay?” 

“No casualties yet. Still fishing on the fifth floor, though.” 

“Is everyone out?” 

Bucky sat back, watching this happen and if he didn’t know better, he would have swore that Steve was preparing to run in and help look for survivors. Bucky would be lying if he said he wasn’t suddenly gearing up with him, his nerves on end and itching to help.

A man closer to the scene gave the officer a thumbs up and he looked up from the clipboard holding up one finger. He clicked into his radio and leaned his head in. 

“Fire at Main Ave, confirmed. No casualties. Over.” 

Steve looked both terrified and relieved. Bucky felt his bones settle as he tucked his hands further into his hoodie pockets, attempting to relax. 

“Well, shit.” Steve glossed his hand over his forehead, removing the remnants of grease that remained. “Guess I’ll need a place to stay tonight, huh?” 

Bucky could have lied and said that he knew that Steve was asking the police officer, but the quick sideways glance he received told him he might have meant otherwise. 

“Yes, sir.” The officer confirmed. “Probably be a few days before we can clear all this damage out. We have your number. We’ll call you in twenny-four hours. Have a good day.” and that was it. He walked away. 

Steve felt his knees buckling, attempting to register all of his belongings so that he could remember if he’d lost anything when he went in. 

Today was _really_ not Steve’s day. 

“It’s just stuff.” Bucky finally offered, waving his hands forward and grasping ahold of Steve’s forearm, leading his stiff form to the truck. “Let’s go blow off some steam.”


	4. Skee-Ball and Sleazeballs

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 04/25 (Skee-Ball and Sleazeballs) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

 

The Full Circle bar was a nice quiet place tucked off in the middle of Brooklyn. They had cheap domesticated beer and three skee-ball tables. Enough bar stools to go around. This wasn’t one of Bucky’s particular haunts, but back in the day, if he wanted to get laid, he’d show off his skee-ball skills and win a free beer. Sans arm, he doubts if he could beat his particular high score, but right now it’s just about the closest place with alcohol. 

They strolled into the bar and chose one of many seats that were together, flashing their IDs to the bartender. He had an old bar towel slung around his shoulder and his scruffy chin stuck out over the bar. 

“What can I get you?” 

“Jack. Neat.” Steve sighed, shoving his ID back into his wallet as he straddled the stool. 

The bartender glanced at Bucky when all he did was hold up two fingers, and the older man rushed away. Bucky sat beside Steve to his left, placing his right hand on Steve’s shoulder blade. 

“It’s only stuff, man.” Bucky suddenly felt more connected to this man, aside from their clashing this morning. He could even consider being his friend. But even with all the bad shit that’s happened, he could say his life had improved since he met him. He wanted to console him and listen to his stories, know him and hear his laugh again. Bucky shook away his thoughts and realized that Steve had looked up at him and was waiting for him to finish his sentence. Because his hand was still on Steve’s shoulder. “You don’t even know if you lost anything yet.” 

“No, I’m not upset about the stuff.” Steve finally offered, the first time he’d really talked since they left the burning apartment complex. “What if I had been there? If I hadn’t met you and walked out, If my bike hadn’t broke down and it wasn’t you that picked me up, I’d have been asleep. In the apartment. It’s like fate... or something.” 

“Didn’t they say it was the neighbor’s that caught fire? Near death experience, much?” 

The bartender came back with their drinks and before they even left his fingers, Steve was nabbing it up and tossing it back. 

“Can I have two more, please?” Steve gruffed through clenched teeth. 

Bucky pulled his credit card out and handed it to the gentleman.

“Open a tab. Two more for me, too.” 

“You paying for him, too?” The Bartender motioned to Steve, who looked up at Bucky in horror.

“You _can’t.”_ Steve half-whined. 

“It’s the least I can do, considering what hell you’ve been through today.” 

The bartender took the credit card and wandered to the register, picking up a bottle of Jack and four shot glasses, lining them up in front of the pair. He filled them quickly and smiled, walking away to take another drink order. 

“I didn’t need you to do that.” Steve shoots his first shot, a look of pleased discomfort spreading across his face.

“I know.” 

“Probably don’t deserve it, either.” Steve filled and swirled the second glass between his fingers. 

“Do me a favor? Don’t tell me how to spend my money.” Bucky felt a smile creep up his face as he rested both his elbows on the wood of the bar.

That was the end of it. Steve was learning that he should know better than to fight Bucky’s vastly stubborn attitude. He sighed instead.

“I had such high hopes about today, Buck. Talking to you last night, seeing you, and this morning when you were actually you…” He slammed his second shot back and Bucky’s still remained untouched on the wooden flat-top. 

“I know how you feel.” Because he did. He really, _really_ did. He wanted today to work, too. “So, what happened then, huh? Why’d you leave?” Bucky’s brows furrowed as he finally touched his first shot, taking it back with ungraceful features. 

Steve placed his hand on the back of his neck and rubbed, his face gliding into the bar. 

“I don’t know.” He mumbled a half-whine, his voice smooth and high.

“I’m starting to get the feeling that you’re a pretty bad liar, Steve.” Bucky felt looser after the whiskey hit his stomach and he peered down to Steve’s crumpled frame. “What’s the real reason? No judgements here.” 

“Because.. Look at you.” Steve lifted his head up from the bar, eyes glistening and glanced at the brunette as Bucky filled their drinks. “You’re perfect.” 

Bucky could **not** believe his ears. He lifted up his left arm off the bar and showed it to Steve. 

“Hello? Some assembly required?” 

For the first time all night, Bucky got to watch Steve smile. His cheeks lifted and his perfect teeth came to view. 

“That, too. And… what happened to me? And my ex? And if I can't even talk about it? What’s the point of opening up to someone when you’re still reeling from your ex? It’s been two years, but I just thought… I didn’t want to screw up a potential relationship with someone like…” Steve gestured to all of Bucky. “-you. Not if I wasn’t ready.” 

Bucky laid his right hand down flat on Steve’s left bicep. 

“You can’t possibly screw me up worse than I already am. Trust me. I’ve got exes, too.” Bucky offered a light smile, and he took another shot. 

“I don’t think you’ve got this kind of ex.” 

Bucky’s smile turned into a coy smirk as he gripped the hem of his black t-shirt, unabashedly showing off his abdomen. Along the right side of his six pack was a lateral scar about four inches long. 

“Gregory. When I broke up with him, he stabbed me. Twenty-six stitches.” 

“Oh, this is a game now?” Steve laughed as he nodded, taking his remaining shot. He thrusted his fingers into his hair and lifted back the hairline, revealing a two inch scar that shifted into his part. “Kyle. Dated three months before he told me he’d knocked up his baby mama. I tried to leave, he threw my head into a mirror.” 

Bucky snicked, putting his right elbow into Steve’s view. There was a two inch scar across the rough part of it. “Anthony. Tried to kill me with scissors.” 

Steve stopped. He thrusted his hand into the air and showed Bucky the back of it, lining the 6 inch scar with a finger on his other hand. “Brock. When he wasn’t using my ribs for punching bags, I was sleeping with another guy to get back at him. He sent my friends after me. Fought off three of them before…” Steve seemed lost in his memory before his eyes briefly connected with Buck’s. “Let’s just say, the guy I was sleeping with is lucky he can walk.” 

Bucky’s face became stone cold as he took another shot. 

“Is Brock the ex you were talking about earlier?” 

Steve stared into his shot glass like it would offer him an answer to that question. 

“Yeah. That’s the last one.” 

“Fuck.” And it clicked. Why Steve walked out and why he was so nervous online last night. Steve had been in an abusive relationship and he most likely wasn’t in therapy for the things that happened overseas like he was. He was in therapy for this douchebag. That’s why he walked out this morning. Steve was scared. Bucky’s fists tightened and his teeth clenched as he thought about revenge for something he wasn’t personally involved in. A sense of nurturing in Bucky kicked in for this man that sat beside him, his life in shambles. He suddenly felt bad for giving him a hard time earlier that day, and decided he wanted nothing more than to worm his way into this Steve’s affections. 

Steve glanced at the scar and watched Bucky’s features change and soften. “I like that one though. Daily reminder to keep away from douchebags.” 

“Is _that_ why you walked out on our date this morning?” Bucky was half-joking to lighten the mood, but by the way Steve suddenly looked at him, he knew it wasn’t a joke. 

A pale hand touched Steve’s shoulder and tried for force him to turn. An older man with salt and pepper hair came into Bucky’s view as he tapped on Steve’s shoulder. 

“You’re American Dream, right?” The man shoved himself into Steve’s personal space and he watched Steve stand up to avoid him, backing up and crowding Bucky’s space. Bucky stood to avoid being stepped on and the man came into full view. He was the same height as the pair, but he’d been the gym a little more often. (and looked like he ate his daily dose of ‘roids for breakfast.)

“N-no, I think you’ve got the wrong guy.” Steve stammered, obviously uncomfortable.

“No!” The stranger bellowed, his drink spilling onto the floor and the tip of Steve’s boot. “I’m sure of it! I sent you a PM last night?” Bucky could smell the vodka on this guy’s breath as he leaned in in a faux-whisper. “I’m Got_Cock!” 

“That’s nice, sir, but I-I think you’re mistaken.” Steve remained quiet, yet stern and Bucky watched closely. 

_“I’m_ mistaken?” The joyous smile on the man’s face grew cold. “I’m not mistaken. You’re one of the hottest people I’ve ever seen and I’m not leaving here until I at least get a blowie.” The man extended his reach around Steve and swatted him on the ass, giving him a wink. 

Bucky’s blood boiled and his fist curled tight, ready to cock back and punch this beefy barfly. He went to open his mouth when Steve’s back suddenly stood ramrod straight, and he puffed his chest out. 

“I don't know who the hell you think you are, _assaulting_ me like that,” Steve pushed his fingers into the meat of this dude's chest. “but if I were you, I'd take a step back and walk away.” 

The guy stood up taller, balanced on the tips of his toes, inches from Steve's face. 

“You gonna make me?” 

“No.” Bucky spoke for the first time, and it was half growl. Steve was bigger than him, but Bucky was scarier. “But I will.” 

The guy noisily inhaled, surveying his options as his eyesight bounced between the two of them. The bartenders were beginning to take notice of the commotion, and the guy finally backed off. 

“Few too many vodkas.” The guy sputtered, embarrassed. “Makes me bold.” 

“Be bold somewhere else.” Bucky spat as he returned to his stool. The douchebag weaved his way back to his seat without so much as a second glance back.

They returned to their seats and attempted to cool off, both holding up their shot glasses and clinking them together. 

“Welcome to the dating world, I guess. Hell of a first day.” Steve sighed before he put the glass to his lips, washing the amber liquid down. 

Bucky took his shot as he attempted to stifle his laughter, waving over to the bartender. When he arrived, Bucky tapped on the bar. “Might want to cut him off.” Bucky pointed to Mr. Got_Cock across the bar and the bartender looked, giving him a thumbs up. As if on cue, the strange man fell backwards. “And my tab, please.” 

The bartender walked away and Steve looked up at Bucky, glassy eyed. The blonde shoved his hand into his finger-length hair and sighed. 

“I gotta call Nat. See if I can crash at her house tonight. Mind if I step outside a sec?” 

Bucky almost told him to forget it, stay at his place, but he remembered the state of his apartment and thought better of it. “Not at all.”


	5. Bucky, The Adorable Man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Follow me on Tumblr @ WhoaEasyTiger0124 for Chapter Update News and random, meaningless shenanigans involving your two favorite super soldiers. <3
> 
> Comments, Kudos, Bookmarks and opinions are EXTREMELY welcome. I love talking with you guys about my work and I'm ELATED you guys are enjoying reading it as much as I loved writing it. If you don't feel comfortable commenting here for some reason, feel free to contact me via any other social media site! My Tumblr is listed above, my instagram is WhoaEasyTiger0124, or you can just slide into my PM's here. ;) 
> 
> Love you guys!

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 05/25 (Bucky, The Adorable Man) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

Steve stepped outside into the cooling summer night air and pulled out his smartphone, dialing Nat’s number. It rang a few times before going to voicemail. Steve hung up and tried again. Three rings later, he heard his best friend’s groggy voice through the speaker. 

_“Da?”_

“Hey Nat.” 

“Rogers, it’s midnight and I have... a few guests. Can I call you back?” Steve heard a quiet female voice moan in the background, which was quickly silenced, assuming by his friend. 

“Nat, I need you.” 

“Oh shit.” Steve heard her shuffling and a door closing behind her. “What’s up? Was it your date? Did he hurt you? Want me to kick his ass?” 

“N-no, Natasha, but thank you. It-It-uh, didn’t go so well? We got into this fight and I left, and my bike broke down and he was the driver, and we kept fighting but I guess we’re on like good terms now? You know what, it’s a long story. Anyway, my apartment caught fire and I need a place to crash tonight.” 

“During your fight he _lit_ your _apartment_ on _fire?”_

“N-No! Natasha, _Jesus._ He’s actually a really sweet guy and we’re getting along now. It’s just- ugh- I’ll explain when I get there.” He shoved his fingertips lightly into his eyelids. Good _god,_ did this woman have great techniques for extracting information from him. 

“Okay, Steve.. I can kick them out. We can have a bottle of wine and talk about your shitty day. Where are you now?” 

“W-with Bucky?” 

“Still? It’s so late already. Wait... as in Just Bucky? I’m guessing, not a Catfish?” 

“Yes, still and definitely not.” 

“Like, on a date?” 

Steve blushed and looked around on the empty streets, cars passing through the intersection. He made sure he wasn't being eavesdropped on and waited a moment, expecting someone to walk around the corner and judge him for his answer. 

“Kinda? He defended my honor, bought the booze...” 

“Do you like him?” 

“I mean…” Steve huffed a deep breath. “I-I do, Natasha, it’s just...complicated?” 

“Uncomplicate it.” She interrupted when he was quiet for too long. “Did he ask you to stay with him?” 

“N-No, but-”

“Steven Grant Rogers, I am so disappointed in you. You say he’s a sweet guy and you need a place to stay. If you don't feel endangered, you sleep with him, Rogers. You hear me? You have sex with that adorable man. If you need me, I'm here. But you need to get laid. Have a good night.” 

And she hung up. 

“What the hell just happened?” Steve whispered to his phone as it flashed “Call Ended” back at him. 

Steve sauntered back in with a confused look on his face. Bucky had his back to the bar and swung his keys around his finger. They made the walk outside and reached the truck, climbing into the front seat. 

“So, am I taking you to Nat’s?”

“She said no.”

“Wow," Bucky breathed. "you really do need new friends.” Bucky started the truck and turned the A/C on low, shoving his left hand into his hoodie pocket out of habit.

“It’s not like that. She would if she could but,-” Steve stopped and Nat’s last comment echoed in his head. Maybe he should take her advice for once. It had been two years since he had sex. But he still felt like he didn’t want to screw anything up with Bucky. He seemed like a pretty great guy. “She has guests.” 

“Didn’t want to invite a party crasher?” Bucky peered over into Steve’s questioning face, finding he liked the way the streetlight highlighted Steve’s features. 

“It’s not the kind of party you invite people to. Not friends, anyway.” 

“Oh.” Bucky rubbed his beard and thought about it. Not friends? _“Oh.”_

“Yeah, I need new friends.” The smile that Steve offered was legitimate, and he knew that Steve had no intentions of exchanging Nat for anyone or anything. Even if orgies were weekly occurrences.

“Come back to my place.” Simple, soft and gentle, Bucky placed his right hand along the slick scar of Steve’s hand. “I won’t try anything funny. I promise.” Bucky shrugged, his demeanor collected and cool. “I’ll even sleep on the couch if you want.” 

“I could stay in a hotel. I don’t want to put you out.”

“I’m not dropping you off in a hotel in this condition.” 

“I’m not even drunk!” 

“That’s not what I was talking about.” Bucky shifted the truck into reverse and began to pull out of the parking space, leaning into Steve’s space to see where he was going out the back window. “You had a shitty and probably anxiety-ridden morning, followed by your bike breaking down, finally followed by your apartment catching on fire. Top that with being sexually assaulted in a bar? You’re in no condition to be alone.” Bucky halted the truck immediately in the middle of the empty street and stared at Steve. “I don’t wanna force you into anything. You don’t wanna come? That’s cool. I’ll drop you off at a hotel. But if you just come to my place, it’ll save you a couple hundred. Besides, you’ll see for yourself I’m not some balloon-crazed maniac and have absolutely no cats in sight.” 

Steve looked as if he we weighing his options as Bucky held his breath.

“Got an extra toothbrush?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :3


	6. Story Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Animosity and palpable tension at it's finest. :)

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 06/25 (Story Time) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

They ventured into a part of Brooklyn that Steve hadn’t been to in awhile, and they parked the truck at a parking lot across from a Barber shop. Apparently Bucky lived above it, because he pulled the fire escape down and looked at Steve, knowingly. 

“I’m _not_ squatting.” Bucky flashed him a smile before clutching on to the rung one-handed, pulling himself up onto the ladder. Steve shrugged and followed him up three levels of stairs before halting and watched him, perched outside of a closed window. He tugged on the sill and Bucky chuckled nervously as it jammed a few times before it opened. “Sticks sometimes.” 

“You’re sure I’m not helping you break in someplace?” Steve crawled through the window into the blackness behind Bucky as he flipped a lightswitch on. The room opened up to Steve and he had to say that this is not what he was expecting. Based upon the outward appearance of the building, Steve had expected something rather dingy and rundown, but what he saw instead was white walls, simple fixtures and a kitchen table with two chairs. Everything was spotless, but also rather barren and relatively unused. The bedroom was off on the far left, and the main entrance to the apartment was across the room. A large sofa was parked between them. Steve suddenly wondered what Bucky's bedroom looked like. Would it be as barren and unused as the rest of his apartment?

“No, it’s mine. When you go in front, the elevators get stuck sometimes.” Bucky looked around and walked to the fridge, opening the right side. He got out a bottle of water and chucked it at Steve, getting one out for himself and twisting off the cap. He took a cool sip of the water and closed it up, setting it on the kitchen table before stripping the messy hoodie and over-shirt over his head, leaving him in an off-white tank. Steve watched in a trance, breathless, seeing now for the first time that not only was Bucky missing a hand, but the entire left arm was _gone._ Steve inwardly flinched and stood his ground, looking away quickly so he didn’t get caught staring. It decidedly didn’t change the way he’d felt about the man before him, but he shuddered to think about the pain Bucky went through.

“Nice place you’ve got here.” Steve awkwardly walked further in and saw the sofa, facing the fireplace. The rustic fireplace was older and Steve traced his fingers into the mortar between the bricks. “So when you’re not helping your sister, what do you do for a living?” Steve looked around curiously, taking sips of water from the bottle. Bucky stood awkwardly in the kitchen, scratching the back of his neck. 

"Is nothing a good answer?” Steve got a look of Bucky’s slim chest through his tank top as Bucky tossed his shirt in the other hand. His prosthetic was mobile as his fingers clutched the shirt, but this was the first time Steve had seen it longer than a couple of seconds. “I was a sniper in the war.” He paused and Steve watched as Bucky’s face changed from sullen to serious. “Not a whole lot of legit occupations that require laser sight accuracy." He shrugged. "What about you?” 

“I’m a architect.” Steve said proudly as he admired the molding, wanting to bend over to get a closer look, but he’d learned a long time ago that people don’t typically get it when he does that. 

“Holy shit, really?” 

“Yeah, do I not fit the profile?” Steve huffed a laugh as he finally give in and admired the wall, running his hands down it.

“N-no, it’s just..” Bucky gripped the plastic side of his left arm. “Doesn’t that take a long time? To become an architect?” 

“8 years of college.” Steve crossed his arms as he landed on the sofa, holding up his bottle of water and shaking it. “If you wanna get into this, I'm gonna need somethin' stronger.” 

Bucky nodded, walking to the kitchen and opening the cabinet. It was bare, aside from 2 plates, 2 bowls, a bottle of whiskey and 2 cups. He grabbed them up and walked to Steve, setting them down on the table before he sat down beside him, a reasonable and comfortable space between them. He popped the cap and filled both glasses half-way, offering one to Steve. 

“Going to school? Best choice I ever made. The army? Second best.” 

“When did you sign up?” 

“I was eighteen. Fresh out of high school. Spent six years in the army before I got injured and they sent me home.”

Bucky looked at him sideways and he cocked up his head, taking his drink back. 

Steve rucked up his shirt and showed Bucky his skin. 

“One of the scars I didn’t show you.” 

The scar was pure white and it bloomed across his chest in 6 directions, but it was positioned directly over Steve’s heart. Bucky had to stop himself from reaching over and touching. 

“Someone shot you?” 

“Yeah. Never caught the son-of-a-bitch though. 3 blood transfusions, died twice and recovered in about 6 months. The docs said that it was unbelievable. Scared me enough to sign up for school right after that.” Steve lowered his shirt and picked up the glass, gulping it quickly. “What about your arm? You get shot in combat?” 

“No.” Bucky glanced forward, watching his reflection off the television settle and sit back. “We were pinned down, found a tower to shoot the targets. The tower collapsed and... I fell. Lost everything up to the clavicle. ” He lifted his left arm and sat it within Steve’s eyesight. He traced the shapes with his eyesight, wondering how the hell Bucky could move his fingers. “Kind of a boring story really, but that’s the truth. Not the exciting one I tell the kids that stare.” 

“That conversation wasn’t nearly as awkward as I thought it would have been.” Steve’s lips curved in a smile as he begin to shake with laughter. He clapped his hand against Bucky’s back as Bucky joined in. Steve’s smile was contagious. “About that toothbrush?” 

“In the medicine cabinet. But don’t try the hot water. It’s been off for about a month.” 

Steve began to stand as he stopped, looking at Bucky incredulously.

“You don’t have hot water? Is it broken? Is it-”

“It’s _off,_ not broken.” Bucky chuckled as he watched Steve struggle. 

“How do you shower?” Steve stood and threw his arms out.

“Quickly.” Bucky scoffed back, the laugh never leaving his face. “When I said I was out of work, I meant it.” 

“So when you paid for our drinks?” and Steve had _allowed_ Bucky pay for his drinks. He wasn’t concerned that Bucky was out of work, but if he didn’t have the money to pay the gas bill, oh boy, would Steve feel like a dick for accepting his money. Bucky most likely was the kindest person Steve had met in a while, just for being the way he was today. He found he was suddenly very concerned with Bucky’s well being. But he also realized how he’d put Bucky out in a bad way today. _Over and over and over._

“I told you not to worry about it.” 

“How can I not?” Steve thrusted his hand out and anger flared. “I can’t believe I let you do that! I’m such an idiot! You must think I’m some kind of a jerk.” He massaged his forehead with the tips of his fingers.

“Look,” Bucky stood up and faced Steve, chest full with his back straight. Steve eyes snapped to look at Bucky’s squinting face. “I appreciate the worry, but if I’d needed the hot water on, I’d have it on. I have a tendency to only have what I need.” 

“Fine.” Steve pouted, knowing he was defeated when Bucky didn’t look like he was backing down. He could give him this for now. “But next time we go to the bar, _I’m_ buying the drinks.” 

They both stood silently as they realized what Steve had said before Bucky spoke up. 

“Next time, huh?” 

“If-If there is a next time.” 

“Do you want there to be?” Bucky took a step forward, knowing that Steve was walking backwards, quickly approaching the wall behind him. He stopped himself, just out of Steve’s reach. He wasn’t going to press Steve. He had promised not to try anything, after all. But _damn,_ did Steve’s lips look soft.

“If you do.” Bucky watched Steve’s blush rush to his face as he looked from Bucky’s eyes to his lips. 

“As long as you don’t try and walk out after the first drink, I think I’m game.” Bucky’s coy smile lifted.

Steve rolled his eyes and huffed a laugh, their tension temporarily suspended. Bucky wandered into the bedroom, flipping on the light. Steve followed as he pointed to the bathroom. Steve went and opened the cabinet, finding his toothbrush as Steve watched Bucky get something from the closet. Bedsheets and a pillow. Like a routine. Steve found himself wondering if Bucky had done this often enough to earn the old wear on the couch that he noticed earlier.

He turned on the cold water and wet the brush, stealing some toothpaste and getting to work. 

“How long have you been home from the army?” Half a mouthful of toothpaste spilled out, but the question needed to be asked. 

“A year, come July.” Bucky wandered into the living room and Steve followed behind him. Bucky began to make the sofa up with a pillow and a blanket, fluffing it up. 

“What are you doing?” Steve asked, lacing his hands over his chest. He felt his head flying, the whiskey burning in his stomach as he watched Bucky’s arms sway with practiced ease. Like he’d already made up this sofa too many times this month. 

“Setting up the couch so you can have the bed.” Bucky said plainly, staring up at him and not moving. “Said I wouldn’t try nothin’.”

“I don't need the bed. I'm happy on the couch.” 

“I insist.” Bucky let go of the pillow and flopped down on the couch crudely, crossing his arms over another mid-air. As if to prove a point. 

“Seriously, I'm not going to need the bed.” 

Steve's serious tone sunk through Bucky's pleasant demeanor and reality hit him. Steve didn't want the bed because he doesn't _sleep on a bed._ Steve’s weary eyes and polite demeanor faded as Bucky’s face grew distressed. He felt the urge to open up. Well, he’d already shared more with Steve than he had with anyone outside group in over a year. No turnin’ back now. 

“It's the pillows first, right?” Bucky peers at Steve through the half light, attempting to gauge his reactions to such an odd statement, seeing if Steve empathized. He recalled his first few months back, switching from fidgeting on the bed at night, to finally tossing and turning on the couch before dragging the blanket to the ground. “Too soft. Can't get comfortable.” 

“How'd you-?” Steve didn’t finish the question. He didn’t know how. 

“To be honest, I was offering the bed cause as soon as you closed that door, I was gonna migrate to the floor.”

They sat in silence for a little while, absorbing all the new information floating above them. 

Bucky finally picked up the fluffy comforter and the pillow, throwing them in an empty space at Steve's feet. He sat on the floor and picked the blanket up, tucking himself underneath. He offered his open right hand up to Steve like a promise. Steve took it unwaveringly. 

Steve crumbled into Bucky's chest and rested his ear right over Bucky's heart. The sound was soothing to him and Bucky awkwardly rested his arm across Steve's back. Steve took a deep breath in and cleared his throat. 

“I'm really sorry for walking out this morning. Shouldn't have freaked out so soon. I feel like a total idiot.” 

“Yeah? You’re in my arms on the floor of my apartment. I’ve had worse dates.” Bucky lifted his head up enough to see Steve's resting face pressed into his pec. 

“But you-” Steve pressed his face in farther, maybe trying to find the perfect word to describe what Bucky has meant to him by being there for him today. “You make me feel like we could do this every day.” 

“What?” 

“Yeah, I mean, some really bad shit happened to me today and you just… did what you could to make me feel better. That's the kinda guy I'd like to have a first date with.” 

Bucky's smile couldn't have been wider. He felt like an idiot, swooning over the man in his arms. Bucky leaned forward and subtly pressed his lips to the top of Steve's head. 

“Get some sleep, kid. You got a long day ahead of you.” 

Bucky didn't see the smile that spread across Steve's features as he got himself comfortable and rested his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our boys are getting comfyyyyyy! 
> 
> Don't forget to comment, kudo, & tell me how much you like/dislike it! 
> 
> If you subscribe, you'll get a lovely little email telling you when I update every Friday. :) 
> 
> See you guys in June! :*


	7. Bad Guys, Bacon and Bucky Barnes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for posting so late! Adulting got in the way.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 07/25 (Bad Guys, Bacon and Bucky Barnes) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Steve's dream was a lucid one, steel-toed feet kicking his chest and face repeatedly as he called out and fought back, peering across the room at where he was sure his one-night-stand was being given a similar treatment. Steve opened his eyes to look and saw Bucky on the floor instead, eyes cold and angry as he was delivered a sharp kick to the ribs. 

Suddenly, Steve felt himself reach out, blood blocking his eyesight as he pulled himself forward, trying to save Bucky, but he was smelling something. What was that smell? Why did it smell like burning-

...bacon? 

Steve opened his eyes and saw an unfamiliar ceiling as his phone rang in his pocket. He shoved his fist into his eye as the other hand searched the tight pockets of yesterday’s stiff jeans. He found his smartphone and thumbed the screen, sliding the green phone icon over. 

“Hello?” 

“Mr. Rogers?” 

“Speaking.” 

“It’s the fire inspector's department. They’re ready for you to come back and survey the damage to your apartment.” 

“Okay. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” 

Steve dropped the phone and fell back, his head hitting the pillow. He looked to his right and saw Bucky in the kitchen, busying himself with pots and pans. 

“Afternoon, Sleepin’ Beauty.” Bucky pulled a pan off the stove and transferred bacon to a plate. His smirk grew as he connected sights with Steve.

“Afternoon?” 

“It’s 3:30.” Bucky picked up both plates and set them on the table, two steaming mugs of coffee balanced between his fingers. He motioned for Steve to follow and he did, extremely impressed with the spread before him. He rubbed his eyes and took hold of the coffee, shuffling his hair into something at least passable.

They ate quietly and happily, and Steve smiled around his food. 

“Gonna be honest. This is the first time someone’s made me breakfast in a long time. Especially someone I slept with.” The statement was joking but the shock hit Bucky mid-bite and he had to stifle the half-choke sound that his throat made. But still, Steve continued. “You’re actually the only person I’ve ever just _slept_ with.” 

“I promised I wouldn’t trying anything, didn’t I?” His forced his hands back and gestured to his apartment. “And look. No cats.” He took a bite of his eggs and chewed quietly. Steve blushed and smiled sweetly. “Don’t fall for me yet, Rogers. Not ‘til you’ve tasted my Eggs Benedict.” The comment was supposed to be light and cocky, but it fell heavy in the air. Bucky quickly decided before they got into another deep heart-breaking conversation, he should probably change the subject. “Am I taking you to your apartment?” 

“Actually, I was going to ask you last night, but you fell asleep. I-” Steve stopped and stared at his food, dropping his fork lightly. “I don’t want to be alone when I do this? I have lots of memories there, and if it’s all gone,-” 

“I’ll go.” Bucky said flatly, lifting his coffee cup up to his lips and taking a sip. 

“Are you sure? I mean, your sister-” 

“Becca will understand.” 

“Okay.” Steve sighed a happy relief. “Thank you.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

The apartment is dark and wet as they walk in and Steve’s bedroom is destroyed. Their shoes squish as they walk through, the carpet soaked with inches of water. The walls have licks of scorch marks running up it. Bucky walks around freely, exploring each room while Steve talks to the fire chief. He can intermittently hear them talking, and he knows he can run his fingers across Steve’s desk in his bedroom without getting caught. It’s practically intact, a worn charcoal pencil sitting beside a yellowed piece of cardstock, an idea begging to be created and instead, abandoned. He finds a sketchbook beside it untouched by fire, pleading to be thumbed through. Bucky uses his sniper hearing and listens to Steve pace the living room. No chance of getting caught. He feels shitty even thinking about it, but curiosity wins out as he opens the cover page.

The picturesque view of a park at sunset is stunning, bright pastel colors spreading across the sky. It’s gorgeous, and he memorizes each inch before moving on. He flips through a few more pages, some of modern cement buildings and some of shining, stretching skyscrapers, but one in the very back catches Bucky’s eye in particular. It’s the beginnings of a sketch of Bucky, beautifully etched and shaded, holding up a peace sign. The thing that caught Bucky’s sight first was the truly identical way Steve had captured his eyes, the perfect shade of cerulean blue. Each curve and indent of his skin was there, his hoodie hanging off of his shoulders. Bucky’s half-smile was perfectly drawn, and Bucky realized how much time and devotion Steve had given him before he ever even walked into the coffeeshop. 

He suddenly felt entirely too intrusive as he shut the book, pretending he hadn’t seen it. He heard footsteps down the hall and he quickly focused his attention to the blueprints spread across the walls, tracing his finger down the lateral wall of one of the buildings sketched there. 

“They say they can replace most of it.” Steve’s face appeared in the doorway, leaning against the frame. “Found my sketches, huh?” 

“They’re beautiful.” Bucky glanced across each white piece of paper with beautiful houses tucked deep into the woods. 

“They’re practice. Only one is being built.” Steve walked in and surveyed the walls, using his finger to point at the one next to Bucky’s leaning frame. 

“You should still be proud. These are great.” Bucky rounded Steve to look at another photo, but he found himself focused on the blonde’s wide set shoulders. “Beautiful.” He wasn’t sure if he was talking about the blueprint or the man in front of him, but he couldn’t deny the magnetic pull he felt any longer. He leaned forward and his left hand hovered over Steve’s shoulder blade. He stepped forward and pushed himself into Steve’s space, and Steve didn’t pull away. He brought his left arm around front, resting it on Steve’s pec. 

“I could be true to my word and try to teach you to draw. If you’d still like that?” Steve’s voice hitched as he felt Bucky’s breath on the back of his ear and Bucky’s flesh hand wandered, creeping up his ribcage.

“Absolutely.” Bucky pressed his lips on the strip of flesh that was between Steve’s neck and his shirt. Steve let out a half moan at the contact, his head dipping back to rest on Bucky’s shoulder. Bucky took advantage of the new angle and kissed upwards, his tongue swiping the heated flesh. Steve’s hand reached Bucky’s right along his ribcage and he turned to face him in his arms, eyes blown wide. Their labored breath mingled as Bucky pressed both palms into Steve’s pecs, pinning him to the wall. Steve licked his lips and blinked slowly, watching Bucky’s patience crumble. His eyesight continued to bounce from Bucky’s piercing blue eyes and his full lips; so _so_ close to his. 

“Can I-?” 

_“Yes.”_

Bucky surged forward and threaded his fingers into Steve’s scalp, they were so close, but they hear the fire chief fumble down the hall. They forced themselves apart and Bucky sat on the corner of the bed while Steve remained where he was. Bucky thrusted his hand into his pocket, attempting to look natural and not at all like he was internally screaming. 

“You all packed up here?” The chief bellowed, appearing in the doorway. “Gotta close up.” 

“Mmm, yeah.” Steve looked around the room hiding his blush, grabbing his sketch pad off the desk. He tucked it under his arm. The chief walked away and Steve peered at Bucky, noticing that he was in the same disheveled state that he was. “Gotta call Nat. To be continued?”

“Nat? For what?” 

“See if I can stay at her place. Chief out there thinks they won’t have it fixed for three days.” 

“Oh.” Bucky told himself not to push, he’d known about Steve’s past now and no matter how much he wanted Steve to stay with him instead, he couldn’t make that decision for him. “Okay.” 

Steve excused himself to the living room and pulled his phone out, thumbing in Nat’s number. 

“Nat?” 

“Already got the spare room at the second apartment set up for ya. I’ve been here since noon.” Nat bristled, sounding bored. “Pizza will be here in an hour. I have ice cream in the fridge and a bottle of red chilling.” 

“You’re a lifesaver. See you in twenty?” 

“Rogers, one thing.” Natasha’s stern voice was shining through the statement. 

“Anything.” 

“I want to meet Bucky.” 

Steve turned toward the hallway where the brunette was down the hall in his bedroom and smirked, remembering the almost-kiss.

“I don’t think that’ll be a problem.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter coming shortly! 
> 
> Remember to comment, review, kudo and subscribe! So far, I have been so overwhelmed with happiness at how much you guys like my story. :3 keep it comin'!


	8. Ding Dong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve makes an important decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;3

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 08/25 (Ding Dong) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“Out of general curiosity, why does she want to meet me?” Bucky questioned, crossing his arms as they waited in the elevator on the way to Nat’s upscale apartment. Her house by Steve’s was where she stayed mostly, but when she wanted pampered, she’d stay at the apartment complex instead.

“Because she’s my best friend and she’s weird that way.” Steve chuckled and turned toward him. “She was there when we were messaging. Told me that coffee dates were _not_ first dates.”

“They are, too!” Bucky chortled and looked at Steve incredulously.

“Oh yeah? Since when does a first date contain sharing space with hipsters and caffeinated beverages?” Steve shot back.

“The kind that comes with dating people online.” Their conversation wasn't one of anger, but of passionate, stubborn jesting. “I’ll prove it.” 

Steve hits the emergency stop button on the elevator and it came to a jarring hault. Good thing there were two elevators in this building, cause he was sure no one wanted to hear this. 

“Fine.” Steve got closer and his eyes dragged up Bucky’s body, drinking it in. “Prove it.” 

“Plenty of fish? It’s a _dating_ website.” Bucky laughed and resisted the urge to tuck his thumb behind Steve’s ear to pull him closer, connecting the lips to his own that he hadn’t stopped thinking about for an hour now. “I didn't show up to make a friend, and neither did you. It was most definitely a first date.” 

“Let’s agree to disagree.” Steve felt himself stand down, and settle, a giddy laugh rising from his chest. He turned back towards the panel and hit the start button, feeling Bucky’s basking gaze directed at him. 

“You gonna text me later?” Smooth, quiet and questioning, Bucky’s fear of rejection kicking in. 

“I’d like to.”

“Good, I’ll probably be awake.” 

The elevator doors opened straight into a grand hallway with only two doors, one adjacent from the other. Steve rang the doorbell, opened the door and took the lead into Nat’s lavish apartment. 

“Natasha! We’re here!” Steve called out as he turned the corner into the living room, Bucky following carefully on his heels. 

Nat strolled in, readjusting her stark white tanktop and walked towards Bucky with a smooth smile. 

“I’m Natasha. Steve’s best friend.” Her voice was harsh but light, a certain attractive gruffness to it that flowed into Bucky's ears like smooth silk.

“James. But all my friends call me Bucky.” Bucky turned on a bit of charm as he smiled widely, he knew girls loved his dimples. And he loved showing them off.

“You want some wine, Bucky?” 

“Got any whiskey?”

“Steve, marry him.” Nat padded away on light feet across the plush carpet, retrieving her whiskey from the barshelf. Steve could _not_ hide the blush on his face with his palm fast enough.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

“So, you stole a Golf Flag?” Bucky’s cheeks hurt from laughing. “Why?” 

“Too much alcohol.” Steve shrugged. 

“Seemed like a good idea at the time.” Nat continued, slapping a hand on her thigh and holding her drink upright as to not spill it. “Spring break did not look good on us.” 

“Not at all.” Steve nudged Nat as they laughed together. 

“So, that’s how you guys met? College?” 

“No.” Steve continued. “We met in Tampa.”

“Steve.” Nat pressed her shoulder into Steve’s and sipped her drink. “We met in California.” 

“Oh, yeah!” Steve remembered. Bucky seemed confused as he looked on and sipped his drink. He spoke over the brim. “If I told you how we met in California, I’d probably have to kill you.” Steve hissed through his teeth and smiled up at Bucky, pressing his hand into Bucky’s leg. 

“You could try.” Bucky refuted, taking back the rest of his drink. “But I’ve been told I’m pretty hard to kill.” 

“Is that a challenge, Mr. Barnes?” Nat raised her eyebrow at him, a sly smile spreading across her features. 

“More like an invitation.” Bucky set his glass down and smiled wryly. 

“Don’t threaten me with a good time.” Nat shrugged and laughed, the two boys joining her. 

“Do me a favor?” Steve set his glass down. “Tell me beforehand. I’ll film it and we’ll be Youtube famous.” 

“Rogers, don’t you dare.” Nat scoffed. “I don’t want to be a meme.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“I had a great time.” Steve was walking Bucky to the elevators and Nat wasn’t far behind. 

“Me too. Guess I’ll see you when you come pick up your bike, huh?” 

“Y-yeah.” The elevator doors opened and Steve offered a genuine smile. “Get home safe.”

Bucky takes Steve’s hand and swiftly moves in, planting a warm kiss on Steve’s right cheek and pulls away just as quickly. 

And then he disappears behind the closing doors.

Steve’s blush runs hot into his cheeks as he swoons backward, landing on the wall. Nat runs to him and throws her arm over Steve, helping him into the kitchen. “Tell me everything.” 

 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

Bucky  
  
Thank you.  
  
For what?  
  
For making me feel human again.   


= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

Steve filled Nat in on all of the details he could think of, wanting to be as honest as possible. They sipped wine and ate good pizza as Steve had described the best/most _shitfuck_ day he’d had in his life. “We had this really tense moment in the elevator before he left. And he kissed my cheek. So, now you pretty much know everything.” 

“Wow.” 

“Yeah.”

“So you just walked out? Without telling him why?” 

“I spent the night on his floor and you’re still worried that I walked out him?” 

“I mean, have you _seen_ him? Met him? If you don’t go out with him, I might.” 

“I know all that. And I know I made a mistake this morning. But when he even _brought_ Brock up, I just- I panicked. And I kept seeing them punching me over and over and I just- I had to leave.” Steve’s face perked up in a soft smile. “Staying with him last night taught me that Bucky comes with baggage that isn’t dissimilar to mine. And when he took care of me in my worst times, it just made me realize that what happened between Brock and I could all go away someday. Yesterday morning when I woke up, I wasn’t sure if I was ready to try dating again. And now? I think I do. Because... I want to do this… every day. With Bucky.”

**Ding Dong!**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next one is soooo good, you guys. I can't WAIT to get your reactions. ^-^ 
> 
> Hopefully you think I did the boys justice and thank you for all the support I've gotten so far! 
> 
> Remember to kudos, review, comment, etc and you'll make me love you guys even more. <3
> 
> See you next week!


	9. With pillows that smell like you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do you guys expect there to be a summary for each chapter?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy June 8th everyone! Illness has taken a turn in my household so I'm in bed even as I post this. I'm really looking forward to the good words and vibes you guys may have at the end of the next chapter. Bear with me, the juicy bits are a comin'.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 09/25 (With pillows that smell like you) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

 

Bucky honestly didn’t want to leave. And it took everything he had in him to step foot off the elevator and head in the direction of home. His truck sputtered and eventually gave out an unpleasant groan, but it still started when he told it to. 

He peered over in the passenger’s seat beside him and saw Steve’s sketchbook laying there. 

Shit.

“It would be a good reason to go back.” Bucky reasoned with himself, feeling crazy. “ _I don’t want him to think I’m looking for an excuse to see him._ You _are_ looking for an excuse to see him.” Bucky outwardly sighed and jammed the stick into reverse, pulling the truck out of the parking lot. 

When he got home, the blanket was still laid astrew in “that” corner of the living room and Bucky tried not to look at it. He ate an apple while avoiding his gaze at the corner, hopped into a long, cold shower, and sat on the couch in the near-dusk darkness, breaking down and staring at the space they shared less than 24 hours ago. He gave in, abruptly standing and crawling onto the floor, lifting the blankets over him. The pillow smelled different and pleasant, and they certainly didn’t help him sleep. 

Bucky gave up and pulled out his phone, checking his messages. When there were none, he caught scent of the pillow and the beautiful way Steve laughed at his jokes suddenly echoed in his mind. He pulled out his phone and shot a text message to Steve.

Steve Rogers  
  
Thank you.  
  
For what?  
  
For making me feel human again.   


“And _I'm_ an idiot.”

Bucky’s eyes wandered to the table where Steve’s sketchbook sat, and he defied his urge to snoop again. He could recall every detail from earlier, anyway. His thoughts wandered to Steve and he found himself wondering if Steve was missing his possession, probably wanting to finish his drawing of… Would he finish it now that they’d had the day they had? He could only imagine Steve’s embarrassment at his discovery of the sketch. Maybe he should take it back to Steve before he gets worked up about it. 

Bucky stood and grabbed the sketchbook with a huff, walking toward the door of the apartment. 

“What the hell am I doing?” Bucky sighed and stopped, peering at himself in the mirror of the hallway. “3 hours without the guy and you're itching like an addict.” He watched the way his bare chest bloomed red and he pushed the sketchbook down. “Pull yourself together, Barnes. You're not going.” 

Bucky ran his hands through his unruly hair, flattening the top before pulling it back in a bun. He wandered into his bedroom and pulled out a clean shirt, one he liked, the black one with the shirt pocket. He checked his reflection again before practicing a smile, quickly feeling ridiculous and rolling his eyes. 

“I've got to see him again.” Bucky picked the sketchbook up and tucked his lapels down, sighing. “Don't freak him out. I'm just dropping off his sketchbook. Yeah.” Bucky sighed, tugging on a light jacket and walked through the door, growling. “That's not weird.” 

“He'll be okay seeing me again, right?” Bucky made it to the truck quickly, the book tucked under his arm. He cranked the starter and it sputtered back at him. He tried again and no avail. The truck battery was most likely dead. Great. He pounded his faux-wrist into the steering wheel. 

No traffic in sight and certainly no cars he could steal. Not that he would. (Maybe.) Bucky slammed the door shut and glanced back at his apartment, knowing that when he went back inside, the place would still smell like him. 

And he just started walking. 

The sketchbook was tucked into his jacket as he passed street vendors on the sidewalk, mumbling unreasonable excuses as to why he would be showing up on Steve's doorstep, threatening himself that if he can't come up with a good excuse, he'd turn back. Stuck in his ignorance of his surroundings, it had began to rain, and he bumped into a burly street vendor, rushing to get out of it. 

Bucky couldn't feel the rain on his skin, but he looked up to apologize anyway. The moment he saw the single rose by its lonesome in a box on the cart, an idea struck. 

“How much for the rose?” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

“This isn't a good idea.” Bucky whispered to himself as he stood outside Nat's building, the rain drenching his hair and coat. “What if he tells you to screw off?”

Bucky remembered the heated gaze he'd received when he’d kissed Steve’s cheek. 

He needed to feel those lips against his, hold his scarred hand and tell him everything would be alright. He only surrounded himself with things he needed. And he suddenly realized, he _needs_ Steve. 

He left a puddle in the elevator, but he couldn't have cared less. He pulled the sketchbook out from his jacket and held it between his hands, approaching Nat's door. He held his finger out to the doorbell and stopped, taking a deep breath in. He pushed it quickly, no turning back now. 

 

**Ding Dong!**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't forget to comment, review, kudo, etc. If I don't see your reactions, I won't be influenced to write! I love you all so much for your support and don't forget to come hang out with me on my various social media sites for chapter updates and meaningless shenanigans involving your favorite super soldiers.
> 
> Tumblr & Insta: WhoaEasyTiger0124  
> FF: Superwoman0124


	10. The First of Many and Mama Romanov

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 10/25 (The First of Many and Mama Romanov) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

 

“Keep your cool, Rogers.” Steve slammed his face into the peephole again, reaching for the lock. He opened the door to Bucky’s proud standing form, with a single rose sticking out of the pages of Steve’s sketchbook in his hands. 

“Hi.” Bucky looked like he was shaking, hair dripping and messy, his jacket soaked through. The silly smile on his face put Steve at ease. “I came to give you this.” 

Bucky thrusted the sketchbook at Steve. Steve took it gratefully. 

“You’re wet.” 

“I walked.” 

“You walked 30 blocks here in the rain just to give me my sketchbook? And a rose? What’s-”

“Go on a second-first date with me.” 

“B-Bucky, I-” 

“Open the book. On the page the rose is sticking out of.” 

Steve was suddenly horrified, noticing that the rose was in the back half of the book, and he didn't have to open it to know which page it was on. 

He opened it anyway, and pulled the rose out, met with both sets of Bucky’s light blue eyes. His lips were pressed into a tight line by Bucky’s plush ones and Steve groaned at the contact, feeling himself relax for the first time in the last 48 hours. Bucky stepped closer to him as Steve began to kiss back, the back of his head hitting the doorframe. Bucky was smooth and clean, his tongue working in between Steve’s lips. Bucky let out a happy moan as Steve tugged him closer, pulling him in by his lapels. Warm, crisp rainwater dripped all over Steve’s forehead and gathered across their noses, but now that they had tasted each other, there was little that could tear them away. 

Bucky opened his eyes first, pulling away and lowering his forehead to press it against Steve's skin. 

“Is that a yes to the date?” Bucky breathed, the smile working its way to his cheeks.

Steve nodded his reply, breathless and shaking. “Tomorrow? 6:00?” 

“I’ll be here.” 

Bucky released his grip from Steve and he leaned in, kissing Steve’s cheek lightly. He tore himself away from Steve and headed for the elevator, looking back as he waited for the doors to open. 

When they closed, Steve’s jaw hurt from the smile he couldn’t rid himself of.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Tomorrow at 6 came quicker than Steve had expected. He couldn’t go home for a new outfit, so he borrowed some things from Nat’s closet instead. She had quite the collection of clothes from lays long since passed. Hopefully, she had something in Steve’s size. 

When he was satisfied with the dark blue A-cut jeans and Oxford button up in a cornflower blue, he rolled up the sleeves and held them there, looking at his reflection in the mirror. 

Nat walked in and watched Steve watching himself and surrounded his chest with her arms, fixing the lapels of his shirt. 

“You look stunning.” Nat turned Steve towards her, balancing on her tiptoes to kiss Steve’s cheek. She held Steve’s fingers firm in her grip, switching her focus from their entwined hands to Steve’s open face. “I approve of him.” 

“Yeah?” Steve was touched, not knowing until this moment that he desperately needed Natasha’s approval of his choice in dates. “For real?” 

“Yeah.” Nat sniffled a cry. “I can’t even think about that rose stunt without becoming insanely jealous.” She raised their joined hands so she could wipe away a stray tear on her cheek. “If he hurts you, I will kill him.” They laughed. “But I approve.” 

“Thank you, Nat.” The silence that followed contained the absolute elation and thankfulness he felt for his best friend. “For everything.” 

“Don’t thank me yet.” She dropped his hands, smiling and reaching for the floor to retrieve something she’d dropped. “I’m about to embarrass the hell out of you.” 

She opened the bag and pulled out a 6 roll of foil condoms, the smile on her face couldn’t have been more pleased. 

“Do I need to teach you how to use one of these, or do you still remember from high school?” She chuckled. “I know it’s been a while since you’ve used one, I wanted to see if you wanted to compare notes from your sex ed class in the **stone age.”**

“You’re an asshole.” Steve stifled his laugh and ripped the condoms away, tucking them into his back pocket. “I’m only 6 months older than you.” He called to her as she walked away. 

“You’re only as young as you act, Rogers!” She called from the other room where she’d probably spend the evening. “Don’t call me if you’re not coming back! Only if I have to come kick his ass!” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Bucky was nervous for obvious reasons. He’d borrowed a car from Becca and begged her apologies for missing work, but he was right. She’d been very understanding. He picked out semi-nice clothes and called ahead at a local restaurant. He eyed himself in the mirror at 4:45 before slipping into his dark jeans, white tee and black light jacket, slipping his fingerless glove over his left hand. He left his apartment with no hesitation entirely too early, but for the first time in over a year, he wasn’t dreading a first date. 

When he picked Steve up, he’d approached the door unwaveringly, until he was met with Steve’s eyes and all his confidence went out the window. His jaw dropped, but he quickly recovered, sputtering out something that sounded similar to “You ready for this?” 

Steve just smiled sweetly and nodded, shutting the door behind him. 

Bucky held his breath the entire way down the elevator, wanting so badly not to screw this up. He stole glances Steve’s way, idolizing a new part of Steve with every sideways look. He kept trying to open his mouth to say something, but all that came out was; “You look nice.” 

Steve smiled, his blush rising as he glanced up at the floor-reader, shifting to the other foot. “Thank you. You do, too.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Bucky had reserved a booth in the back at the local restaurant that Steve had always wanted to try. They were ushered quickly in and gave their drink orders, sitting side by side in the booth. 

“Fire chief called today.”

“Good news, I hope?”

“With the bad luck I've had in the passed 32 hours? Never.” Steve chuckled and looked away. “Said it's gonna take two weeks. Something about finding smoke damage in the appliances.”

Steve picked up his water glass and held it to his lips. 

“I really liked kissing you.” Bucky said softly staring down at his glass, and Steve spat back into his drink to stop himself from choking. Water ran down his chin and he placed the cup down quickly. “Sorry!” Bucky picked up his napkin and began to dot it against Steve’s chin, his gaze wandering to Steve’s pinpoint focused eyes. 

“I liked kissing you, too.” Steve's eyes were misty and his appearance changed rapidly from laughter to seriousness. 

Bucky was an idiot. This awkward tension was ridiculous and he should just say-

“Screw it.” 

He lightly thrusted his fingers into the space between Steve’s ear and dragged him forward, uniting their lips. Bucky felt like his nerves were on fire as Steve relaxed into the kiss, placing his hand on Bucky’s forearm. Steve kissed back, his lips plush but firm, a silent insistence. Bucky felt his feet lift off the floor as he shifted his tongue to entwine with Steve’s, gentle coaxing with the fingertips in Steve’s hair. Oxygen. Oxygen was a thing they were going to need eventually.

“Can we get the check?” Steve joked as they pulled away. “People are staring.” 

Bucky looked around and saw the stares, but he didn't care. He felt whole. Complete. And _home,_ for the first time since he'd been back in the states. 

“My place?” 

Steve bit his bottom lip and sucked it in, his shy blush shining as he nodded in the half-light. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

Steve paid for their drinks (as promised) and they walked out without another word, arm in arm out to the borrowed SUV. 

The awkwardness they'd felt earlier was replaced by something new, something neither of them could place. It was exciting and scary, but as they shared a heated glance at one another at a red light, they both realized their intentions. Bucky cursed the light for being red. He needed to tear into Steve good and _hard._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :o  
> I don't mean to keep posting cliffhangers, I swear! 
> 
> Don't forget to subscribe to find out next week just how badly Bucky tears into Steve. ;)


	11. A Different First of Many

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bow-chicka-wow-wow!

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 11/25 (A different first of many) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

 

Bucky doesn’t even remember getting to the bedroom. All he knows is it was a fury of kisses and half-huffed moans, stripping each other as soon as they got the window in sight. The rain poured down on them which only encouraged them to strip faster and grind _harder,_ feeding on each other’s warmth. When Bucky’s back hit the bed for the first time, he felt his arm and legs **shake,** never wanting to part their lips for any reason. 

Bucky felt his cock throb as Steve grinded his denim crotch, a deep and surprised inhale forced its way out of his throat. Steve thrusted forward, latching his lips to the sensitive skin under Bucky’s ear. Bucky’s hands flew to Steve’s buttonfly, moving out to arch his neck. He got them down and slipped his hand under the waistband, and the moment his hand came into contact with Steve’s cock, he felt like a changed man. Steve’s cock was velvet soft and wet and smooth and just _everything_ he’s ever wanted. He pressed his left hand into Steve’s throat to pull him up, kissing him hard and jacking him slow. Steve let out a gravel-rough moan through their shared breath. He tugged down his jeans and boxers, never letting Bucky break the contact with his cock. Steve tugged Bucky's jeans down next and crawled back up the expanse of Bucky, lining his dick up with Bucky's cock. He slotted them together and humped up against the bundle of nerves under the head and Bucky let out a low, teeth clenched growl. 

“I’m a little rusty.” Steve scoffed as he kissed Bucky lightly, running Bucky’s slick member across his entrance. “But I’m _clean.”_

“Me too.” Bucky gasped and Steve looked at him with slight shock. “How long since you’ve had-?” 

“2 years.” 

“Good.” Bucky nodded. “I want you to fuck me, then.” 

“Bucky...” All of Steve’s breath was drained from his lungs and he shorted out, crumbling to kiss the path down Bucky’s neck. “I normally- A-are you sure?” 

Bucky had trekked all of Europe with a Springfield strapped to his back and a target on his forehead, but suddenly he was more scared than he'd ever been his entire life.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything.” Bucky ran his hand into Steve’s hair and pulled him in for a kiss. 

Steve started by worshipping his nipples, minding the long healed scars that wound their way down his left shoulder. He sucked and licked at each nipple before he shifted farther down, pressing his lips lightly down Bucky’s dusted happy trail. Bucky shuddered in delight, appreciative of Steve’s slow, gentle movements. Steve lowered himself until his lips graced Bucky’s ridgid member, poking his tongue out to run it along the length. He made quick work to deepthroat it as far as he could, making Bucky hyperventilate. He closed his eyes and shoved his fists into his hair, loving the warm _tight_ wet he felt as Steve took him inside. Steve didn’t spend long on it, moving quickly down to mouth at his balls and park himself between Bucky’s legs. He pushed Bucky’s hips upwards and out of the way, Steve licked down Bucky’s perineum, teasing the tight hole before dipping his tongue inside. Bucky felt sparks on each of his nerve endings going off as Steve licked inside as far as he could go, his hand still jerking Bucky’s cock. 

Steve striped Bucky’s cock with saliva and pushed his finger into the first digit, wiggling its way in. Bucky took two fingers before he felt like he would implode. 

“I’m ready.” 

“Sure you don’t want me to spend all night down here?” Steve’s smooth, light voice echoed as he pressed a kiss to Bucky’s inner thigh. “We both seem to be enjoying ourselves.”

“Get up here and fuck me, punk, or I’ll flip you over and eat _your_ ass out. See how _you_ liked to be teased.” 

“Oh, we’re just getting started, baby.” Steve’s grin was dirty and wild as he waggled his eyebrows, pressing his cock against Bucky’s wet hole. “That's still in the cards.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Bucky loved Steve’s cock. And this wasn’t one of those “It’s inside me and it’s great” moments. but Bucky legitimately loved the way that Steve fucked inside shallowly and after every agonizing inch, he let out a harsh moan. Steve soon bottomed out and they laid entwined, sweaty and breathless. Steve kissed Bucky deep as he pulled himself out and thrusted back in, shivering when Bucky pulled him in by his hair. Bucky’s prosthetic arm came to rest on Steve’s back, using the blunt fingertips to run along the edge of each of the blonde’s ribs. 

Steve pumped in and hit Bucky’s prostate, making Bucky arch and growl, blinking away the stars collecting in his eyes so he could see Steve, and the trusting, blissful features that ran across his face. Steve felt his knees falter as his climax built with each pointed moan. Bucky unlaced his fingers in Steve’s hair to run them down his stomach and grab his own weeping prick, thumbing the head before jacking in time with Steve’s powerful thrusts. 

“I’m gonna come.” Bucky breathed, bracing himself against the headboard, a willing victim to Steve’s euphoric onslaught. 

Steve urged Bucky with long swipes of his tongue inside his mouth, pounding in at a continued pace. Bucky opened his eyes and lightly pressed his left thumb into the hollow of Steve’s cheek, their eyes never disconnecting. Bucky came in hot white spurts across the space between them, worried why he couldn’t breathe. He slowed his hand and rode out Steve’s pace, following the wave of pleasure he felt running from his head to the tips of his toes. Steve suddenly pulled out, jacking his cock quickly, sitting up and staring openly at the mess that Bucky had made on his abdomen. The moment Steve saw himself come, he shoved himself back deep inside and Bucky got to feel full of Steve, slowly milking him dry. 

Steve collapsed on top of him, breathless and relaxed and Bucky laughed, followed by the most adorable and genuine smile Steve had ever seen someone wear. 

“Stay with me.” Bucky entwined their fingers and brought them to his lips, kissing Steve’s knuckle softly. 

“Tonight?” Steve pulled out and rolled over, taking Bucky with him.

“Tonight.” Bucky pressed kisses to each one of Steve’s eyelids, “tomorrow,” Steve could feel Bucky’s smooth exhale as he kissed the bridge of his nose. “two weeks, forever.” Bucky kissed Steve’s lips sweetly. “Take your pick.”

“You wouldn’t mind?” Steve smiled as he asked, seriously unsure. “I wouldn’t be in your way?” 

“Baby, please get in my way.” It was cheesy, but it was the truest thing he’d spoken in a while. 

“I’ll stay.” 

“Good.” Bucky rolled over and scooped Steve into his arms, forming a protective cocoon over him, closing his eyes and basking in the glow of the most meaningful sex he’s had to date. “I’ll make my Eggs Benedict.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

Natasha  
  
Nat?  
  
Hey there, loverboy. I see you came up for air. I already packed your bag.  
  
You’re the best, Nat. I mean it.   
  
I know. Be safe. Call me when you’re home.   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's short. More to come soon! Love you guys!


	12. This one is about Food

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To make up for all the short chapters recently. <3
> 
> I hope you guys like it! I could really use the boost, so hit me with those comments and kudos! 
> 
> I post on FRIDAYS, every Friday. If you wanna check out what else I have or simply like the FF platform better, come check me out on there. (Superwoman0124) Don't forget to follow me on Tumblr (whoaeasytiger0124) for chapter updates, general shenanigans or just some plain ol' fun.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 12/25 (This one is about food) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

 

It had been the first time Bucky had gotten a restful night’s sleep on his own bed in a year, all curled around Steve. Bucky could breathe deeply, wasn’t uncomfortable, and when Steve fell asleep holding his hand, Bucky finally drifted off, too. 

He didn’t want to get out of bed. But the urge to piss and his growling stomach forced him to. 

As he wandered into the kitchen, he watched Steve’s sleeping face perk up in a smile. He surveyed his cabinets and raided his fridge for the very few materials he needed, and tried not to wake Steve up with his loud clanging at 5 A.M. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

Bucky snuck to the bed and dropped both hands down, tugging the light sheet down Steve’s spread eagle, naked body. Steve’s cock is a blushed pink and it’s twitching proudly in the air. He sunk his lips into the meat of Steve’s inner thigh, causing a calm stir in the blonde. He licks Steve’s shaft from root to tip and Bucky watches Steve’s eyebrows scrunch together. He takes Steve whole, wrapping his tongue around the shaft as he pulls off, greeting Steve’s slowly opening and groggy eyes with a sly smirk. 

“Hi.” Bucky croaked out, still running his smooth fingers up and down Steve’s shaft, causing his breath to hitch. 

“Hi.” 

Bucky climbed up Steve’s body and kissed the top of his nose, avoiding potential morning breath. 

“Ready for breakfast?” 

“Not yet.” Steve reached up into Bucky’s hair and surged forward, connecting their lips quick, but sweet. Hmm. No morning breath. He thrusted his cock up into the air, rutting into Bucky’s dick in his boxer-briefs. Bucky grabbed ahold of the shaft of Steve’s cock and squeezed lightly.

“Down, boy.” Bucky pulled back and kissed Steve, getting off the bed and offering Steve a hand up. “After breakfast.”

Steve took it and sat, stretching his back with his arms in the air. 

“What if I don’t want to wait?” 

“It’ll be worth it.” Bucky winked. “Trust me.” 

“The breakfast or the sex?” Steve called out to Bucky as he began his walk back into the kitchen, half an asscheek hanging out of his boxers. 

“Both!”

 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“Your mom taught you to make these?” Bucky placed the plate in front of Steve as he asked, and Bucky ran back into the kitchen, checking a drawer. 

“Yep. Right after I came out to her. “If you’re gonna get a man, you’d better learn to make your Ma’s Eggs Benny.” Bucky scoffed as he imitated his mother, handing Steve his fork and knife. “Told me I’d win a man’s heart with these, someday. Just like she did with Pop.” 

Steve took his first bite and he couldn’t remember putting anything more delicious on his tongue, present company excluded. He sat back with a disbelieving humpf, shoving another small forkful into his mouth. 

“Your momma was right. You’re certainly my favorite person in the world, right now.” 

Bucky smiled, his cheeks warming as he took his own first bite. He put his leg out under the table and slotted it into Steve’s warm crotch, nudging Steve’s member with the tips of his toes. Steve let out a gasp, but pushed the fork into his mouth anyway. When Steve took his last bite, he moaned around the food in his mouth as Bucky slipped his foot into the narrow space between boxer and thigh, wiggling his bare toes up the shaft. 

“You’re teasing, you jerk.”

“Wanna do something about it, punk?” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

They’d been making out for 30 minutes before they got up, connected by their lips, and stumbled to the puddled comforter in the corner of the living room. 

Bucky found himself attached to Steve’s shoulder blades, sucking kisses into the top of the muscle and licking his way up the back of Steve’s neck. He ground his hips into Steve’s clothed ass, not insinuating, purely for contact. A moan ripped out of Steve that Bucky couldn’t have found hotter, and he tugged the blonde’s boxers down to his ankles. If he didn’t have Steve now, he would just go bat shit. 

Bucky sunk down and tongued his ass open, feeling Steve’s sharp nails leaving little indents in the meat of his shoulder. Bucky pushed in the first finger of his right hand with little resistance, wanting to feel, _needing_ to feel how hot and tight Steve was. Steve felt like a virgin, so tight his eyes rolled back. Steve threw his head back in an erotic moan, letting himself relax as he stroked his cock. Bucky pushed in two more fingers slowly, causing Steve’s breathing to go erratic.

“You ready?”

 _“Hell_ yeah.” Steve puffed out, his chest heaving and contracting. 

Bucky climbed Steve and licked his lips, lowering himself to grasp at Steve’s shoulder and pushed himself inside slowly. 

It wasn’t long before Steve came with a harsh cry and whispered encouragements, gazing deeply into Bucky’s eyes that sparkled in the early morning sun. Bucky pumped himself deep inside Steve, feeling the haze around him start to settle and fade with each labored breath. 

“Cold Shower?” 

“Absolutely.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

 

After a day of cuddling and blissful domestication, they opted for delivery pizza and whiskey for dinner. (Steve’s treat.) Steve curled himself into the space of Bucky’s chest, resting his head against Bucky’s shoulder. 

“How’d you find my sketch?” 

“I snooped.” Bucky half-chewed his pizza, peering down at Steve. “Don’t judge me.” 

Steve laughed as he took a bite of his own cheesy goodness. “I’m not. But- did you like it?” 

“I loved it.” Bucky said, all sweetness and seriousness to his face. He tipped Steve’s chin up and gave him a greasy kiss. “You really are talented. Would you draw me any differently now?” 

“Not really.” Steve shrugged. “I’d like to finish it though.” 

“We’ll hang it. If that’s not a weird thing to do.” Bucky sighed and looked around the walls, finding the perfect place for it. Over the couch on the left side, right above their makeshift bed on the floor. He pointed to it and Steve chuckled. “Does it make me an asshole to have my own picture hanging up in the living room?”

“You don’t have to hang it. It’s not _that_ good.” 

“It is, because you’re talented.” Bucky pressed a soft kiss to the top of Steve’s head. “Why’d you draw me, though?” 

“I drew you because... from the moment I saw your picture, I felt like I already- it was like, I _knew_ you. Something about your eyes and your smile.” Steve blushed and his attention remained on his half-eaten pizza. “I’m weird, I know.” 

“You felt connected to me somehow? And you still walked out?” 

“Not one of my better moments.” Steve nodded and laughed with Bucky, taking another bite. “PTSD does that to a person. But... I’d like to know you for real. Maybe make up for walking out.” 

“I will only accept sexual favors as payment.” Bucky jested, matter-of-factly.

“Deal.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(Day 4) 

There was no point in making the bed anymore. With the way they were going, every time Steve tucked the corners back in, they ended up back in bed within the hour. For instance, this morning, Steve had woken up with Bucky’s lips suctioning his cock, warming him up. He stopped and stared up at Steve, smiling. 

“If I gave you a balloon, would you sit on it, baby?” 

Steve let out a wholehearted laugh as he ripped the pillow from under his head and bounced it off Bucky’s face. 

That afternoon, Steve was on amazon, a 50-item cart pending in the upper right. Steve had no clothes and as much as he tried to wear Bucky’s in the passed 3 days? They were just too small. 

\----

“I look like a girl on spring break after a wet t-shirt contest.” Steve looked at himself in the mirror in the hallway, a none-too-impressed look on his face.

“I think they’d have a winner if you were.” Bucky was behind him, laughing and bending forward to kiss Steve’s cheek.

\-----

Bucky helped him pick out a few shirts, a pair of pants and some running tennis shoes. Until he saw the total. 

“$250?” Bucky stared at Steve incredulously as the blonde laughed.

“So? They said they couldn’t recover half my clothes.” 

“So, what, you’re gonna blow your savings on _clothes?”_

“I can afford it.” Steve shrugged and Bucky shook his head. 

“You’re not like, rich, are you?”

“I prefer the term _comfortable.”_

“Oh.” Bucky suddenly looked around and for the first time, he felt ashamed to be out of work. He didn’t even have _hot water,_ which was apparently a thing people felt he should have. Creature comforts and all that. Man, he needed to get a job and start making money.

“It doesn’t bother me.” Steve spoke flatly as he renewed his attention to the laptop, scrolling through to check out. 

“What doesn’t?”

“That you aren’t a millionaire.” 

“How are you-? From your job?” 

“It helps. But my parents passed, left me some property that I sold and some really nice houses, but I wanted to stay in the city. I was raised in Brooklyn, so I just moved somewhere closer to Nat. The money’s basically just been sitting there since then.” 

Bucky felt Steve glaze quickly passed the most important thing in that statement, and he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to bring it up. But he did anyway. 

“Your parents passed?” Steve turned away from him and returned his attention to the computer. 

“Yeah.” Steve’s voice cracked, typing in the address into the shipping boxes. _This_ address. “Dad died when I was three and Ma died when I was eighteen.”

Bucky surrounded Steve’s back with his body, placing a light kiss on the back of Steve’s head. 

“I’m sorry.” Bucky would ask more questions later, but for now, he didn’t want to open any old wounds.

“It’s okay.” What he meant was, _’I’m okay.’_

It had taken years of therapy, depression and anxiety to get here, but for the first time, he meant it.

He couldn’t wait to tell Bruce that he was right about dating. He felt a thousand times lighter.


	13. Loola, the Pain in the Ass and the Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *Trigger warning: PTSD-like symptoms. (It put me a weird place to write it, so I figured I’d put a warning here.)

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 13/25 (Loola, the Pain in the Ass and the Nightmare) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =  
*Trigger warning: PTSD-like symptoms. (It put me a weird place to write it, so I figured I’d put a warning here.)

(Day 10) 

After a very brief and passionate fight about money and who was paying for groceries (that Steve won), Bucky was taking him to Blue’s garage to pick up “Loola”, which Bucky found out Steve had adorably named his bike. It was finished and running better than ever. They drove separately back to Bucky’s, but it was comforting to Bucky that when he looked out the rear view, all he could see was Steve, carefree, relaxed and happy. He treated Loola real nice, swaying his body into her gracefully as he turned, checking multiple times for cars before crossing. Steve was so beautiful, with his firm thighs straddled tight to its leather saddle and his hair whipping in the wind; Bucky moaned when he had to adjust himself, feeling his cock half-twitch with interest. 

When they got inside, Bucky backed him into the wall and kissed him silly, pinning Steve’s hands over his head and mouthing at his neck. Bucky licked the sweat that ran down his chest in rivulets, whispering dirty _filthy_ expletives into Steve’s ear. 

“So fucking beautiful I can’t stand it.” Bucky growled, his left hand coming to rest below the nape of Steve’s neck, sucking kisses into Steve’s throat. Steve’s mouth opened in a moan, and he pushed his crotch out, grinding against Bucky. “Loved watching you ride.” Bucky kissed Steve deeply, pushing his hands into his hair. “Ready to see you straddle something else next.” 

Bucky came twice and Steve came so hard he couldn’t get up for 45 minutes. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

Pain In The Ass  
  
Bucky, where you been, man? You're my only friend that reads sign and I can't get a drink order to save my life.  
  
Buck, I'm starting to get worried, man.  
  
Crawl out of whoever's ass you crawled into and call your fuckin' best friend!  
Jesus, Clint. Since when were you my mother?  


Pain In The Ass  
  
Hallelujah, he has a pulse. Sass, but also a pulse. Crawl out of your hole. We're going on a double date.   
  
Can't, man. I have plans.  
Group therapy does not count as plans.  
It's not group. I met someone.  


Pain In The Ass  
  
Ditch 'em.   
Not this one, Clint. This one is the real thing.  
Shit. Alright. Free for dinner, Saturday? Bring the boyfriend. I'll buy the beer.   
Sure, if it makes you shut up.  


Pain In The Ass  
  
Deal. See you lovebirds at 6.  
Asshole.  
You love me.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

Bucky watched as Steve scrolled through the messages, smiling exactly when Clint called Steve his boyfriend. He reached the end and looked at Bucky. 

“We need new friends.” Steve laughed.

“Yeah, we need new friends.” Bucky nodded, taking his phone back and slipping it into his pocket.

“Boyfriend, huh? Does that freak you out?” 

“Should it?” Bucky smiled and looked down, peering back at Steve. “I’d like to be your boyfriend.” 

Steve smiled shyly and tucked himself further into Bucky’s hold. “I’d like you to be my boyfriend, too.”

 **Ping!** Steve’s phone went off on the table, vibrating into a semi-circle. They laughed off the awkwardness, Steve hiding his ridiculously large smile. 

“Does that mean I can delete the plenty of fish app now? I keep getting weirdo texts from strangers.” 

“Why don’t we do it together? I’ll get the jack and we’ll rid ourselves of men like Mr. Got_Cock.” Bucky walked into the kitchen and got the alcohol and two glasses, filling them when he returned. He pulled out his phone and they logged onto the app simultaneously, going to the settings page and scrolling down. Their fingers hovered over the “Disable Account” icon and they held their glasses up, setting them together. 

“To fate.” Steve started, glancing over to Bucky. “Without it, I wouldn’t have met my boyfriend.”

“To fate.” Bucky smiled, taking the shot back. They hit the button and smiled at each other when all the whiskey was gone, and they fell asleep on the couch, worn from the laughter-filled day. 

 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

 

Bucky felt his arm shaking as he sat up on the couch, his head rolling to the side in a lull. He opened his eyes a crack and saw Steve, practically seizing in his lap. Bucky was suddenly very alert, sliding Steve off of his lap and getting to his knees on the floor. 

“Don’t.” Steve muttered, his eyes shut tight. “Don’t hurt him. Bucky! Don’t you fucking-!” 

Steve rocked back again, his hips hitting the back of the couch and his head is shaking, _no, no, no._

Bucky _acts._

He surrounds Steve’s face between his hands and Steve’s forehead is on fire. 

“Steve!” He barks. “Baby! Babe-” He startles Steve and Steve’s eyes snap open and he’s flat as a board, blinking wildly. Bucky felt a sob wrack his throat but he quickly swallowed it, pressing a firm kiss against Steve’s lips. Steve didn’t move or react at all. “Come back to me.”

His chest caves for a moment and he begins to take a deep, harsh breath, exhaling it quickly. He begins to hyperventilate, raising his hands to Bucky’s cheek. 

“Can’t…” Steve shakes in his arms. “Can’t breathe.” 

“I know, baby. But you gotta take a deep breath for me, okay?” Steve’s head pulls to the side and his eyes become unfocused. Bucky snaps his head back, eyes heavy and so lost. Bucky is internally panicking as Steve’s breath slows, the fog over his eyes lifting. “Are you with me?” 

Steve nods curtly, inhaling a deep, final breath and lets it out slow. 

“Happen often?” Steve begins to breath normally as Bucky watches for pupil dilations, his emergency field training guiding him. 

Steve nods. 

“Panic attack?” 

Steve nods again, placing his hand over his heaving chest. 

“Take pills for it?” Bucky dropped back onto the floor and balanced on his knees, giving Steve enough room to sit up. Steve pushed himself up and sat, taking deep, even breaths. 

“Used to. But the nightmares-” He paused and covered his eyes with his hands. “The nightmares didn’t used to trigger them.” 

“Nightmares?” 

Steve pushed his hands away and Bucky watched him stroke the scar on the back of his hand. 

“Brock.” 

One word lit a fire under Bucky that burned so bright that his fists involuntarily clenched.

 _”That_ douchebag.” 

“The one and only.” 

“Not anymore.” Bucky winked playfully and climbed onto the couch beside Steve, who chuckled light-heartedly. “Tell me something about it.” 

“Like what?” 

“I don’t know. Something you learned from it, how your recovery went? Anything. Something negative, something positive, something you’d be comfortable sharing.” 

“Okay.” Steve held his hand out for Bucky to see, pointing to that scar on the back of his right hand. “When I said this one was important, I meant it. In my recovery, this wasn’t a scar, it was a time-piece. The more my scar healed, the more I healed.” 

“I’m sorry that happened to you.” 

“I’m not.” Steve settled into Bucky’s arms as Bucky checked the clock. 2 a.m.

“We don’t have to go today if you don’t want to.” 

“I want to.”


	14. Dark Horse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Guys! Last update for today!  
> Look for me next Friday with another installment of Brace for Impact!
> 
> Remember, if you like the fic, (and if you haven't already) throw me a kudos, a comment, or a subscribe to show your love! I reply to each one. :) When I get those cute lil' emails from Ao3, my heart jumps! You guys have been so wonderful so far and I hope to keep producing chapters you love!
> 
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> 
> Thank you! :*

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 14/25 (Dark Horse) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(Day 14/15) 

Clint’s place was a quaint tucked off house in the suburbs. The rental they rode in came to a halt when they reached the top of the hill, pulling into a parking spot. 

“Something you should know about Clint.” Bucky switched the ignition off, turning to Steve. “Know any ASL?” 

Steve shook his head no and remembered. 

“I know this _‘thank you’,”_ He raised his hands to his chin and lowered them. “means thank you!” And Bucky smiled. 

“That’s good, babe.” Bucky chuckled, overwhelmed with Steve’s cuteness. “Well, Clint is deaf. Explosion. Don’t ask where it happened. He won’t tell you. He can speak normally and read lips very well, and he’s a riot to be around. But he can be a little-” 

“Buck. Quit prepping me. He’s not gonna scare me off.” He pressed a kiss to Bucky’s lips and smiled. 

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“Hey, Fuckhead!” Clint’s presumably typical greeting was half-shout across the room.

“Hey, Pain in the ass!” 

Bucky and Clint hugged and Steve pushed his way into the threshold. Clint released Bucky and quickly shifted. 

“Shit.” Clint stared openly, looking Steve up and down. “You’re real? I think I lost a bet or two on that one.” Clint walked across the room and took Steve into a tight bro-hug, tapping him on the back. He pulled back and stared at Steve. “I don’t even know your name, Bucky’s Boyfriend.” 

Steve blushed and shot his hand out. “Steve Rogers, sir.” 

“You call me sir again, Steve Rogers, and I’ll make you earn it.” With a wink, Clint walked into the kitchen. “Dinner is ready.” Bucky and Steve followed him in. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Steve checked his phone _twice_ and suddenly he lost both Bucky and Clint to 5 minutes of them signing, not that he minded. He enjoyed watching their conversation. Occasionally, they made the same signs over and over, and other times Steve got completely lost. 

During a break in the motions, Steve pulled on the forearm of Bucky’s shirt. 

“Teach me something.” 

“Um, okay.” Bucky turns towards him and thinks. He rests the webbing of his thumb against his bottom lip and swipes his fingers down. Steve imitates him perfectly. 

“What’s it mean?” 

Bucky smiles and shakes his head. “Beautiful.” 

Steve can’t stop the blush that runs to his face. 

Bucky quickly pulls him up by his chin, pressing a relaxed kiss to his lips. Bucky turns back to his conversation with Clint, a new and permanent smile remaining on his face. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

 

Steve sees both Clint and Bucky sign the word ‘beautiful’ a couple of more times before they give his eyes a break and begin to tell Clint the story of how they got together aloud, so Steve can participate. 

They leave around eleven o’clock and Steve is beat. He dumps himself into the passenger seat and yawns, mocked by Bucky for how cute he is. Steve is so tired, but he knows that they have to go to Nat’s tomorrow afternoon, and he runs through the list of activities that need done. Before he knows it, he slowly feels his eye close and falls asleep on the long ride back. 

Bucky wakes him when they get home and Bucky half-carries him through the living room and into the bedroom. He lays him down softly and pulls his phone out to text Clint.

Pain In The Ass  
  
So?  
Marry him.  
Give me a couple of years. I just might.

Steve rolls over towards him as Bucky sends the last text and Steve licks his lips, breathing out.

 _“I love you.”_ Steve had his eyes closed, his lips pressed tight in a soft smile.

Oh. Bucky smiled from ear to ear and asked himself if that counted. If Steve really felt that way. 

They had so much to talk about in the morning. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

When Steve woke up at 6 a.m. the next morning, Bucky was shocked. Bucky busied himself with collecting the items he needed to make pancakes as he tried not to openly stare at Steve’s cute morning demeanor. He failed, miserably. Bucky caught sight of the sliver of tanned flesh and happy trail that peeked out from under Steve’s shirt as he stretched, walking to him for a good morning kiss. Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky from behind, pressing a soft kiss to his shoulder blade. Bucky felt so much warmth spreading from the spot Steve’s lips touched. 

Steve pulled his arms away and Bucky felt the start of a yawn in Steve’s chest rise, and he stretched his arms in the air. When they came down, Bucky turned towards him. 

“Can I help with breakfast?” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Half a bag of flour all over the floor, 5 pancakes and 2 orgasms later, they collapsed breathless to the floor together. Steve chuckled as he kissed Bucky, dusting the flour from his bangs. 

“Look at you! You’re a mess.” 

“Only for you, dear.” 

Bucky lays back and joins Steve on the cold tile floor, attempting to collect his breath. 

“You said you loved me.” Soft, suggesting and patient. Bucky turned to Steve who looked horrified. 

“When? Just now?” 

“No.” Bucky shook his bangs and shot a smile Steve’s way. “Last night, in your sleep.” 

“It’s obviously not true.” 

Bucky wasn’t hurt. But the truth was important. “It’s not?” 

“N-No, I mean, It’s too soon.” Steve perked up and looked at Bucky. “Isn’t it?” 

“Too soon for who? Cause to me, I know when you love someone, you love everything about them. And me? I know when you orgasm, your toes curl.” 

Bucky sat up and rested his hand on his palm, walking his fingers up Steve’s chest and down his side. Steve let out a shivery chuckle. “and you love that I know your tickle spots.” Bucky turned his face toward him and pecked him lightly on the lips. 

“I know your guilty pleasure is Dark Horse by Katy Perry.” Steve let out a dumbfounded chuckle, waving his hands erratically. 

“And you like vanilla bean coffee with chocolate chips, but not chocolate chip ice cream. You’re a good person who has flaws and I-...I know you have a dark and haunted side that you keep inside and guard tightly,” Memories flashed of Steve struggling to breathe, waiting out the fear during the panic attack yesterday. “and one day you’ll open up to me, talk to me about it and it’s not gonna change the way I feel about you. I love everything I know about you. And I'm sure I'll love everything I don't know. It’s not too soon. I do love you, Steve.”

A tear slipped down Steve’s cheek and his resolve waivered, shoving his face into Bucky’s neck. 

“I love you, too.” He whispered, wiping his face on the back of his hand. 

Bucky nuzzled against Steve and took his face in his hands, kissing him hard. 

“You okay?” 

Steve nodded, slowly. 

“Good.” Bucky kissed his forehead. “Is this flour starting to itch your butt, or is it just me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M NOT CRYING, YOU'RE CRYING!


	15. The Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 15 and their 1 month anniversary

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 15/25 (The Talk) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(Day 15)

Nat invited them to brunch the day Steve “moved out” of Bucky's. It was chaotic, but they finally packed up the last of the 8 boxes. It took them three hours to finally stop screwing with each other enough to pack.

They carried each box carefully, placing them in a single cab truck that Bucky borrowed. 

They walked back in for the last batch of boxes and Steve sat on the couch, breathless. He patted the seat beside him and Bucky took the hint, falling down in the spot. 

“I don't know if I'm all that ready for you to leave.” Bucky breathes, leaning over to press a kiss into Steve's hair. 

“Pack a bag, then.” Steve glanced at Bucky and smiled. “Come stay with me for two weeks.” 

“Isn't the reason why you're leaving because you have to get work done? Won't I distract you?” 

“Only if you walk around naked.” Steve held his pointer finger up and dropped it, too exhausted from stairs to hold it up any longer. 

“I plan to. Why _wouldn’t_ I walk around naked?” 

“Now you're definitely staying.” 

They kissed and laughed, taking the remaining boxes out, along with the duffel bag Buck packed, slung over his shoulder. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Nat had been telling Bucky a story when Steve’s phone rang. It was Sam, and Steve took the call. Natasha turned to Bucky suddenly, wringing her hands. “Can I talk to you in the kitchen a sec?” 

“Sure.” 

They abandoned Steve and walked to the kitchen. The instant they were out of Steve’s eyesight, Natasha span around and glared daggers directly into him. Bucky’s mind raced, wondering what he’d done wrong so soon. 

“Bucky, I will have you aware that not only am I capable of getting every speck of information I’d ever need to crush you like a cockroach, but I am also trained in more physical combat than you.” The shorter woman stuck her index finger out, almost wagging it at him. “If you _ever_ think of doing the same shady shit as those assholes that scarred him up have, I will find you, and I will hurt you in ways that will haunt your dreams for eternity.” Nat smiled and cocked her head. Bucky felt threatened, which he supposed was the point, but he was still elated that Steve had someone else who cared about him just as much as he did. “M’kay?” And she quickly walked away. 

“Force to be reckoned with, huh?” Bucky recalled what Steve had said about her in the coffeeshop what felt like an eternity ago, feeling himself smile as he whispered to himself. “That’s an understatement.” 

He decided he liked Natasha. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

On the way to Steve’s apartment, Steve sucked kisses into Buck’s throat. Each brush of his leg with the shifter knob drove him insane as he straddled his legs across it, the thing now dangerously close to his ass.

Steve tugged Bucky along the hallway as they exited the elevator, joined at the palms. They walked to the last apartment on the left and Steve agitatedly stuck his key in the door. 

They moved inside and Steve pinned Bucky against the wall, grinding his ass into Bucky’s crotch. 

“Wanna take a real shower? With hot water?” 

“With you?” Bucky kissed Steve’s back feverishly, digging his nails into Steve’s chest. He could orgasm just from thinking about how glorious it would feel to take a warm shower _and_ fuck Steve silly. “Absolutely.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

_“Ohhhh,_ shit.” 

That first slide in was always the most intense. Quick, rushed actions leading to not enough prep and not enough time to ease into it. Steve didn’t really care. All he could focus on was the warm water and Bucky’s breath gliding down his back as Bucky pushed in, spreading him wide open. He felt so full, so open and so, _so,_ warm. Bucky’s wet tendrils of hair tickled down his back as he thrusted, the sounds of flesh on flesh the only thing to be heard other than clipped-off moans and Bucky’s growls. 

Bucky tilted his head back and soaked his neck in the warm water, his hips pistoning automatically, feeling the utter bliss of being inside Steve Rogers, his boyfriend and the love of his life. 

They came simultaneously and held each other, breathing deeply until the water ran cold. 

“How was your first hot shower in 2 months?” Steve chuckled, wrapping a towel around his waist and finding another to dry his hair. 

“I forgot how good hot water felt.” Bucky huffed a sigh and shot a light smile Steve’s way. “We’re _only_ staying at your place from now on.”

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(Steve and Buck’s 1 month anniversary) 

Steve was blindfolded. Not once in his life had he been blindfolded for an anniversary. Or any other occasion really. With Bucky, he assumed it would be something spectacular, and when the vehicle came to a halt Steve felt an excitedness simmer under his skin.

“Where are we?” 

“Would I have put the blindfold on if I was just going to tell you?” Bucky chuckled and Steve could hear Buck pull the keys out of the ignition and pocket them. 

“Good point.” 

“I’ll be over in a sec.” Steve heard Bucky opening his door and walking around the front of the truck. He pulled Steve’s door open and Steve stuck out his hand out, coming in contact with the B-pillar of the truck. He was met with cool, smooth digits as Bucky grasped ahold of him, tugging him upwards. Bucky slotted his hand around Steve’s back and guided him forward, over a step and Steve couldn’t feel the warm night air blowing on his cheeks anymore. He knew they were inside. The door echoed shut as he was ushered forward in little shifting steps, hitting something into his path. Steve heard the scraping of furniture on the floor, felt Bucky’s hands pull him back by the hips and slowly guide him into a stiff-backed chair. 

Bucky arranged something in front of him, metal pinging off metal and Steve felt fingers beginning to untie the blindfold around the back of his head. 

“Kiss me first?” Steve whispered, laying his hands over Bucky’s busy fingers. Bucky stopped what he was doing and tilted Steve’s head back, pressing his lips into Steve’s plush ones. Bucky kissed him softly and sweetly, a quick brush of his tongue to Steve’s bottom lip that went straight to his cock. He made quick work of the knots while they kissed until the blindfold came loose and fell in his lap. Steve’s eyes adjusted in the dimly lit room, a burning candle in the center of their table. Steve observed the plates as Bucky sat down and was met with a gorgeously stacked burger and a fresh pile of fries. The toppings are exactly what Steve liked and he got them all correct, down to the dill pickle spears laid across the side.

Steve looked up and his boyfriend’s face was curious and giddy, his hands tented. 

_“Well?”_ Bucky implied. 

“It’s-It’s amazing, Buck.” Steve took a deep breath and smiled, grasping Bucky’s hand from across the table. Bucky felt a blush rise to his face and he tilted his head down, letting a stray couple of hairs fall into his eyes. He was hiding and Steve knew it, but at this moment, couldn’t call him out on it. “I still don’t know where we are.” 

“Will it ruin the ambiance if I tell you we’re at the garage?” Bucky chuckled uncomfortably.

“Ahh.” Steve tried to look around in the dark and a muffler in the corner shined back at him in the candlelight. “Just thought _you_ smelled like oil.” 

“Hungry?” Bucky takes the lid from his own plate and finds a similar set-up, with addition to mayonnaise. Steve peers up and looks at Bucky through appreciative eyes and smiles. 

“Starved.” He takes his first bite and is met with a deliciously juicy burger, the taste was smokey and crisp. The veggies on top were fresh and flavorful and Steve’s heart suddenly swelled and he felt a tear form in the corner of his eye. _”Ohmygawfsh.” ___

__Bucky is nodding into his sandwich and chewing his first bite._ _

__“Where’d you learn to cook?” Steve asked when his mouth was empty and felt himself taking bigger bites than probably necessary, but the smile it put on Bucky’s face was the only insurance he needed that it was okay behavior when it was _Bucky’s_ food he was enjoying. _ _

__“I’ve had various influences over the years.” He took half a bite and reached below him in an ice bucket, pulling out a bottle of whiskey. “Mostly my Ma, but also because I missed the food when I was overseas. When we’d get the resources, I’d cook a real nice meal for the boys.” He poured them both generous amounts and they took them back to wash down the delicious burger. “Learned to cook to cope.”_ _

__“Before or after your arm?”_ _

__“Before.” Bucky cleared his throat and took another bite to stall. “Had to relearn to cook when I got this thing.” He lifted his left arm off the table and sat it back down, grasping his glass and taking a swallow._ _

__“What was the most difficult thing to relearn?”_ _

__“Straining stuff with a colander was tough for a while. So, I just stay the hell away from pasta.” Bucky smiles and takes another bite, but his face suddenly turned stony and serious. “Something you should know about me. I’ve got skeletons in my closet, too. How I battle those skeletons is by learning new things and keeping my hands busy. Sam’s idea.”_ _

__Bucky laughed and peered up at Steve with half hooded eyes, a smile gently resting on his face._ _

__“I went to therapy, took my meds, did my due diligence. Trusted the american medical system. When Bruce told me to try new things. Well? I did, and I molded clay for about three months. The only thing to not fall apart? It’s this little gray wolf whose eyes are two different sizes.” Steve felt the laughter rise to his chest. He watched Bucky’s smile reform and continued. “That was my “let’s-try-a-new-hobby phase.””_ _

__“Do you still have it?”_ _

__“Nah.” Steve sipped his whiskey and paused, peering at the contents as he swirled the glass in his fingers. “Buried it with my mom. It was her favorite thing. Sat in her house until the day she died.”_ _

__“Steve, I-I didn’t mean to,” Bucky stammered his hands out in a placating manner._ _

__“It’s okay, Buck. Really.” Steve’s attention snapped up to Bucky’s apologetic face. "I’m not ashamed or upset to talk about my parents. Just maybe not on our anniversary?”_ _

__“Fair enough.”_ _

__Steve reached across the table and grasped Bucky’s left hand. Bucky smiled._ _

__“I know you make an amazing breakfast, but what’s your favorite thing to make?”_ _

__= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =_ _

__The conversation was light and carefree, just telling old tales and really getting to know each other. After a month of dating, they both felt more comfortable with each other enough to _trust._ Something neither of them had with another breathing human to date. _ _

__They collapsed in each other’s arms in Steve’s warm bed, post-coital bliss rocking them into a deep and heavy sleep. The had succeeded their first month together with little to no hiccups, and hoped it would go on forever this way._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Don't forget to leave a little love! Kudos, comments and subscriptions earn a very special place in my heart. 
> 
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> 
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> 
> Enjoy, guys!


	16. Nu Naher

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 16/25 (Nu Naher) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(Steve and Bucky’s 2 month anniversary)

The night air was chilly, and it didn’t stop Steve from tucking his arm around Bucky’s smaller frame as they walked down the empty street. They were a block away from their destination, and the sooner they got out of the cold, the happier they’d be.

“Do you really think this is a good idea? Nat’s kinda…” Bucky removed Steve’s coat and handed it to the waiter, removing his own. 

“Abrasive? I know. But I think they’ll really hit it off. Her sass and his…” Steve joined Bucky in the booth of the same restaurant their second-first date was in, hoping this time they might actually get to taste the food. 

“Sarcasm?” Bucky provided. 

“Exactly, thank you.” Steve sipped his water as Nat strolled into the front in her little black dress and red pumps, her hair tied into a messy bun on her head. She waived at the pair and the waiter saw her over. 

“Hey guys!” The waiter removed Nat’s coat and shifted off to his post.

“Hey Nat!” They said in unison, chuckling at the crazy-random-happen-stance. They thought it was particularly cute, but Natasha instantly rolled her eyes. 

She sat down beside Steve and kissed his cheek, adjusting her clothing and getting comfortable. 

“I’m so happy you arranged this. I feel like I haven’t talked to you in forever.” 

“Nat, before we order- you should know...” Bucky began as Nat looked up in horror, staring directly across the table. 

“Why is there a fourth place setting?” Nat looked at Steve with a glare so squinty, that Bucky felt sweat pouring into the collar of his shirt. “No, not _again.”_

“Nat, _no,_ it’s not like that!” 

“I swear if you two miscreants set me up on _another_ one of your stupid blind dates with one of your stupid, uncultured-”

Nat stopped as she gazed across the room at the gentleman that just came in, who Bucky and Steve immediately identified as Clint. Nat did _not._

“If that’s my date, I’ll stay.” Her gaze never drifted from the man in the entry, even as he began to saunter over.

“He’s Bucky’s best friend, don’t screw it up.” Steve whispered over to her as Clint came into earshot and Bucky stood up to hug him. 

“Pain in the Ass!” 

“Fuckhead!”

They embraced swiftly into a bro hug and he went after Steve next, hugging him quickly. 

“Hey Hunter, how’s it hangin’?” 

He was talking to Steve, but his eyes swallowed Natasha whole. Bucky tore his attention away momentarily, but his eyes still shifted back from Bucky to the beautiful girl. 

“Hunter?” Nat whispered in Steve’s direction, eyes tracing Clint’s shirt and slacks.

“It’s a nickname. Says I’m the crazy-ass hunter who went after the most bipolar, crazy-ass wolf.” Steve shrugged, pointing to Bucky but he quickly lost her attention in favor of Clint, who was sliding in beside her, where they had planned him on the _other_ side of the table. Bucky awkwardly scooted, giving Clint and Natasha more room. 

It looked like they needed _a_ room, but Steve and Bucky weren’t really ones to judge. 

“Who’s this beautiful woman I’m sitting next to and why has no one introduced me?” Clint looked around the table. 

Bucky spoke up. 

“Clint, this is Steve’s best friend, Natasha. Nat, this is Clint. Don’t get attached. If he’s not nice to you, I _will_ neuter him.”

“First off, Buck. You’d have to catch me first. I’m deaf, not a slug.” Clint winked in Bucky’s direction, but his focus remained solely at Nat, who was just as absorbed as he was. “Secondly, I don’t think you’ll have to worry about how nice I’ll be.” 

Natasha blushed, taking a sip of her water. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“Think it’s going well?” Steve leaned on the back of the wood bar, looking back at their table, seeing Nat and Clint so close he thought their noses were touching. 

“Are you kidding me? With the way they’re eye-fucking each other? She’ll have twins in nine months.” 

Steve looked at Bucky incredulously and smacked him across the arm. And even though it was the left one, Bucky still jokingly recoiled. 

“Ow!” Bucky chortled and grabbed the first set of four shots and Steve followed with the second set. 

They set them on the table and they each picked one up. Clint held his in the air and smiled at Nat. 

“A toast! To Natasha, my beautiful new friend and to two idiots in love.”

Steve and Bucky kissed quickly and took their shots back, twin disgusted groans bursting from their throats. 

“Another?” Steve handed them out and each of them gracefully took it. 

As Steve handed Clint his, he shrugged, looking to Natasha. “Nu Naher!”*

They took each of their shots back. 

Nat slammed her glass down and turned to Steve, giggling. 

“I taught him how to curse in russian.“

“Oh, great.” Bucky coughed, covering his mouth with his fist. “‘Cause he needed to add _more_ swearing into his vocabulary.”

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

The night air was colder than it had been when they came in. But the couple didn’t mind waiting the extra couple of minutes Clint and Nat spent speaking a couple of steps back, giggles and Clint’s voice growing louder. 

They turned back just in time to see Clint lean in and kiss Nat sweetly, pulling away and waving goodbye. Nat blushed in the darkness, an excited smile on her face as she walked to the joined couple. She linked arms with Steve as they began the walk back to their car. 

“Thank you for setting me up on your stupid blind date.” 

“It wasn’t a date.” Bucky laughed, stopping for the green light. “It just turned into one. We just wanted our best friends to meet.” 

Nat’s jaw dropped and she looked at Steve quickly, who just shook his head no and quietly laughed. 

“Well, shit.” Nat scoffed, watching her pumps as she walked. “At least I got his number.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

When Steve walked passed Nat’s bedroom two weeks later, he peeked in and found her on YouTube, trying to sign things that meant she was learning them for Clint. 

Steve didn’t know if this was going to the best thing that happened, or the worst. But he silently considered the beginning of his own relationship, quietly closed the door and left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Nu Naher (Hy ʜaxep) means “Fuck It” or “I don’t care” in Russian.
> 
> * Nat is practicing “Cute” and “Date” when Steve busts her. Cute is taking the first two fingers and flicking them down your chin. Date is your hands formed in a kissing motion, index fingers in the air.* 
> 
> Alrighty guys, that's it for this week! I'll be updating to FF and Tumblr a little later. I'll see you next Friday!


	17. Meet the Barnes'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve meets Bucky's family on their 3 month anniversary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Updated for minor word fixes: 7/13/18

CH 17/25 = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = (Meet the Barnes’) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(3 month anniversary)

It’s not that Steve found Bucky’s family intimidating. It was just that… well, yeah. Okay. Steve was intimidated. He’d never really belonged to any kind of _family_ before. It was always just him and Ma. And when Ma died, well, there was no one but Steve. 

So to walk into The Barnes’ at precisely 7 P.M. was something he was doing while sweating, clutching onto Bucky’s hand like it was a life preserver and trying not to pass out due to oxygen deprivation. 

George Barnes was the humble middle child of three, to each of his siblings had at least 3 children a peice. Winfred had 3 siblings herself, which meant Bucky had a ton of relatives. And a very panicky family reunion to attend.

He wouldn’t be meeting them all tonight, (thank _god)_ and he silently considered that he’d already met 3/5 people here tonight. This would be a breeze. Right? 

He walked into the dimly-lit sitting room, 50’s brown floral print on everything and immediately he smelled a roast cooking. He felt an elusive feeling he’d been chasing for a while. The feeling of being _home._ His heart and lungs instantly settled. 

A older couple stood from their places on the furniture, turning to greet the pair noisily entering. 

Bucky embraced a voluptuous woman with coal black hair, and he kissed both of her cheeks before pulling away. 

“My James.” She whispered, catching his cheeks between her open palms. 

“Hey, Ma.” 

He turned to the gray-haired man who waited patiently beside the woman. Bucky stuck his hand out and the man slapped it away, wrapping him in a tight hug. “Hey, Pop.” 

“Hiya, Bucky.” Pop looked Steve with kind, knowing eyes over his son’s shoulder. “Who’s your friend?” 

Bucky’s dad let go of him and stepped aside, holding out his smooth and unwavering hand for Steve. Steve shook it strongly. Rebecca and Big Blue came strolling in from the swinging kitchen door, cooing at Jessie in her mother’s arms. 

“Guys, this is Steve, my boyfriend.” He gestured to the couple in front of them. “Steve, this is George and Winifred Barnes.” 

His mother walked two paces and clasped Steve’s other open hand. 

“It’s wonderful to meet you both.” Steve spat out, his nerves getting the best of him as the older couple let go, removing themselves from his space. “Thank you for inviting me into your home.”

“Finally found one with manners, eh, big bro?” Rebecca clamered from the other side of the room, standing up. “I’ll take the claim for that.” 

“You remember my pain in the ass sister Rebecca and her husband, Blue? And my adorable little niece Jessie!” 

“Of course I do!” Steve ignored Winnie’s shocked gasp as she chastised Bucky on his potty-mouth with a backwards slap to his shoulder. Steve shook Rebecca’s hand as she shifted Jessie in her arms so Bucky could coo at her. “Hello, Rebecca. Nice to see you again, Blue.” A respectful nod and he shook Blue’s hand.

“How’s she runnin’?” Blue’s baritone voice filled the room. 

“Like a top, thanks to you.” Steve smiled through his laugh.

“Loola’s in good hands.” Bucky commented, stifling his obvious and extreme attraction to Steve on his bike away from the forefront of his thoughts, reminding himself to be on his best behavior. “He rides her every chance he gets.” 

“Loola?” Winnie seemed lost, and Steve suddenly realized that maybe it hadn’t dawned on her that they were talking about his _bike._

“My motorcycle!” Steve suddenly bursted. “Ma’am, M-Mrs. Barnes.”

“Oh!” She seemed embarrassed, her cheeks reddening as she flustered. “Winnie, dear, please.”

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Meeting Bucky’s family was _not_ exactly what Steve had expected. His cheeks began to hurt from laughing and he’d long since given up attempting to eat this _delicious_ roast in favor of keeping it all in his mouth when he ended up laughing with half a mouthful. He could still taste in on the roof of his mouth, and that was enough to keep his stomach satisfied. 

They’d gone around the table and told little stories from Bucky’s childhood, to which he defended each one, disputing and refuting minute details to make himself appear the hero instead of the dumbass. It was Rebecca’s turn, and Jessie slept quietly in the next room. 

“So, we’re like, sixteen and eleven, right?” Her hands flail wildly above her plate and she peels back her bangs, showing Steve her left eyebrow. “See this scar?” Her eyebrow was lifted by an old scar, white and nearly invisible until she pointed it out, about the same length of her pinky. 

Bucky rolls his eyes and crosses his arms, sitting back against his chair. “This story, really?” 

“Hell _yeah,_ this one.” Becca’s smile can’t be wider. Winnie reached over the table and nailed Becca in the arm with a wooden spoon for cursing. “Sorry, Ma. Anyway-” She sips her white wine. “We had this old, beat up trampoline, right? And we’re jumping on it. Well, it starts to rain, but we don’t care, cause we’re kids, right?” 

Steve begins to laugh, checking Bucky’s expression and finds it light, awaiting the end of the story so he can fight back. 

“He goes, ‘hey sis, bet you can’t do this.’ and he does a cartwheel. _I_ couldn’t do a cartwheel. I know this, he knows this.” She turns to her husband. “I’m topheavy.” She gestures to her boobs. Winnie’s gasp rocks the room as everyone erupts in joyous laughter. 

“So I try to do a cartwheel and he pushes me over, knocking my eye into an exposed spring. Blood everywhere, and thirty-two stitches later, I’m left with this beauty.” She points to the scar again. 

“Becs, it was years ago! Don’t you ever let stuff go?” It sounds rehearsed, like they’d had this same conversation a million times. 

“Not when I’m scarred for life, big bro.”

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

After apple pie, everyone migrated to the sitting room and just like in the movies, Winnie broke out the naked baby pictures she had of Bucky.

One was Buck, about age two, his abdomen clothed in a naval outfit, his round pink butt pointed to the screen. “The photographer was so surprised when James dropped his drawers and just peed, right there on the table. Said it was his first time anything like that had happened. He thought it was so funny, he gave me this photo for free.” 

The room filled with laughter and the glaring gaze Bucky shot at his mother was mildly burning, but Steve just laughed, relaxed and looked at the photo he was handed. She pulled out another one where he looked about five and was missing his two front teeth, holding his baby sister. Steve assumed for the first time. Bucky was a bright, happy little boy.

“Such a good little boy he was.”

She pulled another out and he was older, much older and his hair was long. Bucky had a disgruntled look on his face as his baby sister, now ten or so, putting girly things like braids and poofy ponies in his hair. But Steve could hear Bucky’s laughter through the photo. Knew he loved his sister and thought about what Bucky would be like if he had a daughter. He wondered if he would let her put bows in his hair, too. 

She pulled out another and Steve had a hard time believing it was the same man in front of him, currently biting his bottom lip and hiding his eyes, his leg crossed over the other. As if by the look on their sad faces, he could tell which picture she was now showing him. Winnie became suddenly more morose as he handed Steve the photo and Steve got his first good look. It looked like Bucky had just come out of surgery, frail, bruised and bloodied, wrapped up tight in bandages. His arm was gone, and he knew it was Bucky, but the cold, blue eyes were all Steve could recognize.

“It was a hard time for my James.” She spoke sullenly as she took the photo away, placing it back in the box and setting it on the table. The room was quiet as Steve peeked up at everyone, sharing a moment to recall memories. It was disrupted when Jessie began wailing, and Becca got up to check on her. Winnie went with her shortly after. 

“Folks know how to throw a party, huh?” Bucky joked, his smile fading almost instantly. 

“She didn’t mean to, Buck. Musta just been in there.” George’s voice boomed from his place at the bar, and Bucky just shook his head, observing everyone’s faces individually. 

“I know.” Bucky looked at Steve and nodded. “It’s getting late, we should head home, don’t you think?” 

Steve knew he had no choice, but he wanted to support Bucky anyway. “Yeah. Gotta work tomorrow.”

“Tell Ma I said goodbye and to-...” Bucky stood up and so did Steve, inching towards the door. “Call me in the morning.” They waved their goodbyes and walked out to the truck silently. 

Bucky slammed the driver's door shut behind him as Steve climbed into the passenger seat. 

“Are you upset she showed that to me?”

“Not at her, it obviously wasn’t her fault, but-” Bucky sighed and dragged his hand over his face. “Look, I just wasn’t prepared for you seeing something like that yet. We’re doin’ so good I wasn’t ready to-” Bucky sniffs a sob, keeping himself together and turning to place both hands on the wheel. 

“Buck, I know that something horrible happened, and I know there’s a backstory. It hurts to see that stuff. It does.” Steve rested his hand against Bucky’s raised arm, sliding it up and grasping his hand. “That story is a part of you. And I love you. All of you. If that means a few bumps on memory lane, I’m prepared to face that.” 

Bucky clasped Steve by the back of his neck and dragged him closer, touching their foreheads. 

“You remember what you said? About fate bringing us together? You said I basically saved your life that first day?” 

Steve shrugged and he smiled. “I don’t remember putting it _quite_ that way.” They shared a breathy laugh, still so close to touching. “But yeah, I remember.” 

“I don’t think it was fate. I think it was karma.” 

“Karma? Like when bad juju comes full circle type of stuff?” 

Bucky couldn’t help but laugh. “Sorta. Like all this bad shit that’s ever happened, it-it meant something. Prepared us for the best thing that would ever happen to us.” 

Steve knocked their foreheads together again lightly, leaning in to press a kiss to his boyfriend’s lips. 

“Your place or mine?” Steve chuckled as he took a deep breath, smiling and pulling Bucky closer. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Steve sat on the edge of his bed with his laptop across his feet, searching impossibly and muttering to himself, before he just caved and texted his best friend.

Natasha  
  
You do real estate, don't you?  
I dabble.  
  
Can you find me a two bedroom? Something with a big kitchen?  
You thinking about moving away from me, Rogers?  


Natasha  
  
Not too far. Couple more blocks.   
What's going on in that head of yours?  
  
Just want to be closer to him. That's all.  
I'll find you something by next week.  


= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

(A week later) 

“Hey.” Steve finally walked into his living room about noon, clutching a his fist to his chest, and darted over to the couch, setting something down. Bucky assumed it was the blonde’s duffel bag because they were moving to his place tonight. 

“Hey.” Bucky walked across the room from his place at the oven and pecked Steve on the cheek, picking up the newspaper and surfing through the classifieds when he sat down on the sofa. “Breakfast is in the fridge. Lunch is in the oven. Your choice.” 

“Buck, I’ve gotta tell you somethin’.” Steve sat beside him and stole his focus from the newsletter, his fingers under his chin. “I know you don’t think we should move in together yet,” Bucky began to start his rebuttal, but Steve quickly stopped him. “which I get! But this commute, this switching back and forth, living out of a duffle bag, it’s not right.”

“You’re breaking up with me?” Bucky’s eyes pained and his expression became worried, Steve watched the cogs in Bucky’s head turn. “Why? What did I do? Wh-” 

Steve rushed him for a kiss, shutting him up. When Bucky relaxed and his eyes closed, Steve pulled back. 

“No, babe. I’m not breaking up with you.” Steve turned in his seat and reached over beside the couch, pulling over a heavy, nearly-empty wooden shelf. In the bottom of the shelf sat a framed, finished version of the “Just_Bucky Selfie” Drawing, beautifully shimmering in the early afternoon sun. 

“Wha-” Bucky pulled the frame out and dropped the shelf to his lap with a rough thud.

“That? Is for your place. A reminder of me when I’m not there.” Steve watched Bucky’s face soften and turn a glowing shade of pink as he looked on to the drawing, his eyes never leaving Steve’s easy brush strokes and vivid coloring. He got every scar and detail correct, probably improvised a bit from the selfie he sent.

“Is it weird to gush about it when it’s a portrait of yourself?” 

“I know it’s a little weird. But that’s what the second part of the gift is for.”

 

“A shelf?” 

“A shelf. For your new room in my new house.” 

“So, you’re officially asking me to move in with you? Cause- I mean, we already said it’s too soon.” 

“I know, just- hear me out. I’m not asking you to move in with me. But I am moving. Into a three bedroom house. Thirteen blocks closer to you. That shelf is for the closet in the second bedroom, and a place to put your things when you stay with me. and I designed a kitchen that I think you’re really going to like.” 

“For me?” 

“Absolutely.” 

“Why?” 

“Because I can.” Steve shrugged. “Never had a reason to have a big place before. Finally found a reason to.” Steve twisted his fingers into Bucky’s on his thigh. “When we _eventually_ move in together, I’d like it to be this place.”

“I don’t even know what to say.” 

“Say yes.” Simple. Easy. Flat. 

“Are we crazy?” Bucky couldn’t believe that after 3 months, Steve had not stopped surprising him. 

“FUBAR.” Steve smiled and his bright, white teeth appeared, and quickly disappeared. 

“Hoo-rah.” Bucky barked back and Bucky kissed Steve so quick and _deep_ that a moan punched out of him. 

Bucky stripped Steve slow and crawled over his lap, thrusting his hips onto Steve’s slick cock. Steve attempted to strip Bucky, each time he was stopped. When Steve got close to coming, Bucky rocked his hips and popped his button, standing as quickly as possible to take his pants off. His dick stood proudly and he gave it a few strokes before mounting Steve’s stiff dick.

Steve looked on, confused. 

“Spent all morning working myself up. Was going to fuck you in your sleep, but didn’t know how you felt about it.” Bucky kissed Steve and breathed, lowering himself down. Steve was met with an open and wet entrance, suddenly wondering if that’s how Bucky kept busy between making breakfast and lunch. “Couldn’t wait to feel you fuck me.” 

And he swallowed Steve whole. Steve felt every inch inside of Bucky as Bucky sat up, placing Steve’s palms on his chest. Steve’s body suddenly became familiar and thrusted upwards into Buck’s tight heat. His hips working themselves up to a brutal pace that had Bucky clenching his fingers into the meat of his shoulder. Steve sat up and flipped Bucky onto his back, thrusting downwards and feeling the wet, tight heat of Bucky around him.

Steve bit into his neck when Bucky came across their stomachs, huffing a loud moan. He breathed for a moment before grabbing Steve’s face in to kiss him. When Bucky’s tongue began twisting in Steve’s mouth, he felt his orgasm build. He fucked so hard that his vision turned white, squirting his load into Bucky’s tight hole. 

They collapsed into each other before drifting to the floor. Steve rested his head on Bucky’s chest and listened to his heartbeat. 

Steve nodded, a curt smile on his face. “Is that a yes to the- the drawer?” 

“That’s a yes.” Bucky’s voice cracked as he breathed.


	18. The One where Steve breaks the law

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so there's some kink coming. I don't really know how to tag it without spoiling it? It doesn't get all whips and chains but it's definitely not vanilla. So, proceed at your own risk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Updated for wording: 7/13/18

CH 18/25= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = (The one where Steve breaks the law) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(6 month anniversary) 

Steve had only been shopping alone for three hours and Bucky already missed him. Bucky wandered through Steve’s house and caught himself looking at the photographs littering the wall, all of them containing the both of them. (Aside from the one above the mantel, which was a picture of Steve’s gorgeous mother from her high school days. He only wished he’d had a chance to meet her and thank her for raising such a wonderful person.) Bucky loved the way his boyfriend looked in photographs, and he found himself picking his favorite of Steve up off the shelf.

He was so in love with this sexy, frustrating punk. He felt pathetic thinking about it, but honestly the dumb, happy smile on his face said otherwise. This is the one. The one he'd been looking for forever. 

It was their 6 month anniversary and Bucky had something special planned. Steve's favorite dinner by candlelight, a smorgasbord of movies to choose from, Bucky placed a bag of Steve's favorite popcorn in the microwave in their shared kitchen space, and he even ventured out and bought the kinky toy Steve had been talking about. 

This was gonna be a good night. 

Soon, dinner got cold and Bucky rifled through the movies, opening them out of boredom. He checked his phone over and over, wondering what the hell was taking his lover so long.

An hour later, Bucky’s phone rang and he figured it was Steve, explaining why he was late. Instead, when he picked up the phone, it was an older, harsher voice. 

“Mr. Barnes?” 

Bucky pulled the phone away to check the caller ID. Unknown number. 

“Yes?” 

“This is the police station. I have a Mr. Rogers here in custody. He told us to call you to come bail him out.” 

“What? Why is he in custody?”

“Petty theft. And some old traffic tickets. Bail is at a thousand dollars.” Phones rang in the background as the police officer cleared his throat. 

“A thousand? For traffic tickets?” Buck asked, inconceivably. 

“And petty theft, son. Keep up.” The older man jested as he coughed, followed by a small silence over the receiver.

“Can I talk to him?” 

“Rogers! Phone!” 

The line was quiet for moment, and Bucky held his breath. He couldn’t imagine what Steve was going through. All the possibilities started flashing through his mind and his heart was suddenly beating a mile a minute. 

“Bucky?” Steve’s voice was quiet and small, but the second Bucky heard it, he felt a relieved calm wash through his body.

“Yeah, baby. I’m here. Are you okay?” 

“A little embarrassed. I just forgot the sunglasses were on my head!” It sounded like it wasn’t the first time he’d said it. “Can you grab my bank card and come down to the station? I may need you to hack into my bank account and move some funds around.” 

“I have the money.” 

“Bucky, you don’t have to.” 

“Why, I’m sure you’ll find a way to pay me back.” Bucky’s silky smooth voice glided through the receiver. And suddenly they were both _very_ aware that they weren’t talking about money anymore. As concerned as he was about Steve’s sanity in the moment, he knew that Bucky’s playful demeanor would do nothing but calm his boyfriend. 

“Thank you.” Steve sighed happily. 

“Do me a favor?” 

“Anything.” 

“Tell all the inmates you’re with that you already have a daddy.” Bucky smirked.

Steve laughed and quickly hung up the phone.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

The police station was crowded and Bucky was corralled through the hallway, trying to find the front desk. He pushed his way through, and sized up the big man behind the counter with donut crumbs in his chin-hair. 

“I’m here to spring someone? Steve Rogers?” 

The man barely bothered to look up, typing the name into the computer. His eyes never left the screen as he pointed to the entrance to his right, behind a swinging lap door. 

“Third cell on the left, talk to Officer Jones. He’ll give you the rundown.” 

Bucky dragged himself through the door as quickly as he could before walking through the mint-green hallway, scanning the cells to his left. He observed a few blondes in the third cell before seeing Steve's hunched shoulders, head down and silent. 

“Steve?” 

Steve looked up and even in the dull light, Bucky could see the purple bruise forming above his red cheek. His eyes still smiled as his lips curled up, happy to see his boyfriend. Steve stood and stepped to the bars, clasping his hands beside Bucky’s. 

“Which one of these assholes did that to your face?” 

Bucky surveyed the room to express a distinct growl before Steve pointed to a guy shoved in the corner between the benches. He was breathing, but judging by his slumped form, he wasn’t going anywhere soon. The inmates beside him glared at the man, even to make sure of that fact. 

“Don’t worry. I can handle myself.” Steve stood proud and winced when he opened his bruised eye the whole way, but his focus never faltered from Bucky’s face.

“Ready to get out of here?” Bucky smiled, his humor returning with Steve’s confidence. 

“More than.” 

Bucky walked down the corridor and found Officer Jones’ desk. He sat down at one of the chairs and waited until he caught the older man’s attention. 

“Can I help you?” 

“I’d like to bail Steve Rogers out.” Bucky pulled his bank card on the desk and shoved it at the man. 

“Not until his exit interview.” Jones’ moustache twitched as his focus returned to the computer screen. “He’s gotta talk to Sarge first.” 

“When will that be?” 

The older man sighed, as if Bucky was bothering him. 

“When we get to him.” The phone beside him rang, and the officer glared at Bucky before picking it up.

“He’s been here for _4 hours._ Doesn’t he deserve a better time table than that?” 

“Then he shouldn’t have broken the law, sir.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Two hours later, Bucky was called by the Sarge. Steve was handcuffed and lead to the desk by two very _large_ police officers, and Bucky and Steve sat in the chairs next to each other. Sarge uncuffed Steve and let him go, and Steve rubbed his wrists lightly. 

“Steven Grant Rogers?” 

“Yes.” The couple leaned forward, giving the sarge their undivided attention. 

“You are hereby accused of petty theft and you were brought in on some overdue parking tickets. Do you understand the information I have provided? 

“Yes.” Steve answered tersely. 

“You will receive a court date in the mail to plead and pay your fines, but chances are they’ll throw it out.” Sarge said with a snort, dropping the paperwork onto his desk.

“Why?” Bucky felt himself say. 

“Let’s just say, when I tell them what happened in that cage, they’ll have no problem releasing you on some trumped up retail charge. Considering it’s your first offence, and all.” Sarge readjusted the waistline of his pants and he winked lewdly in Steve’s direction. “Take care of the fines. But no one from my station will come and hunt you down.” 

“I’d appreciate that, Sarge.” Steve began to stand up, but the older man thrusted his hand out to stop him. Steve sat back down.

“While I have you here, would you like to update your PFA? It says I have to ask.”

Bucky leaned forward. “PFA?”

“A Protection From Abuse order for Brock.” Steve leaned back and caught Bucky’s eyesight, meeting him with watery eyes. “It’s about up.” He turned to Sarge and affirmatively shook his head. “I also have a few things to add. A new address and a…-a new partner.” 

Bucky couldn’t help but feel the corners of his lips perk up but quickly stifled it, considering the company. He happily gave his information, asked very little questions pertaining to what they needed to know, and they strolled out, hand in hand. Very few people on the street focused on their joined hands when they caught sight of Steve’s bruised eye socket and cheekbone, also the fact that he was smiling a big, doofy grin. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“What the _hell_ did you do to make that guy like you?” Bucky flustered around the kitchen, putting the dinner back in the oven. Cold chicken was okay, too, but it could use some reheating. “Don’t tell me you put out.” 

“What? B-Bucky, no!” They both shared a laugh. “An inmate was calling him a homophobic slur and I decked him. He hit me back. There was a fight. Sarge told me later that him and his life-partner have been together almost thirty-one years. It’s the first time an inmate got to him, and had I not punched him, he might have. Said he’d find a way to pay me back.” 

Bucky looked at him incredulously, pouring Steve a four-fingered whiskey. “What if he presses charges? Why make things worse for yourself?” 

“He won’t.” Steve smiled and shrugged before continuing. “I don’t like bullies.” Steve tucked the whiskey back, draining every last drop. 

“So the PFA against Brock? Why isn’t that asshat in jail?” Bucky sat back on the couch and stared at Steve who was processing the sentence.

“Couldn’t prove it was him. Something about an alibi. His four goons got court martialed, though.” Steve sighed. “Last I heard, he was in Ohio.”

“So you filed a PFA anyway?” 

He looked down at the scar across his hand. “It wasn’t the first time he’d kicked my ass. Knew it wouldn’t be the last time he tried.” 

The moment was interrupted by the stove timer, and Bucky stood to check on it. Steve cupped his glass off the table and grabbed the bottle with the other, joining Bucky at the kitchen table. The table was set for two, and dwindled, unlit burnt candles sat between their place settings. Roses scattered the unused portion of the other end. Steve peered into the kitchen and saw an unpopped popcorn bag (probably his favorite) under the microwave, and about ten blu-ray cases stacked on their kitchen island. And a wonderfully braised whole chicken that Bucky sat in between them. 

Steve’s undivided attention turned to Bucky, and he felt the tears gather in his eyes. Bucky turned toward him after putting down the shearing fork. 

“What?” Bucky shrugged innocently.

Like Bucky had no idea what Steve was realizing. 

“You did all this for me?” 

“I had a different idea of how we’d spend our anniversary.” Bucky’s tone was light and airy, tearing into the moist chicken on his plate. 

“I-I’m sorry.” Steve huffed sharply, sitting back in his chair. “If I had known-” 

“You weren’t supposed to.” Bucky smiled as his fingers found his pocket and he thumbed close the small velvet box hiding there before smiling into his scotch glass. “It’s no big deal.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

The next morning, Steve woke up first. He was in the shower when Bucky opened his eyes and when Bucky got up to fix breakfast, Steve had already taken care of it. Eggs, Bacon and two slices of wheat toast parked on a plate in Bucky’s spot. 

“Not that I don’t like your cooking.” Steve was drying his hair with a towel, drops landing on his bare chest and rolling down onto his gym shorts as he walked in behind Bucky. “Just thought I’d return the favor.” 

“You cooked?” 

“Can’t say anything for how it’ll taste.” Steve threw the wet towel in the bedroom and sat down. “I’m a bit distracted.” 

They ate breakfast mostly silently, but every minute or so, Steve would shift in his seat, looking uncomfortable. In the same breath, he would get relief and let out a happy sigh as he chewed. 

“You okay?” Bucky shoved half a piece of toast into his mouth. 

“F-fine.” Steve shifted again. 

“You look uncomfortable.” 

“Only when I sit.” 

Bucky’s gaze became heated as he gave Steve a once-over. Sweat beaded from Steve’s forehead and his pupils were dilated, Bucky smirked as Steve turned to him, his face open and pleading. “You ready to give up yet?”

“I was ready to give up an hour ago.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Bucky barely got the chance for his knees to hit the bed before Steve was yanking his gym shorts down in front of him, revealing a small black plug nestled between his two pink cheeks. 

Exactly where Bucky had left it last night.

 _“Please.”_ Steve pleaded, stiffening his arms under him and presenting his ass to Bucky. 

Instead, Bucky reached down with his fake hand and fiddled with the head of the plug, tugging it back and forth. He slapped Steve’s right cheek soft and testing, and when a moan ripped from Steve powerfully, he did it again. 

He pulled the plug out gently, dragged himself out of the confines of his sleep pants and slapped it against the open hole. Bucky had to grip himself close to the base to stop from coming right there. Steve moaned, pushing his hips back until he could feel the tip of Bucky’s cock pushing in. 

A groan erupted from Bucky’s chest as he gripped tight onto Steve’s hips and thrusted shallowly into the open and moist hole. 

“Still so fucking wet from last night, baby.” Bucky bends over the expanse of Steve’s back, pressing kisses into the taunt skin. “Did you take it out in the shower?” 

“Didn’t think you’d want me to.” Steve’s face turns red as Bucky sheathes himself inside, thrusting out just as quickly. 

“You were right.” Bucky hammered home, rocking Steve onto his chest and pushing the bed into the wall. Steve moaned on every inward thrust, and finally spilled come on his favorite sheets.

Bucky spiraled quickly afterward, twitching and pulsing inside with a death grip to Steve’s hips. He came with a harsh cry, his hips stuttering with his release. 

“Shoulda asked Sarge to keep the handcuffs.” Steve half-laughed, half-breathed, collapsing on his stomach. “We’d have put them to good use.” 

“Are you telling me you’re kinky, Steve Rogers?” Bucky rolled over onto his back and pulled Steve in by the shoulders. 

“Just for you, baby.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one got kinky, guys. #Sorrynotsorry. Prepare for a teensy-weensy more kink. Then back to plot. I promise!


	19. Kids, Kinks and Life with PTSD

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smutty goodness with a smidgen of plot. 
> 
> Love you guys!

CH 19/25 = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = (Kids, Kinks and Life with PTSD) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(1 year anniversary)

For someone who _claimed_ to not have a lot of stuff, Bucky had a lot of stuff.

When the couple moved in together, Bucky put his stuff in storage. He’d kept meaning to go through some of it and why not on a glorious, warm Saturday morning. They’d had a big date night planned for their anniversary, but until five o’clock, they had nothing better to do other than eat cold pizza and have sex. 

But the day was for adulting. Unfortunately. 

Steve held up a battered, broken lamp that he remembered went in Bucky’s bedroom. Bucky looked at him with a noncommittal grunt, dismissing it. Steve tossed it to the dumpster. 

“You’re throwing a lot of this stuff away.” 

“You noticed! I don’t think my thrift-store chic would mix well with the twenty-first century vibe you have going on with the house.” Bucky tore into another box. Which ended up being more magazines. Where the hell did he even get these things? Toss. 

“Just thought we’d keep.. You know, sentimental things?” Steve dug through a box and fished out a black tether attached to a bed restraint system. He tested the four metal o-rings attached to each corner and when he found them to be strong, he held them up for Bucky to see. “Used for something kinky, I hope?”

Bucky looked up with a smile, but it faded quickly. “Not exactly.” He returned to his task and chucked another box, his scowl prevalent. 

“One of the exes you told me about before?” Steve looked upset, his eyes darting around the box. Something else to focus on, just in case Bucky broke out into a story about an ex. He wasn’t sure if he could hear about it, the way they’d hurt him.

“No. For my nightmares. Right after I came back.” Buck forced half a smirk, but it quickly dropped.

“Oh.” Steve dropped the tie-downs back in the box and picked at a spare thread. 

 

“I uh-” Bucky pointed to the box. ”-took those off exactly a week before your first night at my place, a year ago.”

“Oh.” Steve felt a little speechless. “Why’d you need them?” 

“After the arm,” Bucky huffed a laugh and chucked a glass figure back into the box he got it from. He dusted his hands off and turned towards Steve. “I remember everything. Being in the field, climbing up the building, falling…” Bucky ran his fingers through his hair, flattening it as he squinted at Steve in the bright sunlight. “I even remember the surgery. You’re not supposed to. But for some odd reason? I do. So I had flashbacks. And I’d fight. And thrash. And I’d ripped my stitches twice in two weeks. So they recommended I take action or be forced to stay the hospital until I was healed. I don’t like hospitals, so.” He pointed to the tie-downs that Steve had picked up again. 

“Did it help?” Steve picked the O-ring up and put his wrist through the space there, securing it.

“For a while.” Bucky smirked. “Just made it so I couldn’t hurt myself.” 

Steve put his other wrist inside, cinching it. 

“What are you doing?” The tense moment dwindled in the air and Bucky finally laughed, watching Steve closely. 

“Ever hear of associations? Like if you can take bad associations and turn them into good ones, that they’re more manageable? Helps with nightmares and stuff?”

“Yeah?” 

“I have an idea of how we can make this a good one.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Bucky had been tied up for two _freaking_ hours. Steve took his time with Buck, lavishing the brunette’s neck with his tongue, gliding it down to circle around his nipples. 

Bucky pulsed in his constraints, kicking his legs out as Steve slipped his fingertips down to tickle his side. Steve moved so slowly down that Bucky thought he’d go crazy. Steve puffed a hot breath over the inward curve of Bucky’s proud-standing cock, forcing his eyes closed, only to have Steve move back up, kissing the v-cut of his hips. 

Bucky keened, using his force to pull on the restraint of his right wrist, itching to dig his finger’s into Steve’s back for purchase. Push him down and make him _suck-_

Steve took some pity on him, licking a single stripe up the length of Bucky’s cock, making him shudder and groan. 

Steve smirked, moving upward and shuffling his knees over either side of Bucky’s head. Steve dropped down, his cock inches from Bucky’s face as he took Bucky’s member into his mouth and didn’t stop until he triggered his gag reflex. Buck’s hips shuttered, attempting to fuck up into Steve’s mouth but was stopped short by the cords attached to his feet at the edge of the bed. He leaned up and seized the tip of Steve’s dick in his mouth, sucking as much as he could from this position. Steve was teasing him, he knew, and somehow that only made him harder. _More_ turned on.

Steve offered light, shallow and explorative thrusts into his mouth, taking Bucky’s cock in sync. Bucky’s arms were tense as he pulled on the hindrances holding him down wanting to pull down on Steve’s hips, wanted _more, **now.**_ Steve frustratingly kept a slow, steady pace. 

Steve suddenly sat up and grasped Bucky’s cock with both his hands, shifting his knee around Bucky’s head. Bucky let his tongue hang out and licked a long stripe up Steve’s hole, pressing small kitten-licks to the rim. Steve gasped around Buck’s cock in his mouth, sending shivers down his spine. Steve kneaded his nails into Bucky’s thighs and it encouraged him to shake his hips and have Bucky go deeper, so Bucky happily licked whatever he could reach. Steve pulled forward and began to jack Buck in earnest, swaying his hips and sitting down on Bucky’s tongue. Bucky plunged it deeper and _harder,_ opening his baby up as much as he could. 

Something about this made Bucky swoon and lose control, pressing his head up and _really_ giving his Stevie what he deserves. Bucky heard the muffled shouts of pleasure from Steve around his cock, and he suddenly felt locked and loaded. 

His muscles tensed and seized, pushing his tongue flat inside Steve and retracting as quick as possible. He felt the spasm spread from his balls to the tip of his cock, a haze flushing from his head to his toes. Steve swallowed around Bucky and took it all down. Bucky could hear the smirk spread across his face as he swallowed Bucky audibly. Steve lifted and slotted his cock inside Bucky’s warm, _hot_ mouth and pumped away, his legs and arms shaking. Bucky felt perspiration drip down onto his thighs, rolling down his ass but he didn’t care. Steve was fucking his mouth, and Bucky was loving it. He hummed and licked and tucked his teeth, and the sudden urge to come again came close to happening had Steve not beat him to it. 

He came gloriously into his mouth as he shook, hyperventilating and whispering filthy words. 

“God, _Buck.”_ Steve retracted, breathless and turned in Bucky’s arm, curling under his left. He suddenly remembered that Bucky was still tied down and went to work. 

“That wasn’t exactly what I’d had in mind when you mentioned good associations, but I also don’t mind either.” Bucky recovered, breathing lightly as Steve untied his wrist from the headboard. Steve crawled down him and laid his head on his chest, hearing his hammering heartbeat echo in his ears. 

“Yeah, well…” Steve sighed. ”Leave it to me to turn something traumatizing into something kinky.” They both laughed, huffing heaving breaths. “Have any other trauma you’d like to act out in bed?”

“If they end up turning into something like that? I’m sure I could think of some.” Bucky pressed a kiss to the top of Steve’s head. 

“What about any other kinks?” Steve twiddled with Bucky’s nipple, curling it under his finger. 

“Other than you on your bike?” Bucky kind of just huffed a laugh. “Can’t say I’m really particular. I’d be down to try anything once, though. Anything we do, I’m sure I’ll be happy.“ Bucky nodded and exhaled. “What’s your erotic poison, Rogers? Whips? Wax? Twelve inch dildos?”

“No way.” Steve laughed, sneaking a peek at Bucky’s face. “I mean, not that I’ve done any of that. Hair pulling, scratching. Obviously tying you down was A+. I’d be up to try a few more… timid things, though. Oh, when you squeeze my hips real tight in doggie?” Steve looked back up and Bucky nodded in acknowledgment. “That’s my kink. Not those big horse-sized toys you see on the internet. I wanna be able to walk when I have kids.” 

They laughed heartily in unison and Bucky calmed down just enough to ask a question he could finally ask after thinking about for months. 

“You do want them, though.” Bucky shifted his head to look at Steve, only able to go so far. “Kids, I mean?” 

“Y-yeah. I do. Two, probably. A boy and a girl.” Steve chanced a glance Bucky’s way and found his face stoic and thoughtful. “Do you?” 

“I’m too fucked up to have a kid.” Bucky huffed, half-laughing at his expense. Steve immediately turned in his arms, his lips inches from Bucky’s stubbled-chin. 

“You’re not fucked up.” Steve’s hand lifted and rested on Bucky’s cheek. 

“I’ve got so many scars, I give kids nightmares.” He lifted his left arm pointedly, but it was cut short by the restraint still holding him there. 

“Your scars don’t amount to how messed up you are or not. Just to how strong you are.” Steve observed the scar on the back of his hand that still rested on Bucky’s warming cheek. “Use them as a badge of courage. Not something to be ashamed of.” Steve slid his other hand along Bucky’s left prosthetic forearm. “Help your children learn to see _through_ other’s scars.” 

“You're a freaking poet, you know that?” Bucky's whole face lit up in a smile as he tugged Steve in for a brief kiss, their soft lips brushing sweetly. “I guess... I could have a handful of babies. You know. With the right person.” Bucky winked in Steve's direction. 

“You askin’ me to have babies with you, Bucky Barnes?” Steve laughed, his cheeks perched and red. 

“I'm asking if you're open to it, yeah. In a couple ‘a years.” 

“In a couple of years.” Steve smile took Bucky's breath away as his golden halo of hair shimmered in the afternoon sun. “Yeah, I’d like that.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Bucky snuck out of their bedroom really late in secret, retrieving what he originally went to storage for. He clasped the frame and tugged it out of the back of the pick-up, lugging it up to the house. He carried it up the stairs into the landing, and pulled down the generic flowers-in-a-vase painting that Bucky secretly hated, and hoped Steve wasn’t attached to for any reason. He tucked it aside and pulled out the frame of Steve’s “Just_Bucky portrait”, sitting back, arms crossed and drank it in after not seeing it for so long.

He remembered packing the picture away the day they’d packed his boxes and he “officially” moved in 2 months ago, because one day he came to Steve’s new house and never left.

He pushed his hands into his pocket and fiddled with the worn velvet box he’d been carrying with him for almost 6 months. He opened and closed it with his thumb, thinking about the smooth silver band inside. Never the right time to ask. He looked at the painting and reminisced about their life so far and what an exciting year it had been, leading up to Bucky deciding to ask Steve to marry him. 

He thought Steve would appreciate its location and he simply just walked back upstairs and crawled back into bed. Steve’s body was warmer so he snuggled close, breathing in the deep clean smell of his boyfriend.


	20. Too pretty to Cry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me! X'D

CH 20/25 = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = (Too Pretty to Cry) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(2 year anniversary)

Shopping on an empty stomach was a _horrible_ idea. Steve wandered through the boothes as his stomach rumbled and distracted him from his conversation with Bucky about work. The farmer’s market was nearly abandoned save for the vendors themselves. The impending rainstorm chased people away, but in a way, he was thankful. He got to be himself around Bucky without fear of judgement or simply having to punch someone for opening their mouth about homosexual PDA. 

For that kind of freedom, they didn’t mind a little rain. 

Bucky picked up plums, apricots and other assorted fruits, while Steve got to work picking veggies. He reached to observe a leek and another hand beat him to it, which turned out to be attached to his old friend, Dr. Bruce Banner. 

“Oh!” Bruce muttered when he noticed it was Steve, and a bright smile came to his face. “Steven! How have you been? When you stopped comin’, I got worried.” 

“No need to worry, Bruce. I’m alright. How are you?”

“‘M good.” He shoved his hand into his pocket and adjusted the tote hanging off of his arm. He apparently had nothing more to say on the subject, because he stared up at Steve expectedly. 

“Hey, uh- yeah, I’m glad I bumped into you, actually. I want you to meet someone.” Steve peeked back at the cart he last saw Bucky at and waved him over when he looked up. Bucky rushed over, half-eaten plum in his hand. “Buck, this is Bruce.” 

“Bruce? _The_ Bruce?” Buck awkwardly shifted the plum to his other hand and sucked the juice of it off his thumb, wiped it off on his shirt and thrusted it out, offering Bruce to shake. 

Bruce took it, rather apprehensively. 

“Bruce, this is my boyfriend, Bucky Barnes.” 

It seemed to click as Bruce took his hand back, thrusting it at his temple. “Oh! Cause I told you- Right.” Bruce was shocked, stuttering and speechless that a patient had actually **taken his advice** and was _better for it._ “Bucky, it’s so nice to meet you.” 

“I’ve heard a lot about what you’ve done for my Steve here. The pleasure is mine, Doc.” Bucky swung his arm around Steve’s shoulders and tugged him in close.

Bruce felt heat rise to his cheeks as he realized the awkward silence that stood between them and shifted onto the other leg. 

“Well, I’ve gotta go beat the storm, guys, so it was nice meeting you, Bucky and Steve... “ Bruce eyed Steve happily, so relieved and so open. “Still here for ya. Day or night. Although, I don’t think you’ll need me.“ 

“Let’s hope not, Bruce.” Bruce turned and walked away with a wave.

The moment they turned back to the vendor, lightning shattered through the sky, and the heavy rain began. Steve and Bucky watched each other’s faces as the water soaked their hair, their smiles growing. Bucky opened his arms and opened his mouth, tasting the rainwater on his tongue. He shook his hair in Steve’s direction and smirked, offering his elbow out for Steve to take. They linked arms and Steve huffed a laugh, walking their way home in wet, soggy clothes. 

They made it a couple of blocks from home before Bucky turned to Steve suddenly, damply kissing him on the cheek. 

“Race you home!” 

Bucky took off running down the sidewalk, his white tennis shoes flopping onto the sodden pavement, and Steve’s eyes wandered to his boyfriend’s ass, shifting with every footfall. 

“What are you, Buck, ten?” Steve asked himself.

Steve walked alone in the rain, watching Bucky get farther and farther away. He sighed and laughed, sucking his top teeth. 

“Screw it.” Steve jogged after him. 

He eventually caught up to Bucky next to a green light and Bucky gave him a head-nod as the raindrops dripped down his forehead. “Last one there does the dishes tonight?”

“You can’t make it more interesting than dishes, Barnes? You goin’ soft in all this domestic bliss?” Steve stretched his leg behind him quickly, trying not to show Bucky that he was shaking some rust off. 

“Fine.” He waited until the light went red and pushed Steve’s shoulder lightly, driving his foot into a puddle. “First one there gets to do that thing we’ve been talking about doing.” Bucky raised one eyebrow and crossed the street, but Steve stood back, stunned. He quickly shook it off and his focus laser pinpointed, taking off at lightning speed towards Bucky. The house pulled up in sight and as he caught up, he realized he was still unsure on rather he wanted to win or not. 

Steve let Bucky win by a hair.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“Do you even wanna _do_ anything tonight?” Steve flopped down on the couch beside Bucky who was taking his sopping shoes off and tossing them aside. 

“Like what?” Bucky sighed and kissed Steve’s cheek quickly, getting up and moving into the kitchen on socked feet. 

“I don’t know. Dinner, drinks, play in the rain some more? Wanna see if Clint and Tasha wanna hang?” Steve called back to him, a yawn threatening to surface.

“I don’t need any of that. Just need you!” Buck called back. He peeked inside of the freezer and sighed. “and ice cream! I need Ice cream!” 

“I’ll make a trip.” Steve immediately got up and strapped his tennis shoes on, traipsing after Bucky into the kitchen. He waited until Bucky put his things down and trapped him in his arms, resting his own on his shoulders. “Happy Anniversary, Buck.” 

“Happy Anniversary, Stevie.” They shared a smile and a quick kiss, and Steve turned to go on his way. Bucky called to him. “Make sure it’s!-”

“Pistachio! I know.” And he left.

Bucky is the luckiest guy on the freaking planet. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

The convenience store is a brisk thirteen block walk away on the newly wet pavement, but he’d make the walk a hundred times for Bucky’s ice cream cravings. It gave him some time to think and get his thoughts sorted. It stopped raining and Steve was kinda glad to be dry as he watched the sun set fall over the skyline. 

The owner, an older man named Jan was always very accomidable and very nice to Steve, but when he walked through the door, the man looked uneasy. His eyesight shifted to the window on the right side of the store, the side Steve hadn’t come from, and Steve walked back to the freezer. 

“How’s it goin’ tonight, Jan?” He grabbed his ice cream and moved to the front counter, setting it down and fetching his wallet. 

“A little slow, Mr. Steve.” Jan rung the ice cream up until his hands stopped, his gaze frozen on the ice cream. “A strange man was just in here. Gave me the heebie-jeebies. Took Walsh Street down to Newport Ave, I think. Be careful out there tonight.” Jan bagged his ice cream and Steve handed him the money. 

“I’m always careful, Jan. You don’t need to worry about me.” 

Steve began the walk home in high spirits, thinking about the happy face Bucky would make when he took his first bite of the ice cream when he got home. 

Steve was the luckiest man alive. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Steve had been gone for a while.

Bucky paced his kitchen, socked feet replaced with boots and ready to raise hell when he walked out the door. Unless Steve walked through it first. Which Bucky hoped is exactly what would happen. 

‘Cause he trusted Steve. He would never just leave without an explanation or without a call. If he’d been held up, Bucky would have at least got a text. And he isn’t one of those boyfriends that after a few hours of non-communication, they start stalking. No. Steve would come home. In due time. 

Bucky bit down on his right thumb nail and stared at the motionless and silent cell phone resting on the counter, willing it to move. Ring. Send a telepathic message. Anything. 

Bucky nabbed the cell phone off the counter and shoved it into his pocket, reaching for the doorknob to the front door in two strides. Bucky felt the phone vibrate in his hands and he checked it quickly. It was Steve. _Finally._

Bucky slid the green phone button to the left and held it to his ear. 

“Steve?” 

“Buck...” Steve sounded funny. Almost like he was suffocating. Panic attack? Bucky quickly rolled through the list of options of what could possibly be wrong. He didn’t like the odds. 

“Baby, you okay?” Bucky tucked his hair behind his ear and licked his lips, listening closely. 

“Help…” Steve’s frail voice begged over the line, before rasping breaths and silence took over. 

The call disconnected.

Shit, shit, fuck, _**SHIT.**_

Bucky tapped 9-1-1- into his phone against his fingers and began to bolt out the door.He glided down several sets of steps, easily skipping a few as he began to break into a full-on run to the store he knew Steve was on the way to. 

When Bucky saw the bright police lights reflecting off the buildings, he slowed momentarily, realizing that he may have been too late. 

No. No, no, nO, NO! 

Bucky ran faster than his legs thought possible, his lungs hardening and he thought he’d die, but Steve was _right there._ Bucky slowed to a stop when he passed the police cars, walking directly passed the caution tape until a cop stopped him with his arm out. 

“Whoa, whoa, son. Behind the tape, media can wait.” 

Bucky watched two cops tote a large, burly and struggling man in cuffs into the back of the police car, screaming some profanities about how he was being treated unfairly. He scanned the left of the scene and saw them loading a gurney with a blonde that looked like Steve, unconscious, into the ambulance. 

“That’s-” He begun to tell the officer. “That’s my boyfriend!” He pointed and his feet began moving before he noticed they were, his body gravitating towards Steve. “Please.” He begged the officer, a tear forming in the corner of his eye. “Let me go with him.” 

“Go.” The man barked. 

Bucky ran to Steve as they loaded him into the van. Steve was out as he suspected, but Bucky grasped his hand anyway. 

“You family?” The paramedic in front of him asked, flipping her ponytail as she turned in the van, tugging the gurney up. 

“Yeah.” Bucky nodded, watching Steve for movement, his eyes to open, fuck, _anything._ “I’m his family.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Steve wakes up with a horrified and wet gasp, his eyes as bright a blue as Bucky’s ever seen them. The paramedics scrambled as they took his vitals, feeling for injuries on his chest. 

Bucky felt relieved and he gripped onto Steve tighter, leaning over to look into his eyes. 

“Hi, baby.” Bucky smiled, tears streaking and slowly flowing down his cheek. 

“Hey Buck.” Steve’s voice was weak and tired, but he still attempted to smile. “Don’t cry,.... babe. Too pretty... to cry.” 

Bucky laughed through the sob in his throat and smiled. The ambulance hit a bump in the road and they all jumped, causing Steve to wince in pain. 

“My chest.” Steve scratched at his shirt and the paramedic removed it, cutting up into it instead. She checked for pain and she found some over a purpling spot on Steve’s stomach. Bucky looked away, reverting his attention to Steve’s open, panicked eyes.

Bucky bent down and kissed his lips lightly, resting his forehead against Steve’s. 

“Don’t you die on me, Stevie.” He sniffled, casting a glance to the fingers roaming Steve’s chest. He felt the velvet box digging into his hip and he suddenly knew why he had waited so long. _This._ This entire experience. He was never more sure of the fact that he could not live without Steve Rogers than he was of anything at this moment, and he pulled his hand back to pull the box out. 

“Steve, I- I love you- and-” 

“Shhh.” Steve flinched and smiled. “Don’t... do that.” Steve raised his hand to cup Bucky’s cheek. “Don’t say goodbye. I’ll... be okay, Buck.” 

The ambulance came to a screeching halt. Bucky glanced over to the female paramedic who was moving to the front of the bus, preparing to move the gurney. Bucky stood and waited for the doors to open, slipping the box back into his pocket. 

Steve uttered one sentence before passing out again. 

“Brock… He found us.”

_Shit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See you guys next week! 
> 
> Be sure to follow me on Tumblr (WhoaEasyTiger0124) or check out my FF (Superwoman0124) to check out some of my old fics! Come hang out with meeee!


	21. 'Til Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Steve be okay?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title was taken from Barcelona’s song “‘Til Death” which I highly suggest to any Stucky shipper. Along with the stucky fic based off of it called “this is my last breath” by Flybynightgirl. I think about this fic all the time. :)  
> *** This chapter contains some brief violence, but nothing terribly cringeworthy.

CH 21/25 = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = (‘Til Death) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(An hour earlier)

“Brock?” Steve backed into the brick of the building. Brock overpowered him in the shadows and in the half-light of the street lamp, it made Brock’s ominous silhouette large and terrifying. Seeing his ex-abuser only steeled Steve’s resolve. “What are you doing here?” Steve snarled.

“Took me a while. But I found you, honey. Don’t you wanna see me?” Brock pushed his frame into Steve’s and reached down to cup his ass. “Don’tchu miss me?” 

Steve closed his eyes and winced as Brock went in for a kiss, his ribs aching with seized breathing. He set his arms up and pushed Brock away from him, knocking him into the adjacent wall. 

“No! Brock, I don’t!” Steve shouted and dropped the bag of ice cream to his feet, balling his hands into tight fists. Angry, teary eyes stared at Brock with a fire, and Steve shoved his open hands into Brock’s chest again. “You’re not supposed to be here. You’re not supposed to see me!” He pushed Brock again using all his strength until Brock’s back hit the wall, stunned and angry. 

“Stay **away** from me, Brock, or it’s not just me you’ll have to worry about.” Steve began to march away, triumphant. “Don’t make me come back with my very strong and very protective _partner_ and I’ll only _try_ to keep him from killin’ you.” 

Steve felt hands first, quickly snaking their way around his shoulders and tugging him back, dropping him painfully down onto the concrete. His head stung and his vision blurred but the night sky quickly came into view, his ears whined in a high pitch. When Steve could hear, it was because Brock was bent over him screaming, inches away from his face. 

“You cheatin’ on me again, Rogers? The **fuck** I tell you about that, huh? Hope this guy ain’t too attached to his appendages.” 

Brock began to walk away towards Steve’s house, but before he could get a chance, Steve sprang up, sweeping Brock’s legs out from under him. Brock landed with a rough thud, his face squinted in anger. He sat for a moment before getting up, facing Steve like he would bury him 6-feet under the very asphalt he was standing on.

“You’re gonna pay for that.” 

Steve Rogers was gonna die in an alley. 

At least he’d die swingin’.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

Jan had called the police when he heard the commotion outside and he’d probably saved Steve’s life. They caught Brock three blocks down and took him to the station for arrest and questioning. 

_”Let the fucker rot in prison. ‘Cause if they wouldn’t have caught him, I would have.”_ Bucky thought to himself, punching the nearest brick wall until the flesh on his knuckles were peeled apart and bleeding and he finally forced his breath to even out. _“Keep it together, Barnes. He needs you._

Turned out Brock broke Steve’s top-most rib and it punctured his lung, and they said they couldn't find the internal bleeding. Not without surgery. There’s not enough time to try anything else. 

They got him a lab open and Steve drifted in and out of consciousness, waiting in the hallway for the OR to clear. 

Bucky kissed the back of his hand and told him everything would be alright as they wheeled him down the long corridor. Steve ran his fingers down the open wounds on Bucky's knuckles, but knew better than to ask. The nurse looked at him as they approached the doors.

“Sorry. Can’t come with us back here. We’ll update you when we get news.”

“Okay, “ Bucky nodded, kissing the scar on the back of Steve’s hand as he watched Steve’s smile perk up. “Love you, baby.” 

“I love you too, Bucky.” They started wheeling him back and Bucky reached his hand into his pocket. Bucky felt the firm box there and pulled it out for the second time that night, staring at it. 

“W-wait!” Bucky shouted as the nurses paused and came to a halt halfway through the doors. Bucky rushed over and opened the box, moving forward to thrust it at Steve. Bucky’s hands shook. “Marry me.” 

“Now?” Steve began to panic and held his side, the nurses were shocked and unsure what to do. “You're doing this… now?” 

“Steve, if anything happens back there, I just-” Bucky flashed back to a similar conversation they’d had exactly two years ago, asking Steve for the same thing he was now. Asking Steve to _stay._ “I love you. And I want you to know I'm with you. ‘Til the end of the line. Rather that's tonight, tomorrow, two weeks, or for forever. Take your pick. I want you make me the happiest man in the world by becoming my husband.” 

Steve smiled as Bucky opened the box and showed him the ring. Steve nodded, tears filling his eyes, whispering _yes, yes, yes_ over and over. 

They were both crying as they leaned in for a brief kiss, both wet and salty, but it was the best kiss either of them had ever shared until this point. The first kiss after they decided to spend their life together. Bucky pulled back first and sniffed, nodding to the nurses. 

“Don’t kill him.” Bucky sniffed, smiled and backed away. “He’s got a wedding to plan.” 

“Wish me... luck!” Steve called weakly before the doors closed.

“You don’t need it, punk!” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Exploitative surgery turned into 3 hours of radio silence from the staff of the entire hospital. After a painful call to Nat and Clint telling them where he was and what happened, they appeared shortly after, offering condolences and comfort. Bucky stood and began to pace the waiting room with his fingers threaded behind his lower back, and he did little else.

“I’m going to kill that motherfucker.” Nat wiped a tear from her eye as Clint patted her leg with his palm.

 _’What’s going on?’_ Clint signed. 

“Brock.” Nat explained, making her lips visible to her boyfriend. “Used to beat on Steve, hospitalized him, took a lot for Steve to get over it.” Nat looked at Bucky across the room, pacing by the ER exit. “Somehow, he got to him.” 

_“What do you mean?”_ Clint signed.

“That asshole’s been out of state. When Steve moved, we assumed Brock wouldn't be able to find him.” 

“Find him? How'd he get the new address?” Clint seemed skeptical, scratching his head. 

“I intend to find out.” Nat became suspicious, getting up suddenly and walking to Bucky. She halted two feet short of him before he stopped, eyes focused on the floor. His tired gaze slowly drifted toward her face. 

“So, any particular reason why you messaged Steve all that time ago?” Nat backed him up into a wall. “Or do you have some kinda army-bro-loyalty thing goin’ on with Brock right now and you can’t talk about it.”

“What? Brock?” Bucky sneered, shoving his hand into his forehead. 

“He kept his distance ‘til now. It’s awfully convenient.” Natasha was on a roll, cutting deeper into Bucky’s space. 

“Are you accusing me of leading him here? You think I told him where to find us? Where to find Steve?” He curbed his anger, balling his bruised knuckles into a fist every time Brock's name came up. Brock had better hope they kept him locked up far, far away from him. 

“You’re the only new connection.” She eyed him suspiciously. “Do you even _care_ about Steve?” Nat whispered, her focus as sharp as daggers.

“Nat, you know I do.” Bucky’s face became soft and open, his pleading hands held out to Nat. Clint approached slowly, eyes tracking the faces of the two. “Look, I know you think that I may know that motherfucker, but I don’t. Just through Steve’s nightmares. I hate him as much as you do. And I know you’re angry and you don’t mean it, but I love that man. You want proof? I asked him to marry me.”

“You did?” Nat and Clint screeched in unison, instantly horrified at their shared reaction. 

“Y-yeah.” Bucky pulled the ring box out of his pocket, holding it out to the silent couple. 

“And that hunk said yes to a dumbass like you?” Clint received a smack on the arm from Natasha, who glowered at him.

“Yeah, he did.” Bucky felt the warmth rush to his cheeks as he smiled coyly, opening the box and showing them the band that sat snugly inside. 

“Mazel tov.” Clint smiled, standing to take Bucky into an embrace. They shared a quick bro-hug with taps to their backs as Nat kept her distance.

Bucky wasn’t quite sure what Nat was thinking in that big brain of hers, but he knows she wasn’t making the decision lightly. 

“You’re right.” Natasha’s eyes remained on the floor until she looked up at Bucky with a sigh. “I’m sorry, it’s just- Steve, he’s my-” It looked like she couldn’t find the right word. 

“Family.” Bucky sighed, remembering the proposal. “I know how you feel.” 

Nat went in to hug Bucky and clasped him around the middle. They squeezed until Bucky looked up, watching one of the surgeons come out of the double doors. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“Steven’s stable, for now.” The surgeon rubbed her tented hands around her scrub cap. “We fixed the traumatic pneumothorax by collapsing his lung. It’s common, but he’s got a severe degree. We patched his kidney, and as long as his lungs heal up, he can come home in about a week.” 

“He’s gonna make it?” Bucky sat across from the surgeon, eyes blurry and wet. Nat pressed into his right, Clint to his left. 

“You have to help him heal. He's got a tube in his lung. Gonna set him up with some medicine for the pain and we have to watch for infection. But yeah, he’ll make it.”

If Bucky could move, he'd stop his shaking body long enough to hug this complete stranger who had just saved Steve's life.

“They're moving him to a room upstairs if you'd like to see him.” The woman stood and began to take her leave. “Hopefully, he’s awake.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Bucky scrambled through every hallway until he found a nurse’s station and asked for directions. Nat and Clint attempted to keep up, but they quickly fell behind. 

He rushed into Steve’s door and saw him there, awake and staring out the window. Steve heard the commotion and turned, starting to smile. Bucky rushed to his bed and took Steve into his arms, being careful of his tubing that was covered by a bandage over the right side of his stomach. Bucky covered both sides of Steve’s face in his palms and pulled him in for a rough kiss, a happy sob wrecking its way out of his throat. Bucky pulled back and smiled, watching a tear stream down Steve’s cheek. 

“I can’t believe you saved my life _again.”_ Steve squeaked out, clearing his throat and placed his hands on the back of Bucky’s neck, pulling him in to his chest. 

“I thought I was going to lose you.” Bucky hugs onto Steve’s frame tightly, holding back sobs. 

“I promised you forever, didn’t I?”

Bucky scrambled into his pocket and pulled out the molting velvet box that he’d held onto so tightly in the past, waiting for this moment. He pulled out the silver band with a satisfying thump, and he held it up to Steve. 

Steve smiled and nodded, holding up his left hand for Bucky to take. Tears flowed freely down the blonde’s cheeks and Bucky wiped his nose with his shirt sleeve, slipping the shimmering band onto Steve’s left ring finger. 

Bucky looked up and they shared a sweet smile, leaning in for a kiss. Just as their lips touched, Nat and Clint walked in, puffing. 

The couple touched their foreheads together and looked towards the door, awaiting an explanation.

“We got lost.”

“...in a broom closet.” Clint chuckled, covering his mouth. 

“Clint!” Nat smacked him across the arm lightly. 

“What?” Clint shrugged.


	22. The Trigger and The Playlist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do people normally include chapter summaries? Yes? No? Alright. 
> 
> Prepare yourself for laughs and some exhibitionism. Our boys are warming up for somethin' kinky. ;)

CH 22/25 = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = (The Trigger and the Playlist) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(1st Day Engaged)

Bucky didn’t like hospitals. He didn’t know if his distaste came from the people running down the halls, the constant beeping machines or the fact that almost all his nightmares took place in them. 

He was pretty sure it was the last one. 

Being in the hospital when you weren’t the patient was odd and weird, and you always feel out of place and in the way, but he couldn’t tear himself away from Stevie’s bedside for a moment. Not even when the flashbacks started. Bucky could put his fear aside so he could stay with Steve. He’d been put in worse situations. 

He needed to be here for his fiance, but Bucky was so twitchy and touchy that Steve sensed something was up before Bucky had even fully processed it. 

Bucky’s feet were tucked up on one of the chairs that he parked in front of him, biting his lower lip and picking at his fingernails, staring out the window at the rainy, ominous sky. Steve was wrapped up talking to the doctor about his condition, but he watched Bucky out of the corner of his eye. 

When Doctor Chang left, Steve huffed a laugh, catching Bucky’s attention from the window to Steve’s expecting face. 

“What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours?” 

“What makes you think there’s anything going on?” Bucky squinted, looking at him briefly before returning his attention to the thunderstrike to his right.

“I know you.” Steve shrugged, his face perched in concern. “You’re deep in thought and you’re-” Steve pointed in his direction. “Picking at your nails. You never do that. Unless you’re close to a breakdown.”

Bucky looked up to him softly, his brain processing how much his ~~boyfriend/~~ fiance really knows him. Knows his triggers and his body language. And Bucky is suddenly elated that he finally decided to pop the question. In a hospital. That he was terrified in. 

What a story to tell the grandkids. 

“Remember when we were digging in storage? And I told you I remember everything that happened to me in the hospital?”

Steve nodded.

He sometimes relived the night over and over in his dreams, being pushed down and strapped into an army cot, his arm _burning_ and the _screaming_ he heard coming from his own lungs. He remembers the doctor asking him to count backwards from ten, but not being able to make it past seven. Bucky shook away the memories wanting to creep their way into his brain and refocused, wiping his eye with the back of his hand. 

“Hospitals freak me out.” Bucky looked down and observed his entwined fingers for a moment, dropping them to his chest as he sat back, locked in the icy memory. “Makes me feel like I’m in one of my nightmares.” 

The room remained silent for a moment while Steve processed his statement, tasting his thoughts on his tongue before he spoke them. 

“Wanna know what I think?” 

“Always.” 

Steve smiled. “‘Cause you slept there last night.” Steve pointed at his uncomfortable chairs he’d rapidly put together. He patted beside himself on his left thigh. “Normally you sleep here. You always say I’m your lucky charm.” Steve winked. 

“Careful, Rogers.” Bucky felt his cheeks lift as his face warmed. “I have a rule about dating guys with big heads.” They both huffed a laugh as their eyes connected, both looking away just as quick. 

“Yeah, well, you asked me to marry you, so what’s that say about your rule?” 

“I’d say I’m fucked.” Bucky laughed quietly. “You said yes, so what’s that say about you?”

Steve chuckled, his hand holding his breast.

“You really think I’d fit on that bed with you?” Bucky sounded small and quiet, waiting for Steve to say no. 

Steve observed the small space beside himself, looking it up and down before his lips pulled up in a smirk. 

“We could make it work.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Putting two 6-foot-something-tall men on an exactly 6-foot-tall bed was uncomfortable as hell, until Bucky shifted himself down to rest on Steve’s chest. He listened to Steve’s heartbeat balance out as it blended with the sound of the rain out the window. After yesterday’s scare, he’d never take this thing beating for granted again. He listened to Steve’s uneven breathing, and how the doctor told Steve he needed to laugh a little to help his lung reinflate and heal. Bucky looked upwards to see that Steve had drifted off into a soft sleep, and he pulled his phone out of his back pocket. Bucky was on a mission. If his lover needed to laugh? Bucky could make that happen. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

(Day 2/ Bucky’s sass)

Steve woke up groggily to music, which turned out to be Machinehead by Bush when Steve peeked at the title on the boombox by his head. Gavin Rossdale’s smooth voice glided over the industrial background music, mocking him. 

_Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out. **Breathe in.”** _

Steve smiled and looked toward Bucky, who was covering his face with his hand in the chair across the room, a belly laugh rolling through his chest. Steve let out a little chuckle and smiled, shaking his head. 

Bucky lifted his arm and revealed the black remote, clicking a button to change the song. 

An 80’s twang played on the speaker now, and Steve quickly recognized it. He shook his head faster and let out another punched out laugh as a woman’s high-pitched and warm voice filled the room. 

_“Take my breath awayyyyy.” ___

__“You did _not.”_ Steve whined. _ _

__Bucky howled, wiping joyful tears from his eyes. In response, he clicked the remote again._ _

__Steve listened closely and immediately identified the bass melody as The Police, and even though he knew it was coming, he still felt the laugh rising up his throat._ _

___“Every breath you take, every move you make, every bond you break, Every step you take, I’ll be watchin’ you.” ____ _

____They laughed for a moment until Steve gradually stopped, silent and smirking. He jerked his finger in a “come hither” motion and Bucky stood, walking the short distance to the bed. Steve pushed his hand into the messy locks on the back of Buck’s head and pulled him close, landing a kiss on his lips. They took a moment to lazily linger before it swiftly turned claiming and ravenous, pressing their tongues into the other’s mouth and making throaty, lustful moans._ _ _ _

____Steve pulled back to half-breathe and licked his bottom lip._ _ _ _

____“You’re an asshole.” Steve whispered._ _ _ _

____“You love it.”_ _ _ _

____Bucky moved in to press his lips back to Steve’s, huffing a laugh. Steve grinned as Bucky pressed his fingers onto the back of Steve’s neck, tensing his fingertips into the pliant flesh there._ _ _ _

____Bucky carefully shifted and folded his legs up onto the bed, straddling Steve’s hips with practiced, fluid motions. He was careful with the tubing in Steve’s chest, and the thin hospital gown did nothing to hide Steve’s interested prick, nestled into the gap of Bucky’s denim crotch as he ground down. Bucky began to sway his hips eagerly as he kissed Steve _deeper,_ using his teeth to suck in Steve’s bottom lip and bite it. Steve let out a surprised gasp, arching his back and his hands kneading Bucky greedily. _ _ _ _

____That was the moment that Nurse Sally had chose to check up on Steve, and she opened the door to see the couple groping each other and moaning like horny teenagers. Her eyes blew wide and her face changed to one of utter disbelief and shock before whispering _“ohmygod I’msosorry”_ and quickly backing out of the room. _ _ _ _

____Steve felt the brunet shake in his arms as he raised his head to look at Steve. Buck’s light chortles grew contagious as Steve felt himself begin to grin, his cheeks aching from laughter. Bucky’s simper couldn’t have been wider, and his pearly white teeth shimmered in the over-head light._ _ _ _

____They let the laughter die before Bucky rested his forehead on Steve’s hairline, pressing a kiss to the tip of Steve’s nose._ _ _ _

____“Can’t wait to get you home.” Bucky sighed with his lips tight and his teeth clenched._ _ _ _

____“You gonna take care of me, Nurse Barnes?” Steve chased Bucky’s eyesight with his own, placing a kiss on his boyfriend’s lips._ _ _ _

____“You bet.” Bucky kissed Steve’s nose again, lifting his leg to dismount the blonde. “Sponge baths and all.”_ _ _ _

____“I’m pretty sure I can still take baths by myself, Buck.”_ _ _ _

____“Now,” Bucky scoffs. “Who would know better? You, or a highly experienced caregiver such as myself?”_ _ _ _

____“Newsflash, Buck. You’re not a real nurse.”_ _ _ _

____“No, I’m not. But I'm pretty sure I can get one of these pretty nurses to teach me the procedure. Maybe I’ll start with Nurse Sally.” Bucky smirked and lightly pressed his thumb to the side of Steve’s lips, worshipping their soft fullness. “One orgasm a day. At least.” He wagged his finger in Steve’s face. “Doctor’s orders.”_ _ _ _

____“I thought you were a nurse. Now you’re a doctor?”_ _ _ _

____“It’ll be okay. I watch a lot of tv.”_ _ _ _

____“Is that where you got your PhD? A one-eight-hundred line?”_ _ _ _

____“...Shut up.” Buck laughed and he smiled. “Or no sponge baths for you.”_ _ _ _


	23. Coming Undone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This stay in the hospital will mostly likely kill either one of our boys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just realized that it never told you guys that I uploaded a new chapter because as opposed to adding a new one, I just edited the filler post I made the week previous. I'm back, guys! I promise. 2 more chapters after this and then there's two bonus chapters in the works for you guys!

CH 23/25 = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = (Coming Undone) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

(Fourth Day in this hellhole)

Steve _hates_ hospital food. He would sooner eat three weeks MRE’s before attempting to eat another half-goo glob of lumpy mashed potatoes and yesterday’s gray mystery meat. 

He missed Bucky’s cooking. 

He missed home. 

They pulled the tubing out of Steve’s chest this morning, which was more worrisome for Bucky who was asked to wait in the hallway. It hurt and was uncomfortable, but otherwise it was fine and non-lethal. It didn’t stop Bucky from ringing his hands and pacing the halls. This has not been a good day.

Bucky never left his bedside so far, only going home for showers and to pick up activities for them to do. 

They burned through the boardgames pretty quickly, (Bucky cheats at Monopoly) Twister was mostly a joke, (but it had been one of the very few board games they owned, for some unknown reason) and after endless rounds of two-man poker and “Who-can-aim-ice-into-the-other’s-mouth-better”, they were bored.

Terribly bored. And there was only so much tv they could watch. Steve was bored of the morose, dreary atmosphere and the perky blue floral wallpaper. Bored of the way the unrelenting gurney felt, rigid against his back. Just so bored. 

And he wanted to go home.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

(6th Day)

Even worse than being bored? 

They gave Steve his cell phone back. Bucky has taking a liking to _sexting_ him from across the room. Steve would ignore them at first, glaring daggers across the room and playing them off.

Buck  
  
Hey baby. ;)   
  
I can see up your gown.   
  
Is that a needle in your gown or are you just happy to see me? ;)   
  
Will you STOP saying gown?   
  


Buck  
  
Will you spank me if I don't?   
  


When Bucky looked up from his phone, Steve’s face was flush and lustful, biting into the meaty part of his lower lip.

“You’re _killin’_ me, Buck.” 

“Gotta test the ticker now that we know your lungs are faulty.” Bucky shot a wink directly at Steve, and he settled back down into his chair, going back to his phone. 

 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(The next morning, day 7)

Turns out, Steve didn’t know what to do when Bucky wasn’t here. Steve had begged him to go home and take a nap on a real bed, take a real shower. He supposes he should just go shower himself, but the tingling he felt in his loins were enough to keep him planted. Bucky’s teasing yesterday did strange things to him and he was the first one to admit that Buck had been successful in making him frustrated. It had been a week since he’d orgasmed, and it was starting to get to him a little. His moral compass kept telling him that horniness didn’t belong in a hospital and he felt himself blush and feel shame. He tried to talk himself out of it a million times, but… no one would know if he took care of himself in the shower, right? 

Steve climbed into the bathroom, carefully wrapping his bandages so they wouldn’t get wet. He held onto the bars for little support and dragged himself to the spigot, turning it on to a comfortable temperature. He removed his gown and laid it on the back of the toilet, knowing he’ll be elated when he no longer had to wear the vile garment.

He stepped under the spray and was less picky about the fact that it was too cold. Two years of alternating between his house and Buck’s every two weeks had him trained. 

Mmm. Buck. 

Mmm. _Bucky’s shower._

Oh, the ways they had defiled that tile. 

His suddenly interested cock gave an acknowledged bob, reminding its owner that it needed his touch. He gave in and palmed the shaft, putting his face into the spray. 

His thoughts turned to Bucky, feeling his hands ghosting down his spine to palm his ass and spread it open, run his fingers down the cleft until he touched his hot, wet hole. Steve elicited a gasp as he gripped himself harder, running cold fingers down the warm organ. He felt so open, so needy as he thumbed the head and let out a quiet whimper. Bucky’s ghostly touch was implemented through Steve’s wandering one, reaching back to knead at his own quivering hole. He pressed his face into the cool tile and he almost hissed at the icy contact, instead offering himself a quick distraction by dipping the tip of his digit into his ass. He felt his orgasm approaching, his fingers making quick work at tugging on himself until the orgasm receded just as swiftly. He renewed his pressure, fucking into his hand and bouncing back on his finger, but he let out a frustrated sigh. It wasn’t the same. 

No matter how much he teetered over the edge, he couldn’t seem to come without Bucky. It felt like it had been an hour already. He rolled his eyes and huffed a deep breath, defeated, and shut off the water. He could only hope his blue balls would stop aching before Bucky got here. He toweled off and put the stupid teal-blue gown back on, walking off into the warm room. 

When he closed the door he found Bucky parked in his usual corner, his feet lifted onto the side of the chair. His demeanor was relaxed and his hair was wet, left loose to brush along the sides of Buck’s neck. Even though Bucky had been gone less than two hours, Steve found himself blushing at Bucky’s radiance, thankful for the utter bliss he felt being with the brunet every day.

“Hey babe!” He kicked his feet down and sat up straight, snapping at attention. “How was your shower?” 

“It was okay. A little cold.” Steve cleared his throat and decided to omit that he’d failed to come. “How was yours?” 

“Not as fun without you.” Bucky crossed his arms and sat back, watching Steve crawl into bed. “Hey, babe?”

“Mhm?” Steve seated himself back into his bed, covering himself to preserve what modesty he had left.

“Remember when I beat you in that foot-race back home last week?” 

“Yeah?” Steve looked at him as if to ask, “What of it?” 

Bucky’s coy smirk grew up his cheeks and he darted his tongue out to lick his bottom lip. He lifted the looped twine of a soft-sided, inconspicuous department store bag with only his index finger. No one else but them would know what was inside. “Time to cash in.”

“Here?” Steve looked around, making sure the door was closed, the heart rate monitor picking up in subtle speed. “You want to do that now?” 

“Torturing you will keep my mind off things. Plus, you’ve never minded before.” Bucky winked. “‘Sides, what else are you gonna do other than sit here bored _stiff?”_ Bucky motioned to the rock-hard tent in the front of Steve’s thin, scrappy “clothing” that he hadn’t even noticed until it twitched. 

The pun was so totally fucking intended and they both knew it. 

“Did you at least bring lube?” 

“Am I that evil that you’d doubt I wouldn’t?” Bucky laughed and shook his head, his cheeks tight and peaking. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Somehow, Steve got talked into doing this _alone_ which was A.) not as fun and B.) hard as hell to do when you can’t maneuver correctly. Something about Bucky being too tempted to bend him over the sink and take him right there.

But he made due. He talked himself through it with light tugs to his cock and a subtle pull on his balls. He stood up ramrod straight when the plug was fully enclosed inside of him, and oddly, he felt something in his brain click. Here he was, vulnerable as hell, 6 inch plug worked up his ass in the middle of his hospital bathroom. Even after that realization, he felt the tug of happiness and wholeness, feeling good for complying with Bucky’s every whim. He wouldn’t have done this for anyone else. He glanced at the first scar Brock left him on the back of his right hand and his eyes bounced to the ring finger of his left, smiling down at the silver band that sat there. 

He knew he made the right choice. 

He reached for his t-shirt before he felt something light a fire in his groin, vibrations spreading from his ass and pouring into his balls. His cock instantly filled and throbbed, bending over to find purchase before he fell. The vibration cut off and he found himself having to catch his breath. 

“What the hell was that?” He whispered to the tile, standing up straight. He hadn't known it _vibrated._

Before he got the chance to thread his arms through his t-shirt, the pulsation kicked up, slightly less forceful this time. This speed was comfortable and less distracting, but no less pleasurable. He forced out a sigh and pulled his arms through his shirt. The tremors inside remained at a dull thrum, just enough for Steve to be reminded that it was there. Especially when he bent over to yank his jeans up his legs. 

Steve heard the laughing before he even reached for the doorknob. He knew Bucky was getting a kick out of this, but with the way his cock was leaking on his thigh, he honestly couldn’t blame him. Steve felt needy and hot, on edge and on fire. He felt alive. 

He couldn’t tell Bucky that. 

He walked out with his head held high, and looked at Bucky. Who was near-cackling and hiding his face behind his phone.

“Why would you give me this kind of power?” Bucky’s face quickly dropped to the screen, exploring menus and different options, stifling the little burst of laughter that kept creeping up his chest. 

“You are such a jer- _Oh god.”_ A wave of stronger, harder sensations hit his prostate like a ton of bricks. If Steve had less willpower and a weaker resolve, he would have begged Bucky to let him come.

“I’m a what?” Bucky smirked and leaned his head forward, tilting his ear in Steve’s direction. “I didn’t quite catch that, punk.” 

“Fuck _me._ ” Steve felt himself awash in the emotions, wanting so badly to reach down and grasp his throbbing cock to give it some relief. 

“I kind of already am, aren’t I?” Bucky turned down the settings to something a bit duller, and Steve felt his feet carry him to Bucky. Steve rushed into his arms and bent both knees over his lover's, finding his lips with his own. Steve slotted his hips in between the arm of the chair and ground his crotch in Bucky’s lap. Steve felt Bucky’s tongue tracing his lips as they pulled apart, his leg hand lifting to grab onto his ass. Bucky slapped his pseudo-palm down hard on Steve’s asscheek. Steve had to bite his lip to stifle the moan. 

The plug thrummed happily inside and Steve’s cock felt full and bursting, desperate for Bucky’s touch and some fresh air. 

“That good, huh?” Bucky traced the line of Steve’s shoulder with a light brush of his lips and teeth, heaving a warm breath and giving Steve shivers. “Haven’t seen you this greedy for it in a while.” 

“You have no idea.” Steve felt Bucky’s attention on his shoulder falter, but he pressed kisses into Bucky’s neck anyway. Steve felt the plug begin to stutter, randomly switching vibrations between off and on. His neck arched back into a low moan. Bucky, satisfied with his new choice of the “fireworks” pattern, sat back into the seat and raised his fingers to Steve’s hips, dragging them forward and back over the indent in his jeans. Steve could feel his cock against Buck’s and it was just so _perfect._

“Sorry, baby.” Bucky didn’t sound very sorry. “If I would have known you were gonna love it this much, I woulda’ held off ‘til we got you home. Taken real good care of you. Opened you up myself all nice and slow like you like.” It was so dirty that Steve had stopped breathing, not wanting to miss a single syllable. “Is that what you were thinking about when you were shoving that fake cock up your ass, baby?” Bucky traced the lines of Steve’s jeans and palmed his ass, shifting Steve to grind down on him harder. “My tongue and my fingers opening you up for my cock?” 

_”Bucky…”_

The vibration and the warm feeling of Bucky’s cock and Bucky’s _filthy_ freakin’ mouth. Steve could have came, but he knew his body was waiting for something. Something like permission?

 ** _Knock Knock._**

Steve scrambled, his eyes going wide as he lept off of Bucky’s lap. Someone opened the door and began to come in. 

“Are you decent, Steven?” The nurse called in from behind the sheet they’d pulled.

“J-Just a second!” Steve called out as he fixed his shirt and watched Bucky fix his, his hands shooting to his hair next. “Come in!” He flattened it and cleared his throat, feeling the vibrations remain. His eyes went wide as he motioned his pointer finger across his throat to Bucky for him to cut the power, just in time for the nurse to pull the curtain back. Bucky smiled and lifted his phone, sitting back, scoffing a laugh and crossing his legs, letting Steve test his poker face.

“You’re free to go, Mr. Rogers. We have to wheel you out, so you’ll have to wait for transport, but you should be home in an hour.” 

Steve felt a bead of sweat drop down his back as the nurse read his chart off next, handing him a clipboard. Just as Steve bent to take the clipboard, Bucky changed the speed a notch higher, causing Steve’s voice to crack as he half-shouted, “Thank yOU.” at her. She nodded and raised an eyebrow but watched him sign the papers anyway. He handed it back and shot a wayward glance in Bucky’s direction, watching the silent laughter rise in his chest. His hand palmed his own breast and landed with a rough thud, but Steve’s attention was brought back to the nurse. 

“Remember to take all your belongings, and here’s your script for your meds.” She handed him a folder. “If you need anything else, just ring the bell. We’ll come runnin’.”

“Thank you.” Steve smiled through the pressure in his groin. 

She swiftly left without a backward glance. 

Bucky began to cackle just as Steve turned a playful, icy glare in his direction. 

“You really are _the worst.”_

“Then maybe you’re the worst for lovin’ me.” Bucky caught his breath and calmed down, smiling sweetly at his lover. 

“I’m okay with that.” Steve shrugged and ignored the persistent buzzing in his crotch. His face growing warm and loving, which was odd, considering the kinkiness of the moment. Steve’s eyes suddenly became hooded and full of want, and Bucky could see that Steve was conflicted. ‘Conflicted about what?’ Bucky’s mind wandered. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” 

“I’m thinking about rather I want your cock inside me now, or if I can last until we get home.”

Such bold responses from Buck’s shy, wholesome lover gave him chills. 

Another poor-timed introduction of the transfer crew forced them to find out the answer to Steve's question. 

The car ride home was almost impossible, Steve hands on him when the vibrations kicked on, a new rhythm every time. 

“Does someone have a new favorite toy?” Bucky whispered harshly, attempting to keep his eyes on the road and his hands on the wheel. 

Steve laughed, lifting his lips far up enough from Bucky’s exposed flesh long enough to be heard. 

“I’m ready to come apart in this car. What do you think?” 

“I’m thinkin’ payback’s a bitch so I better be nice and give you what you want.” 

“Damned straight, you better.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Break ‘cause #wordcount
> 
>  
> 
> I post here every FRIDAY. If you wanna check out what else I have or simply like the FF.net platform better, come check me out there. (Superwoman0124) Don't forget to follow me on Tumblr (whoaeasytiger0124) for chapter updates, general shenanigans or just some plain ol' fun.


	24. Feeling Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Go back and read the last chapter first! It never sent out emails that I updated last week. :o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, guys. One more after this! (Technically three, including bonus chapters) Are you ready for this legendary journey to be over? I'm not! I LOVE these characters, and I'm sure at one point in the future, I'll write more in this AU if anyone wants me to. :) 
> 
> ___________  
> Come hang out with me on Tumblr! (Whoaeasytiger0124) 
> 
> Check out my newer stories on Ao3! (Superwoman0124) 
> 
> ______________

CH 24/25 = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = (Feeling Home) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

 

Bucky backed him up against the kitchen table, jacking up the vibrations before pocketing his phone for the last time, devouring Steve’s mouth like he couldn’t breathe without him. Bucky’s hands roamed Steve’s entire torso, his fingers tracing Steve’s firm pecs and his abs, rolling off the button of the blonde’s pants. He dipped his hand into the tight waistline of Steve’s jeans, adjusting his arm for the awkward reach. He palmed Steve’s shaft and he let out a sharp moan, his mouth hanging open with surprise and pleasure. 

Before Bucky blinked, Steve was spread eagle on the table, naked and quaking with his legs over his shoulder while Bucky ever-so-roughly toyed with the plug. He pushed his hand flat against it, twisting and turning it. 

“You better fuck me before I come all over this table.” Steve’s breath hitched and his voice became gravel-fed, his teeth snarling like an animal. 

“Yes, _sir.”_ Bucky barked. He pulled the plug out faster than he’d meant to, but Steve’s facial expression became open and blissful, his eyes shifted from the ceiling to Bucky’s eyes. Buck lifted his arms around Steve’s strong shoulders, lifting him off the table and uncouthly flipping him over, dropping his chest onto the smooth wooden surface. He palmed himself, slicking the precum down the shaft. He slapped the head of his dick off his hole before Steve pushed back, swallowing Bucky to the hilt with two agonizingly slow thrusts of his hips backwards. 

Bucky pressed his fingers into the meat of Steve’s hips and thrusted hard and fast, his body knowing how Steve likes to get fucked. Bucky could feel Steve’s arm scramble beneath himself to circle his fingers around the bottom of his shaft, stopping the impending orgasm from brimming to the surface. 

“You okay?” Bucky didn’t dare stop, but watched Steve’s open face gasp for breath. 

“Perfect, now.” Steve gripped onto the end of the table, his cock in the other. Bucky quickly debated giving him no choice to come, but instead, decided to make it interesting. 

Bucky bent down and whispered into Steve’s ear, creating a new and sharper angle of thrusts. “Think you can come more than once tonight?”

“Probably could after that torture.” Steve pulled his hand off the table and bit into his thumb, stifling his moans. Bucky quickly pulled Steve’s hand out, thrusting hard and gripping Steve’s hip tight with his right hand. 

“Don’t do that.” Bucky half whined, renewing his rigor when his thumb pressed into the crest of Steve’s hips. “Wanna hear _everything_ that comes out of that dirty mouth tonight.” 

 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

(The Next Morning)

The pancakes tasted especially delicious the next morning, probably because Steve knew that 9 hours ago, his come from multiple orgasms was spattered in the spot beneath his plate. Plus, Bucky was _really_ good at cooking breakfast. 

Luckily, Bucky had been prepared for the amount of carbs they’d need today, (and yay, no more hospital food!) and sat a stack of 16 fluffy golden pancakes between them. Steve cut his 6th pancake happily, making a happy little _‘mmm’_ sound with each bite. And Bucky wondered why Steve agreed to be his husband. 

“I’m sorry we didn’t get to spend our anniversary like you wanted to.” Bucky said between bites. They hadn’t really talked about _that night,_ but at this point the cops had arrested Brock and brought him up on charges. They would need to go to police station in the coming days now that Steve was healed up. Bucky had always felt horrible that they spent their anniversary like any other day, aside from the proposal, to which had been to Bucky’s surprise as well. He felt horrible that he hadn’t planned anything special, work keeping him busy and just enjoying the time he got to spend with Steve. 

“It’s alright.” Steve sat his napkin down and began to collect plates, forking the last pancake and chucking it onto Bucky’s plate. “Any plans today?” 

“Other than the gym later? Nope. Guys at work gave me ‘til tomorrow off so I could go to the station with you.” Bucky sat back and finished chewing, picking up the plate and bringing it to the sink. Steve walked to him and kissed him on the nose. 

“Good!” Steve walked across the living room with a smile on his face, clumsily pulling two cloaked wooden structures from the closet that were as tall as him. He dragged them next to each other and pulled the sheet off the top, revealing twin easels, complete with blank white canvas. “Happy Belated Anniversary, Bucky.”

“Steve, what is this?” 

“Well, here’s the thing. I had this big party planned with balloons and decorations and all our friends. It was for the day _after_ I got attacked, which with my bad luck makes sense, a-and Nat, um-well, anyway. I was going to give you this easel. So we could paint together- some...sometime.” Steve started to panic as he observed Bucky. “Baby, are you breathing?” 

Bucky seemed stuck in his thoughts. His lips were parted and his fingers prone, but a quick shift in Bucky’s mood quickly assured Steve it was a false alarm. He relaxed as Bucky’s form renewed, and he took a step closer into the threshold of the room. 

“Steven Grant Rogers, I picked the wrong time to ask you to marry me. It should have been now… right now.” Bucky rushed to Steve wearing an elated smile, gathering Steve in his arms. “I love it so much.” 

He quickly embraced Steve and a tear slipped down his nose. 

“You remembered, huh? You promised to teach me to draw?” Bucky felt rather sensitive, but he couldn’t help but feel blessed that Steve was showing a romantic side that Bucky only saw peek out every so often. This pretty much took the cake. 

“Of course I do. I think about it every time I pass your painting in the hallway.”

“Thank you, Stevie. Really. I love it. ” Bucky pecked a quick kiss on Steve’s lips, turning back to the canvas. “Now, down to the important question. Are you gonna be my nude model?” 

Steve smiled and a blush ran into his cheeks. 

“We’ll work up to it.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Four different medias later, they finally agreed that pencils and paints would work best for this subject. Steve began by sketching the shapes on his own canvas, and Bucky closely followed. He sketched each round curve with light fingers, and Steve watched in awestruck admiration. He suddenly felt the urge to reach out and _touch_ his fiance just for the contact, and Steve quickly decided to abandon his drawing. His fingers found Bucky’s hips quickly, rocking on the balls of his feet with Bucky’s slight sway as he sketched. 

“I never knew that a bowl of fruit could piss me off so much.” He barked groughly as he sloped the adjacent side of the banana, finding it angular when it needed to be rounded. He sucked his teeth in aggravation, erased, and tried again. He quickly perfected it, and moved on to the grapes. 

Steve stayed attached until Bucky was finished, and judging by the proud smirk on his face, he was quite pleased with himself. Steve let his hand drift to the Bucky’s waistband, evading the elastic to cup Bucky’s ass, giving it a tight squeeze. He let his lips rest on the junction between Buck’s sensitive shoulder and neck, pressing urging kisses into his skin. 

“Does the Principal know you’re groping your students, Mr. Rogers?” 

“I am the principal, kiddo.” Steve said with a smirk, a cocky air that went straight to Bucky’s crotch. Especially when Steve kept at the subtle pressure to his ass, the rigid and warm press of his cock a pleasant reminder of his presence, along with the soft lips that continued to press gluttonous kisses to his bare shoulder. 

“Steve,” Bucky moaned. “is there not _one thing_ we can do together without you stopping to put your hands all over me?” The question was whispered and light across a half-hitched breath. Bucky’s sarcasm just didn’t stop. Not even for the intimate moments. 

Bucky’s left hand reached back to thread into Steve’s hair and coaxed him into the curve of his throat to press biting-kisses along his skin. Steve thrusted his hips forward causing Bucky to let out a harsh gasp as he pressed his palms flat on the canvas, riding Steve out as he pressed in tight, little circles.

“Keep painting.” Steve pressed his chest against his lover’s back, licking the shell of his earlobe. 

“What if I screw it up?” 

“I’ll get you a new one.” Steve growled as he nipped into the skin of Bucky’s shoulder. “Keep.. painting.” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

There was paint _every_ where. In their fury to remove clothes, they were forward-thinking enough to lay a blanket down over the expensive area rug, but the curtains were destroyed. Purple paint went up the sides and the red almost spattered the window, but from where they lay, huffing on the floor, it was so entirely worth it. Steve didn’t much care for the curtains anyway.

Bucky looked up at his “work of art” and sneered. Shaky paint lines, smudged fingerprints and a lopsided banana, but hey. He could have done worse, considering the circumstances. 

“Happy Belated Anniversary, Steve.” Bucky turned to Steve who was laying less than an arm’s length away, his legs threaded through the feet of the easel. 

“Happy Belated, Baby.” Steve winked and cupped his hand to his chest. He flung himself upwards and landed on his feet. Bucky watched and tucked his fingers beneath his head. He tracked his movements as Steve’s narrow ass shifted while he walked to the kitchen, opening up the freezer and poking his head inside. Bucky didn’t know if he was checking what to make for dinner, or if he was trying to cool himself off. Probably a bit of both. 

“Cheeseburgers for supper?” 

“Whatever you want, baby.” Bucky watched Steve pull the meat from the freezer and set it on the counter, watching the way his muscles in his arms twitch, and Buck felt his cock give an appreciative twitch. “On second thought, I’m hungry for something else.” 

He fumbled to his toes and launched himself in Steve’s direction, grabbing Steve by the back of his neck to bring him in for a hungry kiss. 

They got their belated anniversary celebration after all.


	25. Together 'til the end of the line

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp guys, I don't know if all of you can see this 'cause I got flagged for abuse this morning, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed! But here it is. The final chapter of Brace for Impact. I have 2 bonus chapters in the works, but I don't know if it'll be ready in time to post this Friday.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = CH 25/25 (Together ‘til the end of the line) = ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =   
(6 months later)

Steve didn’t know why he was hiding in the bathroom. After Nat had tied his tie and faced him into the mirror, Steve felt shocked. And nervous. _So very_ nervous. He excused himself quickly and ran, ducking himself into the nearest bathroom and locked himself into the nearest stall. He took a few deep breaths as his anxiety training had taught him, but he still felt his heart thundering out of his chest. 

“What the hell is wrong with me?” Steve whispered to himself and it echoed off the stall walls. Steve tucked his feet up as he heard the bathroom door open abruptly, slamming into the rubber doorstep as someone stormed in, going directly to the sinks. Steve peeked through the cracks beside the left of the door and watched as the frazzled and panicked gentleman rested his palms on either side of the basin, staring at himself in the mirror. 

“Get your shit together, Barnes. This is the best day of your life.” Bucky’s lips formed a faux-smile and it quickly receded, and the unconvincing smile made Bucky maybe a little more anxious. Bucky turned on the water and cupped his shaking hands under the stream, bringing it up to his face and dousing himself in the water. 

“Baby?” Steve's small voice shattered Bucky's isolated visage, forcing him to shift in the direction of the intruder. 

“Steve?” Bucky’s quaking voice came out in a hushed whisper.

Steve stood up and slowly unlocked the stall, pulling the door into his body and sliding himself out. He stared at the floor as Bucky observed his outfit, and a legitimate smile reached his cheeks. 

“You look beautiful.” Bucky appeared almost speechless, his jaw remaining ajar. 

Steve felt the urge to cover himself at Bucky's scalding stare, but let Bucky look. 

“Isn't it bad that we see each other before the wedding?” Steve took a hesitant step forward. 

“It’s bad luck to see a bride.” Bucky licked his parched lips and cracked into a half-laugh. “Last I checked, neither one of us is wearin’ a dress.”

The thought of Bucky in a white wedding dress and lace veil made Steve smile and let out a light-hearted chortle. 

"Nervous?" Bucky wiped his hand down his face with a sigh and offered the other to Steve. Steve took it and stepped into Bucky’s space. 

"Hell yeah. Aren’t you?" Steve placed a kiss on the top of Bucky’s nose, making him cringe adorably. 

"Absolutely. You know crowds aren't my thing." Buck shrugged and pulled Steve in, kissing his cheek. 

"It'll be over soon enough. Today's about you and me. Spending forever together." Steve slid into Bucky’s arms and rested his head on Buck’s shoulder, enjoying this solitary moment to touch each other for the first time today. It had been the first time since Steve opened his eyes this morning that he didn’t feel like he was spinning and on edge, and the world finally felt righted in his lover’s embrace. 

“No second thoughts?” Bucky sounded almost hesitant to ask, but he hugged Steve slightly tighter. 

“Never.” Steve shook his head, hoping to express to Bucky that he was being honest, and it was just the attention making him freak, not the thought of getting married to him. Which he was _so_ ready for. ”What about you? You ready for this?”

“More than I’ve ever been in my life.” Bucky faced towards the door and took Steve with him. A hushed giggle and a quick kiss in the hallway, shared by Bucky pressing the palm of his hand into Steve’s cheek, wet with freely flowing tears. They parted quietly, Bucky turning back to watch Steve go before he opened the door to the church and awaited his husband-to-be to meet him at the altar.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

“When I met Steve, it's quite possible that we hated each other.” Bucky raised his champagne glass up in the open air, surveying the large room of laughing friends and family around him, Steve to his left. Steve was smiling and his cheeks were high, shaded in a light peach. Bucky faced back out to the crowd. “But eventually, I convinced him to give me a chance. Fate, karma, call it whatever you want, but when Steve walked out of that coffee shop on our first date? I knew I’d see him again.”

Bucky’s captive audience awed and clapped, subtle stifled sniffles could be heard. “When I bought the engagement ring before we even moved in together, everyone told me I was crazy;” Bucky pointedly glanced over at Clint, who didn’t act surprised he was being singled out. “-but it made sense. Because Steve and I make sense. And I knew no amount of time together would change what we mean to each other. And right now? He’s my world. He always was and always will be. Forever and ever. ‘Til the end of the line.” Bucky stopped and leaned over to press a kiss on Steve’s cheek. 

The crowd cooed and applauded as Bucky took a sip of his champagne and sat down, pressing a kiss to his new husband’s lips. 

“Top that.” Bucky smiled into Steve’s space as he kissed him again. 

“Did you bring your tissues?” Steve winked and stood up, dragging a laugh from his husband. 

Steve looked out into the crowd and cleared his throat, warming up his best smile. 

“The day I met Bucky, I lost a lot. I lost my apartment, half my clothes, and almost lost my motorcycle. And Bucky barely knew me and believe it or not, our first date _did not_ go well, but still... he still stood by me. Much like he did at the altar today.” Steve placed his hand on Buck's shoulder, chancing a glance to his upturned face. 

“He took me to a bar and helped me feel better. I may have lost a lot that day, but I also gained a lot, too. The man who would be... my husband.” His eyes became blurry and tense, so he faced back out to the crowd, trying not to cry. He failed and let out a choked sob, peering over to Bucky and hearing another ‘aww’ from the audience. “If it weren’t for your kind heart towards an asshole stranger, we wouldn’t be here today. And I am so thankful, every day of my life, that I met you. You’re my world, my stars, my everything.” Steve watched a single tear roll down Bucky’s cheek and he quickly wiped it away with his thumb. “I love you, Buck.” 

Bucky’s quiet returned response was lost in the uproarious applause and hooting of the crowd, the friends and family they cared so deeply about. Steve and Bucky both sat and looked around, proud of their hard work finally paying off. They were married. They finally did it. They could finally spend the rest of their lives together. 

But first? 

They party. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

At one point and time Nat and Clint had disappeared, but Bucky and Steve weren't bothered by it. They were fluid on the dancefloor, their arms around each other and their foreheads touching. The music made them sway, and with each passing congratulatory whisper, they'd smile, say thank you, shake the occasional hand and move on. The walls could have been taken away by a tornado and they wouldn't have even noticed.

However, full bellies for the first time today and 3 shots of whiskey will loosen up any groom. And when the “Cupid Shuffle” came on, Bucky all but jumped on Steve's feet to get himself into position. He whooped and cheered his husband on, smiling when Steve's uncoordinated body would collide into his. He was patient with Steve as he showed him the moves in time with the song and eventually, Steve got it. 

Just in time for the song to be over.

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =

The limo driver was late. _Of course._ But it gave them some time to decompress in the fresh air and talk to Bucky’s parents, make their rounds of goodbyes before cornering Nat and Clint. 

“You never told us where you guys were going.” 

“We didn’t know until today.” Bucky huffed, slinging his arm around Steve’s shoulder. “Steve had the brilliant idea that we go to the airport and ask for a flight available to anywhere as long as it left at 7 PM.” 

“And where are they sendin’ you?” Clint butted in, taking a drag off the fat celebratory cigar in his mouth. 

“Budapest.” Steve and Bucky replied simultaneously, happy, easy smiles on both their faces. 

“Budapest?” Clint sounded out and looked over at Nat with wide eyes. “Remember the last time we were in Budapest, honey? On your…” Clint took the cigar out of his mouth with his first two fingers, forming finger quotations. “… _business trip?”_

“We don’t talk about what happened in Budapest.” Natasha admitted quietly, quickly and habitually checking her surroundings. Nat bent at the knees to rifle through her clutch purse, pulling out an elongated, red velvet box, topped with a teal bow. “Thought you might need some more overwhelming news, now that the wedding stress is over.” 

She handed it to the couple that took it together, and Steve began to dismantle the bow. The box fell apart and nestled inside was a positive pregnancy test. 

“Congrats, Newlyweds.” Clint smiled and slung his arm around Nat, chuckling lightly. “You’re gonna be daddies!” 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ =   
(a month and a half earlier- Cue flashback waves)

Bucky paced the room, thumbing the thick stubble tracing his cheekbones. “Do you wanna fuck Natasha or should I?” 

“Jeez, Buck, you gotta be so blunt about it?” 

“Someone’s gotta, you know.” Bucky sat down beside Steve on the bed and gripped his hand. 

Steve started. “Not really! I’ve heard In Vitro-” 

“Is sixteen grand a pop and has a fail rate of 45 percent.” Bucky finished. Steve shrugged and worried his temples.

“I know, but-” 

“But what? This is our best bet, Steve.” Bucky kissed the scar on the back of Steve’s hand and moved to kiss Steve’s engagement ring. A thought popped in his head, and he flashed Steve a mischievous smile. “Unless you wanna use the turkey baster?” 

“Don’t be gross, babe.” Steve chuckled anyway.

“So, we’re going traditional. Back to my previous question.” Bucky sighed. “Rock, Papers, Scissors, shoot?” Steve could tell that Buck was half-serious, wearing that smug smile he wore in uncomfortable conversations. 

“There’s a story to tell the grandkids.” Steve’s forehead dropped into his hands as he sighed and rocked forward. 

Bucky kissed the stretch of skin that was revealed on Steve’s neck, whispering his words into the hollow dip. “Is a coin toss more romantic?”

“You know you’re literally five, right?” Steve huffed, his smile perking up when his laugh erupted.

“Wanna draw straws?”

“I love you, you _idiot.”_ Steve toppled Bucky over with kisses and an attack hug. 

= ✪ = = ✪ = = ✪ = 

Steve looked at Bucky with the glassiest smirk as he clasped Bucky on the back and brought him into his chest. They hugged for a moment and breathed each other in, the relief of the news setting in. Who knew Natasha would get pregnant that quickly. 

When Bucky released him, Steve moved toward the couple with both arms outstretched to hug both Nat and Clint together, but quickly backed off when he realized that his elbow was close to Nat’s stomach. 

“Oh no!” Steve jumped back before his hands hovered over Nat’s belly, possibly scared to touch for fear of Nat’s latent repercussions. He looked up at Nat’s expecting face and she nodded tightly, absolutely not shedding a tear at the exact same time. Steve quickly wiped his cheek with the sleeve of his tux as the driver pulled up beside them, and Steve got to touch his baby for the first time. Bucky was quickly behind him, one hand on the small of Steve’s back, the other on top of Nat’s slim tummy. “Hi there!” Steve whispered, leaning in. Steve was suddenly caught up in such extreme emotions of happiness, excitement and an abrupt sense of terrible fear. 

“How long?” Bucky wiped his own cheek, quickly righting himself to come eye to eye with Clint. 

“I’m about 4 weeks along.” Nat glowed brightly. “Who knew it would have only taken twice?” Steve stood and hugged Nat delicately.

“Thank you, Natasha.” Steve held her at arm’s length and kissed both cheeks. 

“You’re my family, Rogers. We’ll do just about anything for our families.” 

“Don’t you mean Rogers-Barnes?” Bucky followed, smiling ear to ear. 

“Sorry, Steven. You need a new nickname.” Nat chuckled. “Your new last name is a mouthful.”

“That’s my fault.” Bucky pulled Steve’s arm back to tug him in for a kiss, resting his forehead on Steve’s when they parted.

The driver chose then to get out of his seat and open the rear passenger door for the newlyweds, clearing his throat. 

Steve and Bucky (lightly) hugged Nat and Clint again, calling out a final goodbye to the friends and family that had come to witness their joining. The couple briefly shared a kiss before ducking their heads into the limo and pulling away. 

With a baby on the way? Things would be tougher when they got home. They’d have to convert Steve’s workspace into a nursery, start baby-proofing the house, and to plan Nat the best freaking baby shower in the history of the world. The wedding gift that she had presented them only further concreted the thrumming bond they shared, and they could finally start their happily ever after together. 

Who'd have thought that with how much shit they'd been through in their lives would gift them this great partnership they'd tweaked and perfected over time? Bucky and Steve felt like soulmates, whole and complete when they were side-by-side. And now that they were married? They'd be together forever. 'Til the end of the line.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed the journey as much as I did. :')   
> I might keep posting bonus chapters as I go, so stay subscribed!   
> Leave me some love in the comments if you love these guys!
> 
> See you soon, peeps!


End file.
